The Swan
@shoelessjeff.bsky.social
Currently taking the shape of a swan on a lake.
Posts are presented as parody.
No shoes, please.
Posts are presented as parody.
No shoes, please.
Pinned
The Swan is on Holiday Break until Episode 2026.
Time to reflect, collect and recharge for what's NeXt.
2026: Olympics - World Cup - La Nina - The Upside Down - Weak Diplomacy - Floods - Old Timey Health Care - and More!
Time to reflect, collect and recharge for what's NeXt.
2026: Olympics - World Cup - La Nina - The Upside Down - Weak Diplomacy - Floods - Old Timey Health Care - and More!
The Swan is on Holiday Break until Episode 2026.
Time to reflect, collect and recharge for what's NeXt.
2026: Olympics - World Cup - La Nina - The Upside Down - Weak Diplomacy - Floods - Old Timey Health Care - and More!
Time to reflect, collect and recharge for what's NeXt.
2026: Olympics - World Cup - La Nina - The Upside Down - Weak Diplomacy - Floods - Old Timey Health Care - and More!
December 20, 2025 at 1:43 PM
The Swan is on Holiday Break until Episode 2026.
Time to reflect, collect and recharge for what's NeXt.
2026: Olympics - World Cup - La Nina - The Upside Down - Weak Diplomacy - Floods - Old Timey Health Care - and More!
Time to reflect, collect and recharge for what's NeXt.
2026: Olympics - World Cup - La Nina - The Upside Down - Weak Diplomacy - Floods - Old Timey Health Care - and More!
Mema Still Dropping "Time to Sleigh!" on Personal Gift Checks
December 19, 2025 at 11:24 PM
Mema Still Dropping "Time to Sleigh!" on Personal Gift Checks
Stay Tuned for our exclusive AMA with Jake Sully, as he trains for the Oscars in a heated pool
December 19, 2025 at 9:45 PM
Stay Tuned for our exclusive AMA with Jake Sully, as he trains for the Oscars in a heated pool
Weekend: Young Professionals Rally to Boost Struggling Economy
December 19, 2025 at 9:41 PM
Weekend: Young Professionals Rally to Boost Struggling Economy
Topical: Marijuana Downgraded From Schedule I to Schedule III
"All good, my schedule is always open for Aunt Mary."
"All good, my schedule is always open for Aunt Mary."
December 19, 2025 at 4:58 PM
Topical: Marijuana Downgraded From Schedule I to Schedule III
"All good, my schedule is always open for Aunt Mary."
"All good, my schedule is always open for Aunt Mary."
PSR J2322-2650b Wins Planet of the Year
December 19, 2025 at 4:46 PM
PSR J2322-2650b Wins Planet of the Year
Sporting Opinion: Why The NFL Should Move to a 'World-Flag Football' Playoff Format
December 18, 2025 at 3:27 PM
Sporting Opinion: Why The NFL Should Move to a 'World-Flag Football' Playoff Format
President Announces America's Comeback, From It's Total Big-time Failure Since 1776
December 18, 2025 at 2:21 AM
President Announces America's Comeback, From It's Total Big-time Failure Since 1776
Breaking: Trader Joe's Loses Team Member to Torn ACL, Cullen is Out for Rest of Season
December 16, 2025 at 7:38 PM
Breaking: Trader Joe's Loses Team Member to Torn ACL, Cullen is Out for Rest of Season
Connections: Tree Farm Date Might End With Hot Chocolate
December 16, 2025 at 6:43 PM
Connections: Tree Farm Date Might End With Hot Chocolate
King Charles III Announces He Is Still Alive, From What One Hears During Crumpets
December 13, 2025 at 11:33 PM
King Charles III Announces He Is Still Alive, From What One Hears During Crumpets
Local Man Updates Dating Profile for Winter Weather Dates
December 13, 2025 at 11:32 PM
Local Man Updates Dating Profile for Winter Weather Dates
Christian Family Endures Backlash for Weaving Black Hawk Helicopter into Nativity Scene
December 12, 2025 at 1:15 AM
Christian Family Endures Backlash for Weaving Black Hawk Helicopter into Nativity Scene
Actual De Factual:
Actual:
General Mills is Producing 'Marty Supreme' Edition Wheaties Boxes.
*Factual:
Timothee Chalamet Thought the Shoot was for Lucky Charms.
Actual:
General Mills is Producing 'Marty Supreme' Edition Wheaties Boxes.
