I speak from experience telling yourself that "they don't really mean that" or "they've got a lot of trauma" as reasons to not speak up starts to warp your sense of self and values

Maybe they don't mean it
Maybe they do have a lot of trauma

But you still chose not to speak up for what you believe

Perpetual reminder that if you don't feel like you could gently tell a friend that you disagree with what they said or that you don't like what they did... They're not really your friend

No one is perfect AND we have to be careful about what we accept and allow from the people around us

Thank you Miss Major for sharing your beautiful and powerful life with us ❤️

I'll add that viewing any marginalized group as disposable or derogatorily for being true to themselves means you have at least one foundational core belief in common with our oppressors

They just include you and me as not worth showing empathy to as well

Oh look an example of the exact thing I was talking about earlier this morning

Advocacy not stemming from love and solidarity
But instead of hating men
Targeting a trans woman as if she is a traitor for being attracted to men

PSA
KAM as a warcry is by definition centering men

IMO a pattern that holds true is that when someone decides that a group doesn't deserve empathy they regardless of the situation will find a reason (even a seemingly compelling one!) to bring up that group and blame them

I think a lust for cruelty is kinda a red flag, no matter who it's pointed towards. Fights are necessary sometimes - often, even! But ideally, you're not *happy* that you're having to be harsh or even cruel - you're a bit horrified by it, necessary as it might be in a given situation.

I can't stand folks who just really, really enjoy cruelty. And it's not always obvious who this is - some people are very talented at picking targets that no one will stand up for, or that "have it coming," and we ignore the lust for cruelty because we see it as justified in those cases.

Learn how to self soothe your trauma responses and to ground yourself in your ethics and values. Hold yourself accountable when you inevitably fuck up (bc we all fuck up)

Empathy is not a sin
It is central to collective liberation

Solidarity and love
❤️

Which inherently limits our capacity to understand and unpack privilege and oppression bc we get stuck competing for who as an individual has it worse

Rather than using these terms and concepts as ways to describe systems of oppression so we can destroy the root causes of our suffering

More often than we are willing to recognize it is not clear cut that one group is more or less privileged. Often it is that two groups are differently privileged and differently oppressed

But our conversations about privilege tend to be centered around the idea that privilege is a rigid hierarchy

Most of the time we view what liberation is through the lens of our personal experiences which is inherently limiting and a huge part of the work of choosing love is recognizing that our personal bad experiences are not reasons to withhold care, empathy, and kindness to an entire marginalized group

Advocacy which is not born out of love and solidarity invariably leads people to turn on other marginalized groups, to construct rigid privilege hierarchies that don't hold space for the nuance of other group's oppression, and in the end to mimic the form of liberation without the substance

Not if the price is healthcare or freedoms. We want the shut down to end but how it ends is more important. We cannot allow trans or disabled Americans to be abandoned as the cost of negotiations. The corruption must stop and it starts with Democrats holding the line
A government FOR the people

I saw a recent headline
which announced
“Mask mandates return
in parts of the Bay Area
as virus season nears,”
and while I suppose
the return
of precautionary measures
is a good thing
I can’t help but think
that at this point
every season is virus season.

I played letroso.com 10/10/2025 and got it in 4 guesses.

🟩🟩⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛🟩⬛
⬛🟩⬛⬛🟩⬛🟢
🟢🟩🟩🟩⬛🟢
✅

Boooo! That's terrible and I'm sorry you have so many hurdles to your access. That really sucks my friend 🫂

So strange discord is a weird app that seems deeply broken on many levels

WTF? Omg friend I hope it gets sorted that is weird and awful 🫂

Y'all need to let it soak into your bones that this fight is necessary regardless of the probability of success

"We're cooked" is useless meaningless drivel

Yes connect people with resources so they can more easily leave

But giving up on those that stay especially bc the fight is hard is cowardly

Part of our collective responsibility in this moment is to uplift each other

Or at bare minimum not spread fear and misinformation

To stay kind with each other even as we hold our resolve against fascism

Part of genuinely making a better world is not becoming a selfish asshole while doing it

Doomerism continues to be an issue

And while I hear people's desire to express their fear and anger and depression

I also believe we are responsible for our impact on our community and the causes we care about

And using social media as a diary or a friend is often a selfish choice

(read full 🧵)

We usually talk about parasocial relationships from the perspective of a fan obsessing over a creator

But perhaps equally bad is a creator who uses their platform as a best friend, therapist, and diary

If you want endless uncritical validation for your feelings go talk to your BFF