Whack Morris
@whackmorris.bsky.social
480 followers 190 following 1.9K posts
Now enjoy my garbage to mediocre content on Bluesky!
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whackmorris.bsky.social
In 1987 my friends and I were playing basketball at the neighborhood court when the bullies who kick our asses showed up, but I was wearing my brand new Nike Air Force 2s my grandma bought for me that afternoon and I jumped away over a building like the Incredible Hulk to escape.
whackmorris.bsky.social
That’s what I mean when I say the good old days.
whackmorris.bsky.social
Let it flow, let yourself go
Slowen Lo, that is the tempo
whackmorris.bsky.social
I hope some people start to see the light soon, but I’m preparing for the worst.
whackmorris.bsky.social
I hope these fucks get prosecuted after all this shit is done. There’s actually been some major pushback here. I’m still worried how far this will all go, but it seems like there are cracks starting to form. Nothing’s cheaper, people are losing benefits, they’re businesses.
whackmorris.bsky.social
Asking if I can park it in her pussy garage because my dick actually looks like tiny 18 wheeler.
whackmorris.bsky.social
They’re all scumbag fascists. Shit’s bad in areas near me.
whackmorris.bsky.social
Someone dropped their merkin.
whackmorris.bsky.social
I still remember my grandparents phone number. First number I memorized. I have probably a dozen out defunct phone numbers in my brain.
whackmorris.bsky.social
Quoth the raven “dirty whore”
whackmorris.bsky.social
Cool buttplug I scored on Facebook marketplace.
whackmorris.bsky.social
A couple years ago they changed the name of the neighborhood elementary school from Christopher Columbus to Ruth Bader Ginsburg. The only people upset about this were the Italians. They live in completely different part of the city.
whackmorris.bsky.social
Need a girl that will do OnlyFans with me. Would be nice to make a living just fucking.
whackmorris.bsky.social
On a scale of 1 to 10 how likely are you to complete a feedback survey?
whackmorris.bsky.social
Today the inventor of the Chicken Nibbler, Harold C. Chicken, died today. It’s unclear what he actually invented.
whackmorris.bsky.social
Don’t just suck it. Slorp™ it.
whackmorris.bsky.social
Gonna start talking to all MAGA supporters like Moe from the Three Stooges.

“What’s a matter witchu, dum-dum?”

“Knock it off, ya numbskull!”
whackmorris.bsky.social
Swifties when you force them to listen to Autechre at gun point.
whackmorris.bsky.social
Smoking boiled eggs out of a giant hookah with a man with a seven foot wide mustache.
whackmorris.bsky.social
Every time I hear the phrase “Cram in in yer ass, Mack.” I think of my grandpa.