Pinned
Like a Persian.
Selling rugs for the very first time....
Selling rugs for the very first time....
November 18, 2025 at 11:22 AM
Like a Persian.
Selling rugs for the very first time....
Selling rugs for the very first time....
Bringing my WIP Leicester Comedy Show to Plymouth on Thursday, tickets available below.
www.outsavvy.com/event/30456/...
www.outsavvy.com/event/30456/...
Comedy @ Union Corner: Alf “Goat Fridge” Tickets - Plymouth - OutSavvy
Next up at Union Corner is bonkers comic Alf performing his show “Goat Fridge”.Alf: A gloriously silly and hilarious one-liner prop comic. A multitude of achievements under his belt including: ‘So You...
www.outsavvy.com
October 27, 2025 at 8:05 PM
Bringing my WIP Leicester Comedy Show to Plymouth on Thursday, tickets available below.
www.outsavvy.com/event/30456/...
www.outsavvy.com/event/30456/...
It may be pronounced 'Milled Wholegrain Wheat' but it's actually spelt flour.
October 17, 2025 at 6:50 AM
It may be pronounced 'Milled Wholegrain Wheat' but it's actually spelt flour.
You may know me as the guy that pulls the ropes in your local church tower.
Ring any bells??
Ring any bells??
October 17, 2025 at 6:49 AM
You may know me as the guy that pulls the ropes in your local church tower.
Ring any bells??
Ring any bells??
October 16, 2025 at 6:33 AM
I've been in a very low place these last few weeks.
What can I say, there's nothing quit like a holiday in the Netherlands.
What can I say, there's nothing quit like a holiday in the Netherlands.
October 16, 2025 at 6:32 AM
I've been in a very low place these last few weeks.
What can I say, there's nothing quit like a holiday in the Netherlands.
What can I say, there's nothing quit like a holiday in the Netherlands.
I was actually raised behind bars.
My parents sure loved that pub.
My parents sure loved that pub.
October 16, 2025 at 6:31 AM
I was actually raised behind bars.
My parents sure loved that pub.
My parents sure loved that pub.
The recycling lorry has refused to take some of my props before.
This time, they're really taking the biscuit.
This time, they're really taking the biscuit.
October 15, 2025 at 7:23 AM
The recycling lorry has refused to take some of my props before.
This time, they're really taking the biscuit.
This time, they're really taking the biscuit.
It's a month since I released my hit song called 'The King of Prague'.
I should soon be getting a royalty Czech.
I should soon be getting a royalty Czech.
October 15, 2025 at 6:19 AM
It's a month since I released my hit song called 'The King of Prague'.
I should soon be getting a royalty Czech.
I should soon be getting a royalty Czech.
I know he's 86, but my granddad's always had the bones of a 20 year old.
Buried under his patio.
Buried under his patio.
October 15, 2025 at 6:02 AM
I know he's 86, but my granddad's always had the bones of a 20 year old.
Buried under his patio.
Buried under his patio.
Trying to check myself into a clinic for people who are sexually obsessed with Elton John.
The computer in reception has just asked me to 'Enter Reg'. ..
This isn't getting any easier.
The computer in reception has just asked me to 'Enter Reg'. ..
This isn't getting any easier.
October 1, 2025 at 6:47 AM
Trying to check myself into a clinic for people who are sexually obsessed with Elton John.
The computer in reception has just asked me to 'Enter Reg'. ..
This isn't getting any easier.
The computer in reception has just asked me to 'Enter Reg'. ..
This isn't getting any easier.
I'm currently reading a book called "Things they don't teach you at Harvard Business School".
It's mainly about Crochet.
It's mainly about Crochet.
October 1, 2025 at 6:47 AM
I'm currently reading a book called "Things they don't teach you at Harvard Business School".
It's mainly about Crochet.
It's mainly about Crochet.
I lost my Job with 'Mountain Rescue' for being too vague with directions, but that's neither here nor there.