*Factual:
Timothee Chalamet Thought the Shoot was for Lucky Charms.
December 12, 2025 at 12:39 AM
Actual De Factual:
Actual:
General Mills is Producing 'Marty Supreme' Edition Wheaties Boxes.
*Factual:
Timothee Chalamet Thought the Shoot was for Lucky Charms.
Actual:
General Mills is Producing 'Marty Supreme' Edition Wheaties Boxes.
*Factual:
Timothee Chalamet Thought the Shoot was for Lucky Charms.
Actual de Factual: Studies Show Teens Sharing Public Steps Up to 12 hours a Day.
December 10, 2025 at 6:01 PM
Actual de Factual: Studies Show Teens Sharing Public Steps Up to 12 hours a Day.
Area Woman Sends Starbucks Gift Card to Ethiopian Farmer
December 10, 2025 at 5:56 PM
Area Woman Sends Starbucks Gift Card to Ethiopian Farmer
Australia Attempts Under 16 Ban of Social Media
"Crikey, that's a real frowny. Can I donate my old accounts to them?"
- Edie P.
"Crikey, that's a real frowny. Can I donate my old accounts to them?"
- Edie P.
December 9, 2025 at 6:52 PM
Australia Attempts Under 16 Ban of Social Media
"Crikey, that's a real frowny. Can I donate my old accounts to them?"
- Edie P.
"Crikey, that's a real frowny. Can I donate my old accounts to them?"
- Edie P.
Guillermo Del Toro Named to Direct Adaptation of Elegant, Yet Horrific Hostile Takeover of Warner Bros.
December 9, 2025 at 3:53 AM
Guillermo Del Toro Named to Direct Adaptation of Elegant, Yet Horrific Hostile Takeover of Warner Bros.
Cloud Dancer, 2025 Pantone Color of the Year, Facing Allegations for Not Being Truly Toned
December 9, 2025 at 2:19 AM
Cloud Dancer, 2025 Pantone Color of the Year, Facing Allegations for Not Being Truly Toned
The People Say: How Will YOU Spend Xmas With AI?
"I plan to let AI write all my cards, yule log, and draft my will. After that, we gonna get lit." - Nathaniel T.
"I plan to let AI write all my cards, yule log, and draft my will. After that, we gonna get lit." - Nathaniel T.
December 8, 2025 at 6:12 PM
The People Say: How Will YOU Spend Xmas With AI?
"I plan to let AI write all my cards, yule log, and draft my will. After that, we gonna get lit." - Nathaniel T.
"I plan to let AI write all my cards, yule log, and draft my will. After that, we gonna get lit." - Nathaniel T.
In Passing: God Taps Gehry To ReImagine Heaven's Gates
December 7, 2025 at 8:55 PM
In Passing: God Taps Gehry To ReImagine Heaven's Gates
Swan Insiders:
Join Us Our Chat with Real Life Jay Kelly, Accountant With No Meaningful Connection to Movies, and Cares Less Why He's Often Mistaken for Joaquin Phoenix.
Join Us Our Chat with Real Life Jay Kelly, Accountant With No Meaningful Connection to Movies, and Cares Less Why He's Often Mistaken for Joaquin Phoenix.
December 6, 2025 at 5:59 PM
Swan Insiders:
Join Us Our Chat with Real Life Jay Kelly, Accountant With No Meaningful Connection to Movies, and Cares Less Why He's Often Mistaken for Joaquin Phoenix.
Join Us Our Chat with Real Life Jay Kelly, Accountant With No Meaningful Connection to Movies, and Cares Less Why He's Often Mistaken for Joaquin Phoenix.
First Christmas Tree of 2025 Falls off Wagon
December 6, 2025 at 5:50 PM
First Christmas Tree of 2025 Falls off Wagon
Your Weekend Sherpa:
Netflix Drops 'Macron, Live!' Stand Up Comedy Special
Netflix Drops 'Macron, Live!' Stand Up Comedy Special
December 5, 2025 at 8:15 PM
Your Weekend Sherpa:
Netflix Drops 'Macron, Live!' Stand Up Comedy Special
Netflix Drops 'Macron, Live!' Stand Up Comedy Special
Sci-Fi Saga Thinly Veiled Metaphor for Disney's Intern Program
December 5, 2025 at 8:01 PM
Sci-Fi Saga Thinly Veiled Metaphor for Disney's Intern Program