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High Church Raccoon⛪️🦝 @pilgrimaltsburg.bsky.social · 7h

Or worse yet, December 26th is a Sunday.

It's like getting a sudden bonus Holy Week (derogatory).

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High Church Raccoon⛪️🦝 @pilgrimaltsburg.bsky.social · 8h

2027: Bane! WAKE UP! MTG joined the Revolution!

a man with a mask on his face says and we give it back to you

ALT: a man with a mask on his face says and we give it back to you

media.tenor.com

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High Church Raccoon⛪️🦝 @pilgrimaltsburg.bsky.social · 8h

2024: Babe, you won't believe what MTG said this time...

2025: Bane! You won't believe what MTG said this time!

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High Church Raccoon⛪️🦝 @pilgrimaltsburg.bsky.social · 8h

MTG heel-face turn when?

Ron Filipkowski @ronfilipkowski.bsky.social · 10h

Crazy week.

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High Church Raccoon⛪️🦝 @pilgrimaltsburg.bsky.social · 10h

Unironically: which way, Western man?

Acyn @acyn.bsky.social · 12h

Doocy: Does this help get you into heaven?

Trump: I don’t think there’s anything that’s going to get me into heaven. I think I’m not heaven bound.

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High Church Raccoon⛪️🦝 @pilgrimaltsburg.bsky.social · 10h

I hope for a full list once your feeling better.

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High Church Raccoon⛪️🦝 @pilgrimaltsburg.bsky.social · 10h

Do it and report back.

a woman in a white dress is holding a futuristic device in her hands and talking to a man .

ALT: a woman in a white dress is holding a futuristic device in her hands and talking to a man .

media.tenor.com

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High Church Raccoon⛪️🦝 @pilgrimaltsburg.bsky.social · 11h

(And I don't come from a charismatic or Pentecostal background. The past decade of American politics made me think for the first time, 'Oh there are legit warring unseen powers, and demonic possession looks like utter corruption spewing forth this way.')

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High Church Raccoon⛪️🦝 @pilgrimaltsburg.bsky.social · 11h

But seriously, I legit wonder if he's being visited by spiritual forces but, like Pharaoh, hardening his heart.

I've long ago run out of ways to explain the past decade without thinking in terms of spiritual warfare.

Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com · 12h

Trump: "I don't think there's anything that's gonna get me in heaven. I think I'm not maybe heaven bound. I may be in heaven right now as we fly on Air Force One. I'm not sure I'm gonna be able to make heaven."

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High Church Raccoon⛪️🦝 @pilgrimaltsburg.bsky.social · 11h

Can we get a true prophet in there with him?

We might be able to turn this around...

I nominate @cebm.bsky.social

Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com · 12h

Trump: "I don't think there's anything that's gonna get me in heaven. I think I'm not maybe heaven bound. I may be in heaven right now as we fly on Air Force One. I'm not sure I'm gonna be able to make heaven."

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High Church Raccoon⛪️🦝 @pilgrimaltsburg.bsky.social · 16h

Ok, how did I not know Luther wrote a 1523 defense of eucharistic adoration?

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High Church Raccoon⛪️🦝 @pilgrimaltsburg.bsky.social · 16h

The European wars of religion were awful, but it is low-key funny just how often people were getting chucked out of windows in Prague. That city loves defenestrating folks.

The Defenestration of Prague lead to...
Wait, which one?
Ah. Excellent question. The *THIRD* Defenestration of Prague.

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High Church Raccoon⛪️🦝 @pilgrimaltsburg.bsky.social · 19h

I'd make a joke about the Holy Spirit calling you through the algorithm, but I'm not sure if that counts as blaspheming against the Spirit...

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High Church Raccoon⛪️🦝 @pilgrimaltsburg.bsky.social · 1d

Not the first time I've cried over a cartoon dog. Won't be the last time.

a cartoon dog is laying down on the ground

ALT: a cartoon dog is laying down on the ground

media.tenor.com

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High Church Raccoon⛪️🦝 @pilgrimaltsburg.bsky.social · 1d

Crying over cartoon dogs. How's your Saturday going?

a blue dog and an orange dog are standing next to each other and waving

ALT: a blue dog and an orange dog are standing next to each other and waving

media.tenor.com

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High Church Raccoon⛪️🦝 @pilgrimaltsburg.bsky.social · 2d

Meanwhile, the kids are exhausted from a week at daycare, and so this is very much the 5pm Friday vibe every week:

a group of people are gathered in a living room with a fire coming out of the floor

ALT: a group of people are gathered in a living room with a fire coming out of the floor

media.tenor.com

High Church Raccoon⛪️🦝 @pilgrimaltsburg.bsky.social · 2d

Seriously, this has made Thursday night through Friday my leas favorite time of the week.

Seems very wrong.

High Church Raccoon⛪️🦝 @pilgrimaltsburg.bsky.social · 3d

State of my mental health on an average Thursday night, a thread:

a close up of a cartoon chicken with big eyes looking at the camera .

ALT: a close up of a cartoon chicken with big eyes looking at the camera .

media.tenor.com

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High Church Raccoon⛪️🦝 @pilgrimaltsburg.bsky.social · 2d

Economists: For some reason, companies seem to be eating the tariffs.

Trump:

a close up of a man 's face with the words more on the bottom right

ALT: a close up of a man 's face with the words more on the bottom right

media.tenor.com

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High Church Raccoon⛪️🦝 @pilgrimaltsburg.bsky.social · 2d

It's like he's just going to keep raising tariffs until the dire inflation warnings finally come true.

Catherine Rampell @crampell.bsky.social · 2d

Trump proposing 100% tariffs on China

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High Church Raccoon⛪️🦝 @pilgrimaltsburg.bsky.social · 3d

So...what happens if we just don't reopen the government? When do we find out if these ICE goons are in it for the racism or the paycheck?

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High Church Raccoon⛪️🦝 @pilgrimaltsburg.bsky.social · 3d

"Here for a good time, not for a long time," he said while not particularly enjoying his time.

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High Church Raccoon⛪️🦝 @pilgrimaltsburg.bsky.social · 3d

Ok. So. In King of the Hill, Kahn is from Laos. He's in his 40s, roughly, in the mid-90s, meaning we can assume he left Laos in the late 70s/his mid to late 20s.

He also works for a defense contractor.

So...dude did work for the CIA during the conflict in SE Asia, right?

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High Church Raccoon⛪️🦝 @pilgrimaltsburg.bsky.social · 3d

Now does this mean we reservists need to camp all the time, or only on drill weekends?

Robert Evans (the Only Robert Evans) @iwriteok.bsky.social · 3d

a lot of people are finally waking up to the importance of the 3rd amendment. As a 3A absolutist, i think it should be illegal for soldiers to be quartered anywhere in this country. they should be camping under the open sky at all times. all military bases and barracks are unconstitutional.

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High Church Raccoon⛪️🦝 @pilgrimaltsburg.bsky.social · 3d

The Never Touch a Bunny may be the worst. Or best. It's all spring festival animals until the end, and suddenly it's an owl.

It's either an absolute failure of the theme or an absurdist troll on level of Monty Python.

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High Church Raccoon⛪️🦝 @pilgrimaltsburg.bsky.social · 3d

Never Touch a Dragon is...I hate it. So. Much.

The rhymes don't even fit with the mythology!

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