September 24, 2025 at 4:16 PM
I lost my Job with 'Mountain Rescue' for being too vague with directions, but that's neither here nor there.
Had a nice time at the New Material night in Plymouth last night.
Here's a short snippet of some stuff I did.
Here's a short snippet of some stuff I did.
September 18, 2025 at 3:18 PM
Had a nice time at the New Material night in Plymouth last night.
Here's a short snippet of some stuff I did.
Here's a short snippet of some stuff I did.
You can take your euphemisms and stick them you-know-where.
July 26, 2025 at 10:52 AM
You can take your euphemisms and stick them you-know-where.
Just started trying to organise my 2nd Joke book. 😀
So far, I've done page 10.... that's it.
So far, I've done page 10.... that's it.
July 26, 2025 at 9:40 AM
Just started trying to organise my 2nd Joke book. 😀
So far, I've done page 10.... that's it.
So far, I've done page 10.... that's it.
Oooo what's this?? 😃
July 21, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Oooo what's this?? 😃
- Hello, i'd like to buy this 'Beginners Guide to Haggling', how much is it?
- That's £5.
- I'll give you £8
- Ok, then.
[Me, smuggly] - On second thoughts, I don't think i need this book afterall.
- That's £5.
- I'll give you £8
- Ok, then.
[Me, smuggly] - On second thoughts, I don't think i need this book afterall.
July 21, 2025 at 7:58 AM
- Hello, i'd like to buy this 'Beginners Guide to Haggling', how much is it?
- That's £5.
- I'll give you £8
- Ok, then.
[Me, smuggly] - On second thoughts, I don't think i need this book afterall.
- That's £5.
- I'll give you £8
- Ok, then.
[Me, smuggly] - On second thoughts, I don't think i need this book afterall.
I was once voted the World’s Worst Owl impersonator.
I couldn’t give two hoots.
I couldn’t give two hoots.
July 21, 2025 at 7:58 AM
I was once voted the World’s Worst Owl impersonator.
I couldn’t give two hoots.
I couldn’t give two hoots.
I was at the diarrhoea world championships and someone tried offering me performance enhancing laxatives, so I took one for the team.
July 9, 2025 at 6:30 PM
I was at the diarrhoea world championships and someone tried offering me performance enhancing laxatives, so I took one for the team.
Among the JFK files about the Assassination that Donald Trump released there was also a page from my next joke book.
Thankfully it seems to have been heavily redacted.
You sir have made yourself a very powerful enemy. 😡
Thankfully it seems to have been heavily redacted.
You sir have made yourself a very powerful enemy. 😡
March 19, 2025 at 11:58 PM
Among the JFK files about the Assassination that Donald Trump released there was also a page from my next joke book.
Thankfully it seems to have been heavily redacted.
You sir have made yourself a very powerful enemy. 😡
Thankfully it seems to have been heavily redacted.
You sir have made yourself a very powerful enemy. 😡
If i'm being completely honest, I have no idea what the term 'Plead Ignorance' means.
February 26, 2025 at 9:17 AM
If i'm being completely honest, I have no idea what the term 'Plead Ignorance' means.
Just got a job doing testing at the Rubik's Cube factory.
Well it's better than just sitting around twiddling my thumbs.
Well it's better than just sitting around twiddling my thumbs.
February 26, 2025 at 9:00 AM
Just got a job doing testing at the Rubik's Cube factory.
Well it's better than just sitting around twiddling my thumbs.
Well it's better than just sitting around twiddling my thumbs.
People often tell me i'm the most Sceptical person they've ever met, but I find that hard to believe.
February 24, 2025 at 9:17 AM
People often tell me i'm the most Sceptical person they've ever met, but I find that hard to believe.
You'll never guess who has just been arrested for smuggling gold leaf.
Gilty!!
Gilty!!
February 24, 2025 at 9:16 AM
You'll never guess who has just been arrested for smuggling gold leaf.
Gilty!!
Gilty!!