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Phil Salvador @philsalv.bsky.social · 9h

I don't know what this means but it popped in my head, please use this however you see fit

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Phil Salvador @philsalv.bsky.social · 9h

Stigmata the Hedgehog

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Phil Salvador @philsalv.bsky.social · 18h

I went in 2016 and got the "cauliflower steak," which ended up being a thick slice of uncooked cauliflower

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Phil Salvador @philsalv.bsky.social · 18h

Founding Farmers was one of the first restaurants to do the farm-to-table trend, and they sure did capitalize on it! It was always packed, to the point where business didn't decline when the quality got worse. And thus we get this 0-star review

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Phil Salvador @philsalv.bsky.social · 18h

In honor of Tom Sietsema's retirement, please revisit his legendary 0-star review of Founding Farmers

Founding Farmers review: Zero stars for the mega-popular D.C. eatery

NO STARS | The schtick is admirable; the cooking isn’t. Thank goodness for the bar.

www.washingtonpost.com

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Phil Salvador @philsalv.bsky.social · 18h

If they'd held out a little longer, they would have been able to capitalize on the stomp clap hey era of restaurants

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Phil Salvador @philsalv.bsky.social · 19h

When I went to the Myst convention in 2019 I made sure we stopped at Chili's and got the sizzlin fajitas

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Phil Salvador @philsalv.bsky.social · 1d

In that case, the Bad Gamer Movie I would recommend for you is Nintendo Quest, followed by the sequel Nintendo 64 Quest, which is 6 HOURS LONG and is probably 80% padding

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Phil Salvador @philsalv.bsky.social · 1d

I think a lot things that could've been Youtube videos turn into Tubi documentaries for the prestige of making a capital-f Film, for the same reason that things that could've been blog posts turn into books

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Phil Salvador @philsalv.bsky.social · 1d

It's too late!!!

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Phil Salvador @philsalv.bsky.social · 1d

I fully expected him to talk about this *great* little store he knows called Super Potato

Phil Salvador @philsalv.bsky.social · 1d

Would you believe that the person who said it is a white guy who moved to Japan and brags about how living in Japan means he can buy armloads of games for cheap

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Phil Salvador @philsalv.bsky.social · 1d

I just searched for "tendi" until I found a gif that matched the experience of watching this movie

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Phil Salvador @philsalv.bsky.social · 1d

A Letterboxd review said this movie was "like you've been cornered at your highschool reunion by a recently divorced dad who is very insistent on telling you about his new hobby," which is pretty accurate

Anyway, don't watch Rarity: Retro Video Game Collecting in the Modern Era!

Rarity: Retro Video Game Collecting in the Modern Era (2021)

As retro-game collecting becomes more and more popular, these interviews explore its evolution, game oddities, rarities, and various collections.

tubitv.com

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Phil Salvador @philsalv.bsky.social · 1d

And the movie just... stops. There is no ending. In the middle of an interview with a collector about how much their collection is worth, SMASH CUT to the credits. It's like they ran out of footage

Krusty the Clown, looking surprised with a cigarette hanging out of his mouth.

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Phil Salvador @philsalv.bsky.social · 1d

Ooooo good call. My previous winner was The Die is Cast into Explorers

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Phil Salvador @philsalv.bsky.social · 1d

Everyone knows you married me for my CIB copy of Rat Attack. This marriage is a sham!!!!

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Phil Salvador @philsalv.bsky.social · 1d

I am fascinated by an interview with this woman who collects N64 games and married an N64 collector and had an N64-themed wedding. She says that if he stopped collecting N64 games, it would put a strain on their marriage

Even the worst of these documentaries are anthropologically fascinating

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Phil Salvador @philsalv.bsky.social · 1d

We're near the end, and we've reached the "close to having an epiphany" segment that always shows up in these documentaries. Collectors talking about how game collecting has ruined their relationships with their family and forcefully declaring that they are NOT hoarders

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Phil Salvador @philsalv.bsky.social · 1d

Molly did you see that fucking pizza

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Phil Salvador @philsalv.bsky.social · 1d

three cartoon characters are standing next to each other and one of them has a green haircut

ALT: three cartoon characters are standing next to each other and one of them has a green haircut

media.tenor.com

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Phil Salvador @philsalv.bsky.social · 1d

Royalty-free cover of Leonard Cohen's Hallelujah playing over screenshots of eBay listings. I don't know who this is for

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Phil Salvador @philsalv.bsky.social · 1d

Now there's a game collector telling a story about tracking down the child of a dead local video store owner to see if he has any games he wants to sell

I have completely checked out. Another half hour and I'm free

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Phil Salvador @philsalv.bsky.social · 1d

It seems like they ran out of ideas after the first hour, because the rest of the documentary is random game collector YouTubers remembering things, interspersed with stock footage

This collector is telling a story about a time he got pizza, so they put in stock footage of a pizza

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Phil Salvador @philsalv.bsky.social · 1d

I THINK they're trying to make a documentary about how game collecting has evolved over the years, but the filmmaking is so inept that they're just hitting Record while somebody talks for 10 minutes and then putting that directly on their Premiere timeline

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