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Virgin Monk Boy

@virginmonkboy.bsky.social

610 followers 2.2K following 630 posts

🔮 Patron Saint Against Christian Nationalism, appointed by Mary Magdalene. Roasting fascists, blessing heretics, and breaking spells since forever. Subscribe to my Substack https://www.virginmonkboy.com/subscribe

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Virgin Monk Boy @virginmonkboy.bsky.social · Jun 9

Latest version of the Victory Over Christian Nationalism meme card is out.
Print, fold on the guide line, stick it in your church bulletin. Tape on your pastor’s SUV.
We uproot lies by spreading truth.
#ChristianNationalism #Deconstruction #PublicTheology #Exvangelical #SpiritualNotReligious

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Virgin Monk Boy @virginmonkboy.bsky.social · 10h

The slogan says “make worship great again.”
But God never needed a campaign manager.
Heaven is not nostalgic for 1954.
You cannot legislate revival.
Faith is not a platform plank.
Magdalene’s gospel still outpolls fear.
Blessed be the ones who campaign for compassion.

Virgin Monk Boy @virginmonkboy.bsky.social · 11h

It’s Tuesday late afternoon. The light turns honey-soft, and your body tells the truth.
Not everything needs your grasp to keep from falling.
Magdalene knew better than to hold on past peace.
If your only miracle is ending before you unravel, it counts. 🌇

Virgin Monk Boy @virginmonkboy.bsky.social · 15h

It’s Tuesday noon. The light is steady and the world impatient.
Not everything sacred arrives with purpose.
Magdalene knew better than to rush revelation. She lingered in the quiet.
If your only miracle today is pausing without guilt, it counts. 🌞

Virgin Monk Boy @virginmonkboy.bsky.social · 16h

The Bible app adds streaks like Snapchat.
Apparently grace expires after 24 hours.
Holiness is not a gamified habit.
God does not count consecutive logins.
Love does not keep score.
Magdalene’s devotion never needed an update.
Blessed be the ones who stay logged into love.

Virgin Monk Boy @virginmonkboy.bsky.social · 16h

The Nephilim weren’t mutant hybrids or ancient villains. They were humanity’s first lesson in projection—how fear turns mystery into monsters.

Read the full scroll: virginmonkboy.substack.com/p/the-nephil...

#VirginMonkBoy #GospelOfMary #MysticHumor

The Nephilim Revisited: Contact, Not Contamination

What if the Nephilim story wasn’t about corruption but evolution, not infiltration but awakening through human consciousness.

virginmonkboy.substack.com

Virgin Monk Boy @virginmonkboy.bsky.social · 17h

Infomercial: GI Bill Seminary — get educated and tithed at the same time. Fully “military-blessed” accreditation, 100% divine bureaucracy. 🎓💰

www.virginmonkboy.com/p/infomercia...

#VirginMonkBoy #Satire #ChurchOfCapitalism #HolyGrift #FaithBasedFunding

Infomercial: GI Bill Seminary — Get Educated and Tithes!

Ever wondered what happens when the prosperity gospel meets the Pentagon? GI Bill Seminary turns your veteran benefits into holy revenue streams, promising “full military-blessed accreditation” and a ...

www.virginmonkboy.com

Virgin Monk Boy @virginmonkboy.bsky.social · 1d

It’s Monday evening. The work is behind you, but its weight still hums in your bones.
Not everything needs to be tied up before rest.
Magdalene trusted love to finish what her hands could not.
If your only miracle is setting the day down, it counts. 🌆

Virgin Monk Boy @virginmonkboy.bsky.social · 1d

The prophecy conference sells tickets.
Revelation takes PayPal now.
If you can Venmo your way to wisdom, it’s fake.
The Spirit doesn’t do VIP seating.
Truth doesn’t need QR codes.
Magdalene got hers for free and passed it on.
Blessed be the ones who give grace away.

Virgin Monk Boy @virginmonkboy.bsky.social · 1d

The mission trip advertises “changing lives.”
Mostly their own Instagram feeds.
Poverty tourism is not discipleship.
Love does not need selfies.
Service without follow-up is theater.
Magdalene washed feet without witnesses.
Blessed be the ones who help and hush.

Virgin Monk Boy @virginmonkboy.bsky.social · 1d

The committee says “dress modestly.”
But only polices women.
Lust management is a personal project.
Fabric cannot save souls.
The holy are clothed in empathy, not hem lengths.
Magdalene wore courage and compassion.
Blessed be the ones who cover others with kindness.

Virgin Monk Boy @virginmonkboy.bsky.social · 1d

Some still claim the Nephilim walk among us—fallen-angel bloodlines running the world from behind glowing screens.

Turns out the real monsters aren’t giants. They’re our old habits of fear.

Read: www.virginmonkboy.com/p/the-ancien...

