Lightnews — Scholar-powered news

Edward R Morris

@saintofbouncers.bsky.social

440 followers 360 following 8.3K posts

Witch.Writer. World Fantasy Award shortlister.Pushcart/Rhysling/BSFA noms, 160+shorter works in 7 LANGUAGES.Activist.Bouncer."High Queer." Multiple Sclerosis/Ehlers-Danlos/Autism.Night King Stunt Double. Antifa Weapon X. RELATIONSHIP STATUS: SHAKESPEAREAN

Posts Media Videos Starter Packs

Edward R Morris @saintofbouncers.bsky.social · 10h

It is so nice to be able to shout such things from the rooftops, since I had that boil on my ass removed. Life is for shouting Love from the rooftops of the world. For Life. Always you <3

Edward R Morris @saintofbouncers.bsky.social · 13h

I get to cut out all of Yumyan's accidental dreadies. Like I was joking about doing. That makes me proud to EXIST. So do you, dear one. <3

1 1

Edward R Morris @saintofbouncers.bsky.social · 13h

He looks like a jowly, spluttering little Elected Official in a Tex Avery cartoon. A Mayor, say. And everything is, "NOW SEE HERE, MY GOOD MAN, THIS IS MOST IMPROPRIETOUS. Oh..my..fly has been down the whole time. Hasn't it." 🤣

Edward R Morris @saintofbouncers.bsky.social · 13h

For some reason, she runs around with the fun, really dumb, Tex Avery cartoon-like Tuxie of the bunch, whose name is Doofus. I have a pic of them chillin with two of the kittens that looks like a family portrait. Doofus is fire 🤣

Edward R Morris @saintofbouncers.bsky.social · 13h

So does Silly. It is hip displacement. As I understand it, "dysplasia" signifies the presence of cancer, which I can't diagnose. Silly's breed are susceptible to it; she is the twin of my Whitley with the bulletproof head. :( Another reason why I am so good to her. To ATONE 😭

Edward R Morris @saintofbouncers.bsky.social · 14h

HE IS OUR DEAR LEADER, AND HE LOVES YOU ALL 😍 I want to brush him, I should bring Silly's brush next time. Silly is chill about it being shared

1 1

Edward R Morris @saintofbouncers.bsky.social · 14h

*Nosebaby, if you're not into the whole brevity thing. 🤣 She is like the sad, doomed little heroine in an early Irish ghost story who somehow incarnates as a cat and desperately Has Some Stuff To Say. <3 Her eyes.

1 2

Edward R Morris @saintofbouncers.bsky.social · 14h

Blew me off my crutches. I was handing out water. WATER. Mother FUCKERS. Jim Elkins jacked off over a petri dish and the Portland Police Bureau was born. Then he reached around the back way to birth ICE

Edward R Morris @saintofbouncers.bsky.social · 15h

Guy getting thrown out for Public Intox: "YOU'RE A RAY SHISHT." Me: Looks at his pasty skin, then my pasty skin. Guy: "WELL...UH...YOU HATE GAY PEOPLE." Me (literally becomes John Waters:) "Hold up. I DATE gay people. And no gay man would ever wear those pants with those shoes. Nighty night."

Edward R Morris @saintofbouncers.bsky.social · 15h

They were a female couple,and he was calling them dykes and bitches. He was moved to another part of the venue,then removed by floor staff on that side. Both halves of the couple were two of the nicest customers I ever met there. I will defend lesbians to the death,was partially raised by one

1 1

Edward R Morris @saintofbouncers.bsky.social · 15h

"Edward is a Tall Person. We keep him in the barn, with the other giants.." 🤣

1 1

Edward R Morris @saintofbouncers.bsky.social · 15h

To be fair, I haven't worked Loss Prevention for years because I hate it, as much as I hate being a private guard. Bouncing drunks is what I do, which gets into the page-long Yelp reviews I get about Oskar Schindlering that...

1 1

Reposted by Edward R Morris

Edward R Morris @saintofbouncers.bsky.social · 16h

Everybody has a chance to be Oskar Schindler a little bit, once in a while. It's the times when we're smart enough to notice that count

1 1 2

Edward R Morris @saintofbouncers.bsky.social · 16h

Everybody has a chance to be Oskar Schindler a little bit, once in a while. It's the times when we're smart enough to notice that count

1 1 2

Edward R Morris @saintofbouncers.bsky.social · 16h

What are you talking about? I don't know anything, I'm not even supposed to be here today 🤣 What was the guy's name, Jean Valjean? Yeah, no, he's good, turn him loose 🤣

Edward R Morris @saintofbouncers.bsky.social · 16h

As a person who works private security, I gotta say... I was smoking a cigarette. I was taking a piss. The camera was down. I was on the Moon, with Steve...

1 1

Edward R Morris @saintofbouncers.bsky.social · 16h

Worth a million billion billion words. Alt text: "Edward can chill out for five minutes. Yumyan has returned from the tree." 🤣

Edward R Morris @saintofbouncers.bsky.social · 16h

I think it was collaborative, and I think I remember bellowing, "That's genius!!!" It can be a coauthored work 🤣

Edward R Morris @saintofbouncers.bsky.social · 16h

1 2

Edward R Morris @saintofbouncers.bsky.social · 17h

"Consider the strange case of Edward Morris, a frustrated writer who pitched a flashlight down a dead well, and drew water from the rock... of The Twilight Zone." </Serling, folds upper lip back down.>

1 2

Edward R Morris @saintofbouncers.bsky.social · 17h

The real tragedy of the whole series was that GZA's cousin Russell Jones was not alive to voice Dave the Bug. Dave is a lovely character and the actor is out of sight good, but... Ol Dirty Bastard in that role. This is why I also write SciFi

Edward R Morris @saintofbouncers.bsky.social · 17h

We met on here. I owe the Admins millions for this. MILLIONS

1 2

Edward R Morris @saintofbouncers.bsky.social · 17h

"A match made on MyChart." ---Sara at her usual Dorothy Parker-like peak

1 1

Edward R Morris @saintofbouncers.bsky.social · 17h

Yes I am

1 1

Edward R Morris @saintofbouncers.bsky.social · 17h

Look at the specs. No asbestos abatement. A construction project from that era would be full of asbestos