Author | Lightnews

Simon T Wolf

@simontwolf.bsky.social

140 followers 80 following 1.3K posts

Cis: he/him/his, gay, HIV+, Out, Loud & Proud, living on Wadda warrung country in Naarm; Gondwana. This is an autobiography of sorts...

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Simon T Wolf @simontwolf.bsky.social · Dec 15

(bio ext.) Dad taught Science, built Deakin University while Mum was a nurse. I learned everything I needed to know to have a successful experience before Secondary School and went on to be a successful practitioner of my trade as a Barman, Waiter and eventually Chef as I worked my way up my own tbc

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Simon T Wolf @simontwolf.bsky.social · 9h

I watched #TheWitcher during a relationship built upon a habit and the desperate desire to not be alone when you're at the bottom of the barrel yourself. With the new season, in going to do it the honour of watching the 3 prior seasons and the 3 spin offs in a proper state of mind.

Simon T Wolf @simontwolf.bsky.social · 12h

To the best of my recollection, #Drumpf only ever looks "sure" of himself when he's got that fake smile plastered on; every candid shot I've seen of him shows a weak and unsure child struggling to fit in to the world of the responsible, hence his authoritarian bend: it's also the little dick thing.

Simon T Wolf @simontwolf.bsky.social · 13h

I'm looking forward to #Google rolling #ChromeOS and #Android into a single operating system and then deploying it onto my two main PC's. I bought a #Lenovo 11" tablet running Android to replace an aged 10" Asus #Chromebook.

Bonus: the Home application voice control via #Bluetooth5.4 mic to pc

Simon T Wolf @simontwolf.bsky.social · 14h

Letter to the Manufacturer, re: human anatomy; sub: spinal column, vertebrae, discs, facets and supporting musculature

Dear Sir/Madam/Thing From Another Dimension,
WHAT IN BLAZES WERE YOU THINKING PUTTING ALL THAT IMPORTANT WIRING THROUGH A KEY SUPPORT STRUCTURE LIKE THAT?
Sheesh.
#career-damage

Simon T Wolf @simontwolf.bsky.social · 18h

#HMKingCharlesIII has acted with finality...finally.
Now he is just Andrew, no longer Royal; Beatrice and Eugénie retain their titles, but the news (personally) is the destruction of the House of York. Its standing in the Peerage of Nobles has been made defunct. #Downfall.
youtu.be/4CAbxsiX5ow?...

King Charles to strip Andrew of royal titles, residence: Buckingham Palace • FRANCE 24 English

YouTube video by FRANCE 24 English

youtu.be

Simon T Wolf @simontwolf.bsky.social · 2d

Putting insomnia to good use: catch up on all those series that you've missed...like #The-Mandalorian, I put it off and now that there is more coming I decided that this was the way. #Star-Wars has been part of my world since A New Hope premiered and I became a Jedi like every one else.

Simon T Wolf @simontwolf.bsky.social · 4d

Testosterone is vital to men's mental health, and I've found that combined with CBT, I've got a handle on the depression I live with. I've tried medications to handle it but found them so debilitating - especially sexual dysfunction - that I chose not to medicate but to meditate... and consume pot.

Simon T Wolf @simontwolf.bsky.social · 4d

... hormones control all of our cycles and even there I'm on Hormone Replacement Therapy due to andropause. Normally it is only a medical condition that induces "the change" in men but it happens. There's no hot flushes but the mood swings can be... I think some female readers will know what I mean.

Simon T Wolf @simontwolf.bsky.social · 4d

ten in any shift, coz I love coffee, and I might have had 4 more during an early evening; knowing I would be out until 6 or 7 am the next morning.

So I try not to focus on the insomnia itself - down that path lays darkness and madness as you fight only yourself in a battle you will lose. Our...

Simon T Wolf @simontwolf.bsky.social · 4d

... suburban street as a major thoroughfare, I call it "Flinders St about 3pm" .

Some mornings I'll snooze for 90 minute periods: if I get 3 of those, I call it a night's sleep.

My Doc used to ask if it was coffee. I might have 1 on any day, which is always before 2pm; years ago that could be

Simon T Wolf @simontwolf.bsky.social · 4d

There comes a point on any night during an insomnia bout, usually around 5.30 am, that I give up on the idea of sleep. I'll stay in bed until around 11.30 am.; usually trying to get back to sleep hoping for almost any amount of shut eye, but only after about 2 hours of the morning rush uses my...

