Toby 🇵🇸
@tobestewart.bsky.social
Somethng s mssng from your lfe
bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaajpevonw36e
bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaajpevonw36e
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Toby 🇵🇸
@tobestewart.bsky.social
· Nov 21
If this app doesn’t work I’m going back to ruining my life locally
I’m an empathetic and considerate man. Nobody knows what to do with me
November 29, 2025 at 9:25 PM
I’m an empathetic and considerate man. Nobody knows what to do with me
One great way to start a conversation with a stranger is to tell them about my Bluesky account
November 29, 2025 at 9:23 PM
One great way to start a conversation with a stranger is to tell them about my Bluesky account
The problem with many hobbies is they’re a way to meet people
November 29, 2025 at 9:14 PM
The problem with many hobbies is they’re a way to meet people
[*counting my notification*]
“It’s lonely at the top”
“It’s lonely at the top”
November 29, 2025 at 9:35 AM
[*counting my notification*]
“It’s lonely at the top”
“It’s lonely at the top”
We’re on a gigantic spinning ball of rock hurtling through infinite space and you want me to go outside?
November 29, 2025 at 8:47 AM
We’re on a gigantic spinning ball of rock hurtling through infinite space and you want me to go outside?
The best thing about being an atheist is doing all your own smiting
November 29, 2025 at 8:41 AM
The best thing about being an atheist is doing all your own smiting
If I have a funny walk, it’s because I’ve been fucking the police. What was I thinking?
November 29, 2025 at 8:35 AM
If I have a funny walk, it’s because I’ve been fucking the police. What was I thinking?
[just back from Damascus]
“Yo! Saul! Long time no see”
— “It’s ‘Paul’ now”
“Say wha-“
— “Let me tell you about Jepup”
“Yo! Saul! Long time no see”
— “It’s ‘Paul’ now”
“Say wha-“
— “Let me tell you about Jepup”
November 28, 2025 at 8:00 PM
[just back from Damascus]
“Yo! Saul! Long time no see”
— “It’s ‘Paul’ now”
“Say wha-“
— “Let me tell you about Jepup”
“Yo! Saul! Long time no see”
— “It’s ‘Paul’ now”
“Say wha-“
— “Let me tell you about Jepup”
If you see me giving out high-fives, it means I’ve remembered not to say something stupid
November 28, 2025 at 5:51 AM
If you see me giving out high-fives, it means I’ve remembered not to say something stupid
If someone tells you they love you, always say “thank you”
November 28, 2025 at 5:48 AM
If someone tells you they love you, always say “thank you”
As a single man, I have no way of knowing how wrong I am
November 27, 2025 at 5:02 PM
As a single man, I have no way of knowing how wrong I am
You people don’t deserve me. You’ve done nothing wrong
November 27, 2025 at 4:48 PM
You people don’t deserve me. You’ve done nothing wrong
I see you're “proudly” patriotic? Well done for being born in a country
November 27, 2025 at 8:17 AM
I see you're “proudly” patriotic? Well done for being born in a country
Reposted by Toby 🇵🇸
Imagine finding out immigrants aren’t the reason for everything that’s wrong with your life after all and you’re just a piece of shit
November 25, 2025 at 5:36 PM
Imagine finding out immigrants aren’t the reason for everything that’s wrong with your life after all and you’re just a piece of shit
It’s Monday morning and I’m in an awkward stand-off with reality
November 24, 2025 at 7:46 AM
It’s Monday morning and I’m in an awkward stand-off with reality
Critics accusing me of being a hopeless romantic can just sweep me off my feet and kiss me passionately
November 23, 2025 at 6:07 PM
Critics accusing me of being a hopeless romantic can just sweep me off my feet and kiss me passionately
When He said “Let there be light” who was He talking to?
November 23, 2025 at 6:27 AM
When He said “Let there be light” who was He talking to?
When I whispered in her ear, “You’re the only woman I think about”, I should’ve mentioned all the men
November 23, 2025 at 6:23 AM
When I whispered in her ear, “You’re the only woman I think about”, I should’ve mentioned all the men
When I said “Get Well Soon”, I meant, “Suffer A Little Longer”
November 23, 2025 at 6:19 AM
When I said “Get Well Soon”, I meant, “Suffer A Little Longer”
Coincidences are weird! That’s the fourth bar of soap to hit me today
November 22, 2025 at 2:14 PM
Coincidences are weird! That’s the fourth bar of soap to hit me today
“Let me count the ways I love you”, she said, introducing the concept of negative numbers
November 22, 2025 at 2:14 PM
“Let me count the ways I love you”, she said, introducing the concept of negative numbers
“Try to be more socially interactive”, they said
“Engage with the wider community”, they said
“You have the right to remain silent”, they said
“Engage with the wider community”, they said
“You have the right to remain silent”, they said
November 22, 2025 at 9:14 AM
“Try to be more socially interactive”, they said
“Engage with the wider community”, they said
“You have the right to remain silent”, they said
“Engage with the wider community”, they said
“You have the right to remain silent”, they said
This largely ignored social-media post is for everyone who said I’d never amount to anything
November 22, 2025 at 9:12 AM
This largely ignored social-media post is for everyone who said I’d never amount to anything
NOW she's annoyed because I said my next girlfriend will be real
November 21, 2025 at 7:01 AM
NOW she's annoyed because I said my next girlfriend will be real
“Waiter!”
- “Sir?”
“This water?”
- “Sir?”
“My date-I SAID I’LL HANDLE IT-My date says it’s MILLIONS of years old”
- “Sir?”
“This water?”
- “Sir?”
“My date-I SAID I’LL HANDLE IT-My date says it’s MILLIONS of years old”
November 21, 2025 at 6:58 AM
“Waiter!”
- “Sir?”
“This water?”
- “Sir?”
“My date-I SAID I’LL HANDLE IT-My date says it’s MILLIONS of years old”
- “Sir?”
“This water?”
- “Sir?”
“My date-I SAID I’LL HANDLE IT-My date says it’s MILLIONS of years old”