#Nephilim #ConspiracyTheories #SpiritualSatire #VirginMonkBoy

The Ancient Conspiracy That Refuses to Die

The Nephilim myth claims fallen-angel hybrids still walk among us. This essay exposes its origins, modern revival, and the fear that keeps it alive.

www.virginmonkboy.com

Virgin Monk Boy @virginmonkboy.bsky.social · 1d

It’s Monday morning. The world is loud, and your spirit still half-asleep in grace.
Not everything needs to start with energy.
Magdalene rose slowly and trusted love to move first.
If your only miracle today is showing up gently, it counts. 🌅

Virgin Monk Boy @virginmonkboy.bsky.social · 2d

It’s Sunday late afternoon. The light softens, and so do you.
Not everything needs to be finished before you exhale.
Magdalene knew better than to outrun the dusk. She let the light dim on her terms.
If your only miracle is calling it enough, it counts. 🌇

Virgin Monk Boy @virginmonkboy.bsky.social · 2d

The pastor tweets “church isn’t perfect.”
But perfection was never the goal.
Honesty was.
Repentance still outranks rebranding.
Grace grows better in cracked soil.
Magdalene bloomed there first.
Blessed be the ones who admit the mess.

Virgin Monk Boy @virginmonkboy.bsky.social · 2d

It’s Sunday midmorning. The light is soft and unhurried.
Not everything sacred requires striving.
Magdalene knew better than to chase revelation. She stayed still until truth spoke her name.
If your only miracle today is peace, it counts. ☀️

Virgin Monk Boy @virginmonkboy.bsky.social · 3d

It’s Saturday dusk. The sky softens and the world exhales.
Not everything needs reflection or closure.
Magdalene knew better than to analyze peace. She let rest arrive uninvited.
If your only miracle tonight is letting enough be enough, it counts. 🌆

Virgin Monk Boy @virginmonkboy.bsky.social · 3d

It’s Saturday noon. The lists can wait. You’re allowed to call this holy.
Magdalene knew better than to sanctify exhaustion. She paused in the warmth and let peace do the work her will could not.
If your only miracle today is resting without guilt, it counts. 🌞

Virgin Monk Boy @virginmonkboy.bsky.social · 3d

“Pillow prayer” feels like the perfect symbol for where American Christianity is headed. All fluff, no structure, and nobody willing to wake up. The saints must be up there shaking their heads into the clouds, whispering, “Lord, give them better pillows and better prophets.”

Christian Nightmares @christiannightmare.bsky.social · 5d

Since the Pentagon recently announced that it's replacing The New York Times' press credentials with the MyPillow CEO's media outlet, it seems like a good time to repost this video of Mike Lindell leading a stadium full of people in pillow prayer...

Virgin Monk Boy @virginmonkboy.bsky.social · 3d

The megachurch says “we’re non-denominational.”
Which usually means “we’re our own denomination.”
Unity looks good until the merch drops.
Transparency ends where tithes begin.
Faith does not need a franchise model.
Magdalene built community, not campuses.
Blessed be the ones who gather without logos

Virgin Monk Boy @virginmonkboy.bsky.social · 4d

The prayer request says “unspoken.”
Which is code for gossip with privacy settings.
Confession without context is suspense theater.
God already knows; the audience does not need to.
Faith does not need cliffhangers.
Magdalene told the truth out loud.
Blessed be the ones who speak without spectacle.

Virgin Monk Boy @virginmonkboy.bsky.social · 4d

It’s Friday noon and your to-do list has turned into confession.
Not everything needs to be wrapped before the week exhales.
If your only miracle today is stopping before you’re spent, it counts.

#SacredRest #HolyEnoughness

Virgin Monk Boy @virginmonkboy.bsky.social · 4d

The radio host yells “America needs revival.”
Translation: ratings are down.
You cannot preach resurrection for ad revenue.
Faith does not fit between commercials.
Grace does not need sponsors.
Magdalene started the first revival barefoot in the dark.
Blessed be the ones who spark hope for free.

Virgin Monk Boy @virginmonkboy.bsky.social · 4d

🌅Not everything needs to build.
Some hours are for winding down while you begin.

If your only miracle this morning is beginning gently instead of bravely, it counts.

#VirginMonkBoy #SacredPacing #HolyStart

Virgin Monk Boy @virginmonkboy.bsky.social · 5d

The small group brags “we’re doing life together.”
But forgets each other’s birthdays.
Community isn’t coffee once a month.
It’s casseroles at funerals.
It’s rides to rehab and rent money under doors.
Magdalene built that kind of church.
Blessed be the ones who actually show up.

Virgin Monk Boy @virginmonkboy.bsky.social · 5d

The slogan says “purity is power.”
But shame is the actual product.
If holiness needs a promise ring, it is marketing.
Bodies were never the enemy.
Desire does not disqualify devotion.
Mary Magdalene’s love outlived death itself.
Blessed be the ones who stop policing skin.