Simon T Wolf @simontwolf.bsky.social · 5d

more integrated circuits; that kept the wiring down to a nightmare instead of hell in high heels and going backwards.

So those stories like Límony Snicket's (spelling?) or that pig tail thing with the stripes... whats-her-name... and especially the television references... totally lost on me...

Simon T Wolf @simontwolf.bsky.social · 5d

another 2 years to acquire their first PC, an Apple IIe.

It was fun taking stuff apart and reassembling it but my favourites were always the stuff Dad and I worked on together; like his MOOG Synthesiser: again from the breadboarded up with the bits and pieces except this time there were a shitload

Simon T Wolf @simontwolf.bsky.social · 5d

For my 10th birthday he bought all the parts and instructions to build Pong, the world's first digital game, from the breadboard up. At 12 I was programming in BASIC on the IBM PC Clone that he and others at The Tech, had built. For me. To learn programming on.

It took the High School I was at

Simon T Wolf @simontwolf.bsky.social · 5d

... reconditioned/machined/remade all the bits with the help of Lindsay from next door who was a mechanic, so between them my dad and he, with me holding tools and bits and using my small hands to do the really fiddly bits, rebuilt the engine and gearbox back to near-new condition when I was nine.

Simon T Wolf @simontwolf.bsky.social · 5d

eight years of age, considering the jokes in Blazing Saddles that went over mums head that both dad and I got - she was distracted by Anthony - hadn't mentioned little brother yet had I...

The year before.

Back to me.

My father and I:
- took the engine out of his Renault 10, stripped it ...

Simon T Wolf @simontwolf.bsky.social · 5d

mother is a nurse on her way to becoming Matron (back then that was THE job at the top in a hospital for women) and all their friends were also educated, middle-upper crust über professionals, the conversation trends to the weighty for a "child" to hear (my father stopped considering me a child at

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Simon T Wolf @simontwolf.bsky.social · 5d

as well as Stoker's Dracula. While everyone else in my year level was being read "The Hobbit" by the Librarian (this was a class), I'd already finished that, all of the Rings trilogy and was starting on The Silmarillion, by the end of that year.

When you're father is a teacher of sciences and your

Simon T Wolf @simontwolf.bsky.social · 5d

I don't.

I didn't need to have them read to me. For my 5th birthday I was given a compendium of Jules Verne's works and Dafoe's Gulliver's Travels and a work by female author, Mary Shelley, Frankenstein. On my 6th birthday I was given the complete works of Shakespeare and also of Edgar Allen Poe

Simon T Wolf @simontwolf.bsky.social · 5d

Having epiphanies and going through long-term psychological traumatic catharsis as you round on your 60th birthday can be surprising. This one is a real doozy though...

Do you remember your parents reading fairy tales or the Brothers Grimm's stories or, perchance, tales of terror and suspense?

?

Simon T Wolf @simontwolf.bsky.social · 6d

We'll explore the stars.

Simon T Wolf @simontwolf.bsky.social · 6d

and don't believe you or anyone else had a right to it; let alone they want a claim on yours to prop up their pathetic excuses for wasting our oxygen.

The point isn't about getting revenge, or getting even...

It's leaving them to their shitty little piles of sand...

Let them fight in the dirt.

Simon T Wolf @simontwolf.bsky.social · 6d

through jumbled thoughts, restless dreams you've walked alone and across landscapes of fantasy you created as havens to retreat into when the darkness threatened to envelop you.

It's now you realise that the darkness will always be there to threaten your peace,; people are jealous of your peace

Simon T Wolf @simontwolf.bsky.social · 6d

meditative practice built... the wail of defeat in recognition as the flood of pain over tops the dykes and comes crashing into present reality with a needle point that instantly envelopes you entirely.

The despair at the bottom of this pit feels like it will never be extinguished.

You scramble

Simon T Wolf @simontwolf.bsky.social · 6d

...on a few occasions.

That's just the beginning.

...like a hurricane from out of nowhere, the storm screams down a backcountry channel through the endless inner recesses of your mind, picking up force as its power enters consciousness; breaking through the ramparts of defence that decades of...