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Rincewind @therincewind.bsky.social · Jun 25

“We're really good at it, Teppic thought. Mere animals couldn't possibly manage to act like this. You need to be a human being to be really stupid.”

#Pyramids
#Discworld
#Pratchett

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Rincewind @therincewind.bsky.social · Jun 24

“Have - have you got an appointment?' he said.
'I don't know,' said Carrot. 'Have we got an appointment?'
'I've got an iron ball with spikes on,' Nobby volunteered.
'That's a morningstar, Nobby.'
'Is it?'

#MenAtArms
#Discworld
#Pratchett

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Rincewind @therincewind.bsky.social · Jun 23

“Do you realise that we are probably seeing something that nobody has seen for centuries?"

"Yes its a bloody flying alligator setting fire to my city!”

#GuardsGuards
#Discworld
#Pratchett

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Rincewind @therincewind.bsky.social · Jun 22

It’s not that he doesn’t appreciate beauty, he just appreciates it in his own way. I mean, if a poet sees a daffodil he stares at it and writes a long poem about it, but Twoflower wanders off to find a book on botany. He just looks at things, but nothing he looks at is ever the same again.

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Rincewind @therincewind.bsky.social · Jun 21

“HAVE YOU EVER BITTEN REDHOT ICE CUBE? THAT'S CURRY.”

#Discworld
#Mort
#Pratchett

Rincewind @therincewind.bsky.social · Jun 20

“I just think the world ought to be more sort of organized.'
'That's just fantasy,' said Twoflower.
'I know. That's the trouble.' Rincewind sighed again.”

#Discworld
#ColorOfMagic
#Pratchett

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Rincewind @therincewind.bsky.social · Jun 19

“Vimes woke in damp and utter darkness with sand under his cheek. Some parts of his body reported for duty, others protested that they had a note from their mother.”

#Discworld
#Snuff
#Pratchett

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Rincewind @therincewind.bsky.social · Jun 18

“Colon looked awkward, as if the bunched underwear of the past was tangling itself in the crotch of recollection.”

#Discworld
#Jingo
#Pratchett

Rincewind @therincewind.bsky.social · Jun 17

“The horsemen came closer.

Vimes was not good at horsemen. Something in him resented being addressed by anyone eight feet above the ground. He didn't like the sensation of being looked at by nostrils.”

#Discworld
#NightWatch
#Pratchett

Rincewind @therincewind.bsky.social · Jun 16

“The Great God Om waxed wroth, or at least made a spirited attempt. There is a limit to the amount of wroth that can be waxed one inch from the ground, and he was right up against it.”

#Discworld
#SmallGods
#Pratchett

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Rincewind @therincewind.bsky.social · May 25

“If you invited a hedge wizard to a party, he would spend half the evening talking to your potted plant. And he would spend the other half listening.”

#Equal Rites
#Discworld
#Pratchett

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Rincewind @therincewind.bsky.social · May 24

"Guild member?"

"Not any more, sir."

"Oh? How did you leave the guild?"

"Through the roof, sir. But I'm pretty certain I know what I did wrong.”

#Feet of Clay
#Discworld
#Pratchett

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Rincewind @therincewind.bsky.social · May 23

“There are eight levels of wizardry on the Disc; after sixteen years Rincewind has failed to achieve even level one. In fact it is considered opinion of some of his tutors that he is incapable even of achieving level zero, which most normal people are born at."

#Sourcery
#Discworld
#Pratchett

Rincewind @therincewind.bsky.social · May 22

“Many things went on at Unseen University and, regrettably, teaching had to be one of them. The faculty had long ago confronted this fact and had perfected various devices for avoiding it. But this was perfectly all right because, to be fair, so had the students.”

#Interesting Times
#Discworld

Rincewind @therincewind.bsky.social · May 21

“I believe in reincarnation,” [Bjorn] said.
I KNOW.
“I tried to live a good life. Does that help?”
THAT’S NOT UP TO ME. Death coughed. OF COURSE... SINCE YOU BELIEVE IN REINCARNATION... YOU’LL BE BJORN AGAIN.”

#ManAtArms
#Discworld
#Pratchett

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Rincewind @therincewind.bsky.social · May 20

“It would seem that you have no useful skill or talent whatsoever," he said. "Have you thought of going into teaching?”

#Mort
#Discworld
#Pratchett

Rincewind @therincewind.bsky.social · Mar 31

YOU WILL NOT TELL THE RIVERS NOT TO FLOW. YOU WILL NOT TELL THE SUN NOT TO SHINE. YOU WILL NOT TELL ME WHAT I SHOULD AND SHOULD NOT DO.

#Discworld
#ThiefOfTime
#Pratchett

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Rincewind @therincewind.bsky.social · Mar 30

In a distant nd 2nd hand set of dimensions, in an astral plane that was never meant to fly, the curling star-mists waver and part
Great A’Tuin the turtle comes, swimming slowly through the interstellar gulf, hydrogen frost on his ponderous limbs, his huge and ancient shell pocked with meteor craters

Rincewind @therincewind.bsky.social · Mar 29

What a place! What a situation! What kind of man would put a known criminal in charge of a major branch of government? Apart from, say, the average voter.

#Discworld
#GoingPostal
#Pratchett

Rincewind @therincewind.bsky.social · Mar 28

“Silverfish looked down.
"Oh. Are you a dwarf?"
Cuddy gave him a blank stare.
"Are you a giant?" He said.
"Me? Of course not!"
"Ah. Then I must be a dwarf, yes.”

#Discworld
#MenAtArms
#Pratchett

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Rincewind @therincewind.bsky.social · Mar 27

Any adventurous sailor who got funny ideas from staring at eggs and oranges soon learned that the reason why distant ships sometimes looked as though they were disappearing over the edge of the world was that they were disappearing over the edge of the world.

#Discworld
#LightFantastic
#Pratchett

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Rincewind @therincewind.bsky.social · Mar 26

You can't give her that!' she screamed. 'It's not safe!'

IT'S A SWORD, said the Hogfather. THEY'RE NOT MEANT TO BE SAFE.

'She's a child!' shouted Crumley.

IT'S EDUCATIONAL.

'What if she cuts herself?'

THAT WILL BE AN IMPORTANT LESSON.

#Discworld
#Hogfather
#Pratchett

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Rincewind @therincewind.bsky.social · Mar 25

“It would seem that you have no useful skill or talent whatsoever," he said.

"Have you thought of going into teaching?”

#Discworld
#Mort
#Pratchett

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Rincewind @therincewind.bsky.social · Mar 24

He always held that panic was the best means of survival; back in the olden days, his theory went, people faced with hungry saber-toothed tigers could be divided very simply into those who panicked and those who stood there saying
“What a magnificent brute!” and “Here, pussy.”

#Discworld

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Reposted by Rincewind

Rincewind @therincewind.bsky.social · Mar 23

He hated weapons, and not just because they'd so often been aimed at him. You got into more trouble if you had a weapon. People shot you instantly if they thought you were going to shoot them.

#Rincewind
#LastContinent
#Discworld
#Pratchett

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