A new Koyaanisqatsi sequel by Disney, starring Nicholas Cage?? Wtf???

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Anyone who responds in agreement to any of this is possibly woke, if they respond with disagreement then they’re absolutely woke, if its a mixture of agreement and disagreement then it’s no less woke, and if it’s from a centrist position it couldn’t be more woke, unless it was from a MAGA position.

MAGA is more woke than YOLO and more woke than even NAFTA or NATO. It’s become the most woke thing out there. Not even Alexander Hamilton or Michael Bay are as woke. Not even Jay Leno. Remember when we had Johnny Carson? Remember? Yeah, that’s right… He was woke too.

Point your finger in any direction. Now. Right now. That thing is most likely woke, unless you’re Macaulay Culkin. If you’re related to John Wayne, then it’s definitely woke, but probably not if you’re related to Alec Guinness or possibly John Brown. Certainly not if you’re Michael Jordan.

Recipes are not woke. Briefcases are not woke. But nature is kind of woke. Kind of. Rainforests are much more woke than jungles, wetlands are much more woke than swamps. The ice caps have become woke while the vacuum of space is not woke anymore. Cemeteries have become woke too.

Just say no? More like just say woke. Caring is sharing? Caring is woke. There’s no I in team? There’s no I in woke either. It’s woke to say that you shouldn’t judge a book by its cover, and it’s also woke to say that clothes make the man.

If you’re anti-Apple, you’re woke, if you’re pro-Linux, you’re woke, if you’re pro-Apple, you’re woke, if you’re anti-Google, you’re woke, if you’re anti-smartphone, you’re woke, if you’re anti-PC, you’re woke, if you’re pro-smartphone, you’re woke, and if you’re anarcho-primitivist, you’re woke

If you’re only on Bluesky, you’re woke. If you’re only on X, you’re woke. If you’re both, you’re 75% woke unless you’re not on Instagram or TikTok, in which case it’s more like 99%. While fifteen out of fifty-one Americans and Brits are woke, the rest of them are not not woke, except when they are.

“Have a nice day” — woke. “Shit happens” — woke. “Just do it” — woke. “Get a life” — woke. “Life is short” — woke. “It’s your world” — woke. “Cringe,” “sus,” “rizz,” “unalive,” “slay” — woke, woke, woke, woke. “Woke”? Woke.

People who aren’t woke: Thucydides, Thrasymachus, Diogenes, Machiavelli, Hobbes, Schopenhauer, Nietzsche, and especially Baudrillard. Okay… Nietzsche was kind of woke. But compared to him, Timothy Leary, Dave Chappell, Charles Manson, and Jerry Seinfeld are extremely woke.

Nothingness isn’t woke, but the more something something is, the more woke it is. But the less something somethingness itself is, the MORE woke it is. Farms and cities and highways are woke. The ice caps have become woke while the vacuum of space has stopped being woke.

Kurt Cobain wasn’t woke, Britney Spears was woke. MTV was woke in the 90s but more so in the 00s. Barack Obama was woke, Ron Paul was woke, evangelicals are woke, hipsters were woke. MLK and Malcolm X were woke but not James Baldwin or Sly Stone, okay? God is woke, Jesus is woke, Satan is woke.

Fascism is woke, Donald Trump is woke, wokeism is woke, anti-wokeism is woke. Flags are woke, tablecloths are woke, fortune tellers are woke, social media is woke. If you’re reading this, you’re woke. If you’re not reading this, you’re woke.

There is almost certainly an AI bubble. There was a railroad bubble in the 19th century, then there was an automobile bubble, a radio bubble, an airplane bubble, a television bubble, and an Internet bubble (aka the dot com bubble). And it looks really obvious that there’s an AI bubble.