Author | Lightnews

Sajdak's Sayings @sajdakssayings.bsky.social · 1m

"Steve, are you a believer or a nihilist?" (Chris)

"How could you not be a nihilist - it’s 2022. We’re doing this remotely."

-Infinite

Sajdak's Sayings @sajdakssayings.bsky.social · 20h

"He offers Gary Busey coke, and only in this fantasy world does he not accept it. ‘If my gums recede any more, I ain’t gonna have any gums left - just delicious teeth!’"

-Canvas

Gary Busey and John-Rhys Davies in Canvas

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Sajdak's Sayings @sajdakssayings.bsky.social · 1d

"We haven't talked about Arnold's stupid haircut yet. He looks like Macklemore's grandfather. No one over the age of 40 should have this haircut. He kind of looks like J. Edgar Hoover if you gave him gamma radiation."

-Sabotage

Arnold Schwarzenegger in Sabotage, with a weird high and tight haircut, and smoking a cigar

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Sajdak's Sayings @sajdakssayings.bsky.social · 1d

"You know what I never need to see? Dracula perusing the nu-metal section at a Virgin Megastore." (Andrew)

"Maybe he needed a sweet Nightmare Before Christmas poster."

-Dracula 2000

Gerard Butler as Dracula shopping in a Virgin Megastore in Dracula 2000

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Sajdak's Sayings @sajdakssayings.bsky.social · 1d

No, from the episode on Dracula 2000

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Sajdak's Sayings @sajdakssayings.bsky.social · 2d

"He also kind of looks like, if you’ve ever played it, Castlevania: Symphony of the Night - Alucard. Ten nerds just cheered in unison somewhere."

-Dracula 2000

The character Alucard from Castlevania: Symphony of the Night

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Sajdak's Sayings @sajdakssayings.bsky.social · 4d

"The only part of this story I don’t believe: there was a settlement, he got some cash, and he gave it alllll to charity."

"Yeah, the William Shatner Fund to Feed William Shatner." (Eric)

-Halloween (1978)

William Shatner Shares Initial Reaction to Capt. Kirk-Michael Myers ‘Halloween’ Mask: “Is That a Joke?”

The horror franchise's latest installment opened No. 1 at the box office over the weekend.

www.hollywoodreporter.com

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Sajdak's Sayings @sajdakssayings.bsky.social · 5d

"Vampires are the thing that everyone most wants to be: you look as human as possible, but with superpowers; you’re kind of smart; you’re bisexual, which everyone wants to be anyway…"

-Dracula 2000

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Sajdak's Sayings @sajdakssayings.bsky.social · 6d

"Can I say something a little personal about this episode? It’s my favorite Eric Szyszka joke of all-time. It’s where you peaked, and honestly, I keep waiting for you to ascend back to that level…and you never have."

-Dracula 2000

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Sajdak's Sayings @sajdakssayings.bsky.social · 6d

"You can go to the Scientology Celebrity Center in L.A. They did the e-reading thing and I touched the soup cans."

"Are you like their Dalai Lama?" (Eric)

"They ripped my shirt open and saw the birthmark of Xenu I have above my left nipple."

-The Man Who Would Be King

John Travolta using the Scientology e-meter cans

Sajdak's Sayings @sajdakssayings.bsky.social · 7d

"I love that he gets a big box of rat poison, and then he starts reading the directions! The more, the merrier, pal!"

-Man's Best Friend

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Sajdak's Sayings @sajdakssayings.bsky.social · 7d

"By the way, everyone brace for jump-scare - I have it loaded up." (Andrew)

<picture of Courtney Cox haircut>
<everyone screams>

"Is that Tales from the Crypt: Demon Night?!"

-Scream 4

Courtney Cox with some REALLY unfortunate bangs in Scream 3

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Sajdak's Sayings @sajdakssayings.bsky.social · 8d

"First of all, dogs are always having psychotic episodes - that’s what dogs are."

-Man's Best Friend

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Sajdak's Sayings @sajdakssayings.bsky.social · 8d

"If Eric was like, ‘Yo dude, come over to my house for monkey pizza,’ I’d be like, ‘Absolutely not, you fucking sick weirdo!’ But if I’m at his house for another reason, and he’s like, ‘Yo, dude, I’ve got monkey pizza, you can’t help the monkey...’"

-Man's Best Friend (Art by @sobreiro.bsky.social)

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Sajdak's Sayings @sajdakssayings.bsky.social · 9d

"It’s a nice Christmas ham, and right after my parents got divorced, so everyone’s trying. And my dad goes, ‘Hey, do you know what’s in this ham? I basted it with Pepsi!’ And the second he said, ‘Pepsi,’ I ran to the bathroom and vomited."

-Man's Best Friend

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Sajdak's Sayings @sajdakssayings.bsky.social · 12d

"Drinking Mountain Dew right before bed makes you dream in DVD menus."

-The Final Destination

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Sajdak's Sayings @sajdakssayings.bsky.social · 13d

"After Two-Face and Scrooge McDuck, no one’s allowed to have a lucky coin anymore. That’s it."

-The Final Destination

Sajdak's Sayings @sajdakssayings.bsky.social · 13d

"This movie has outright contempt for the audience. This is like asking someone to make you breakfast after an argument, and they just throw eggs at you, like, ‘Here’s your fucking breakfast!’"

-The Final Destination

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Sajdak's Sayings @sajdakssayings.bsky.social · 14d

"He also directed 2011’s Shark Night." (Andrew)

"Wait, hold on - it’s night as in ‘it’s not daytime anymore,’ or it’s knight as in ‘a shark on a horse’?"

-The Final Destination

The poster for the movie "Shark Night," with the tagline "Terror has surfaced."

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Sajdak's Sayings @sajdakssayings.bsky.social · 15d

"That’s always been my theory with haunted house horror movies - what if I get blackout drunk? Do your worst to me, ghost; I won’t remember any of it and I’m an easy target."

-Witchboard

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Sajdak's Sayings @sajdakssayings.bsky.social · 15d

"My 6th grade teacher was a crazy lady that yelled at me when I was wearing a Bart Simpson t-shirt that said ‘Cool Your Jets, Man!’ And she yelled, ‘NO, I WILL NOT COOL MY JETS…MANNNNN!’"

-Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald

A Bart Simpson t-shirt that says, "Cool your jets, man!"

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Sajdak's Sayings @sajdakssayings.bsky.social · 16d

"It turned into a kind of an ironic and fun tradition between my wife and I...please don't put me in jail."

-On watching all of the Human Centipede movies together

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Sajdak's Sayings @sajdakssayings.bsky.social · 18d

"That’s what happens when you do too much marijuana: you turn into Michael Jackson in Thriller."

-Animation Damnation: Cartoon All-Stars to the Rescue

a man in a red jacket is standing in front of zombies

ALT: a man in a red jacket is standing in front of zombies

media.tenor.com

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Sajdak's Sayings @sajdakssayings.bsky.social · 20d

"This is a perfect movie for Alzheimer’s patients because it keeps telling you what it’s doing every 9 minutes."

-Freddy vs. Jason

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Sajdak's Sayings @sajdakssayings.bsky.social · 21d

"We’re recording this in early September, and hopefully by now, I can wear a FUCKING JACKET in New York City!"

-Friday the 13th (2009)

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