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Zach Funk @zachfunk.bsky.social · 1d

www.eventbrite.com/e/the-chippe...

Catch me on this fantastic lineup tomorrow down in the strip district! #pittsburgh #standup #localcomedy

Zach Funk @zachfunk.bsky.social · 11d

“I was repeatedly assured the beans were magic,” stated one serf podcaster

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Zach Funk @zachfunk.bsky.social · 12d

Also we now know the “would you go back in time and kill Hitler” isn’t a hypothetical question for him.

Zach Funk @zachfunk.bsky.social · 12d

Trump has claimed he warned Pete Hegseth about Bin Laden one year before 9/11 and people are saying oh he has dementia and they couldn’t be more wrong. As a non consecutive two time POTUS Trump has access to Grover Cleveland’s Time Machine AND DID NOTHING TO STOP 9/11 other than tell a random drunk.

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Zach Funk @zachfunk.bsky.social · 14d

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Zach Funk @zachfunk.bsky.social · 20d

Fun fact comics working Mussolini’s comedy festival were paid in caster oil drink tickets.

Zach Funk @zachfunk.bsky.social · 22d

So, so excited to be part of the Chipped Ham Comedy Jam this year! Don’t miss headliner Bailey Pope she’s hilarious and we’ve been on festivals together before. This will be a great show you don’t want to miss. Tickets are moving fast so get them now at www.eventbrite.com/e/the-chippe...

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Zach Funk @zachfunk.bsky.social · 25d

As someone who grew up in Lancaster county PA I promise you the Amish are not free of autism regardless of what the glorious leader and his court alchemist say.

No neurotypical could plan a barn raising I promise you.

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Zach Funk @zachfunk.bsky.social · 26d

Ready for the rapture tomorrow like

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Discover & share this buffy the vampire slayer GIF with everyone you know. GIPHY is how you search, share, discover, and create GIFs.

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Zach Funk @zachfunk.bsky.social · 27d

I don’t think people should be shot and killed for their ideas. Hell I’m against the death penalty.

However if some people could hurry up and die peacefully and naturally in bed surrounded by loved ones the world would be a much better place.

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Zach Funk @zachfunk.bsky.social · 27d

I don’t know where this rumor that the Rapture is happening on Tuesday night but I host a comedy open mic Tuesday nights so it’s reassuring to know I won’t miss anyone at the mic regardless.

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Zach Funk @zachfunk.bsky.social · 27d

It’s #nationalbatmanday so here’s the first joke off my 2019 stand up album Brains Are Weird which can be found all over the net. Keep an eye out for the follow up album FARCE later this year.

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Zach Funk @zachfunk.bsky.social · Sep 17

I’ll see you all on Jan 6 2026 outside of the City Paper offices for a day of love, unity and minor to serious treason! Until then…courage.

Zach Funk @zachfunk.bsky.social · Sep 17

But the campaign doesn’t stop here! Rudy Giuliani is currently roaming Southside is a drunken haze looking for evidence of fraud! To be clear he was in Southside already and I slipped him a DEPRESSION IS PROPAGANDA t-shirt in exchange for his services.

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Zach Funk @zachfunk.bsky.social · Sep 17

WE DID IT! Two 2nd place votes in the City Paper best of! I’d like to thank everyone who supported me and spread the misinformation that I’m the best local comedian and L2L is the best charity event. Despite all evidence to the contrary we stood together to deny facts like proper 2025 Americans!

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Zach Funk @zachfunk.bsky.social · Sep 15

Dracula did nothing wrong.

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Zach Funk @zachfunk.bsky.social · Sep 15

It’s a real joy when I can recognize individual laughter in the larger crowd. Big noticeable laughers you know who you are and you are so loved.

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Zach Funk @zachfunk.bsky.social · Sep 15

Hey folks I just got to listen to the first cut of the FARCE recording and holy crap am I excited for when it releases.

Big thanks to everyone who came and helped make it a successful recording.

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Zach Funk @zachfunk.bsky.social · Sep 14

Brian Kilmeade’s apology for saying the homeless and mentally ill should be forcibly put down has very strong Dennis Reynolds energy.

“I i- i- i-i-i- I I just need you to see me as i-i-i- i- as I am. I need this. I need this from you. i-i-I...I need this from you, please.”

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Zach Funk @zachfunk.bsky.social · Sep 13

One quote stands out above the rest.

“We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be.”

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Zach Funk @zachfunk.bsky.social · Sep 13

With everything going on in the wake of Kirk’s shooting I’ve been thinking about Vonnegut’s Mother Night. In the book a man goes undercover as a Nazi propagandist and is unfortunately very, very good at his job.

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Zach Funk @zachfunk.bsky.social · Sep 1

There was a little kid running down the hallway at the mall yelling “MY DAD IS A BOY MY DAD IS A BOY”

I can’t believe how young these kids are being indoctrinated by an agenda…

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Zach Funk @zachfunk.bsky.social · Aug 18

posting.pghcitypaper.com/pittsburgh/B...

Vote Funk! He’s been patched for the Y2K bug don’t worry.

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Zach Funk @zachfunk.bsky.social · Aug 16

Like this joke? Want more stuff like it?

Buy tickets to my Sept 6 album recording at mrsmalls.com/events/zach-...

Vote for me as best local comedian and Living to Laugh best charity event at posting.pghcitypaper.com/pittsburgh/B...

#standup #standupcomedians #standupcomedy #pittsburgh

Zach Funk @zachfunk.bsky.social · Aug 9

I’ve never liked the phrase “let Jesus take the wheel”.

Son of God or not the man likely never operated a steering wheel controlled vehicle in his life.

Or three days after his life for that matter.