Naomi Maria May
@nmplatinum.bsky.social
🏳️🌈 She/They, Former model, ~* soon to be famous™ *~, all around nice gal. Probably better than you
💚🤍🖤
🌐 Somewhere outside of a closet, Germany
💚🤍🖤
🌐 Somewhere outside of a closet, Germany
It's crazy how far vegan food options have come over the last decade. When my sister became a vegan around 10 years ago my mom had to drive to another city so we could find a shop that sold tofu and right now I'm eating pasta with vegan pesto I bought at the regular grocery store around the corner
December 19, 2025 at 4:50 PM
It's crazy how far vegan food options have come over the last decade. When my sister became a vegan around 10 years ago my mom had to drive to another city so we could find a shop that sold tofu and right now I'm eating pasta with vegan pesto I bought at the regular grocery store around the corner
Since I want everyone, regardless of gender identity, to be able to experience the "joy" of being hit on in sleazy way, here's a thread of bad pickup lines I came up with for trans, nonbinary and otherwise non-cis people:
(DISCLAIMER: Do not use these irl unless you want to embarass yourself)
(DISCLAIMER: Do not use these irl unless you want to embarass yourself)
December 18, 2025 at 4:10 PM
Since I want everyone, regardless of gender identity, to be able to experience the "joy" of being hit on in sleazy way, here's a thread of bad pickup lines I came up with for trans, nonbinary and otherwise non-cis people:
(DISCLAIMER: Do not use these irl unless you want to embarass yourself)
(DISCLAIMER: Do not use these irl unless you want to embarass yourself)
I've been reading a lot of Manhwas lately and it's strange how all these Korean authors keep on writing stories where 95% of the problems are caused by strict emotionally unavailable uncommunicative parents with too high expectations and a bias towards one of their children. Weird huh :)
December 17, 2025 at 8:03 PM
I've been reading a lot of Manhwas lately and it's strange how all these Korean authors keep on writing stories where 95% of the problems are caused by strict emotionally unavailable uncommunicative parents with too high expectations and a bias towards one of their children. Weird huh :)
I was today years old when I learned that the English abreviation I.O.U. literally stands for "I Owe You". Only ever seen it writing and never said it out loud so I just thought it refered to some actual specific document or legal term and never put two and two together
December 17, 2025 at 3:14 PM
I was today years old when I learned that the English abreviation I.O.U. literally stands for "I Owe You". Only ever seen it writing and never said it out loud so I just thought it refered to some actual specific document or legal term and never put two and two together
Whenever I see a clip of Bryan Alvarez talking about NXT or Ava nowadays I get reminded of the quote from BobbyBroccoli's SSC video where Admiral James D. Watkins, after having been informed of the need for a budget increase, reportedly "went non-linear and had to be scraped of the ceiling"
December 16, 2025 at 9:43 PM
Whenever I see a clip of Bryan Alvarez talking about NXT or Ava nowadays I get reminded of the quote from BobbyBroccoli's SSC video where Admiral James D. Watkins, after having been informed of the need for a budget increase, reportedly "went non-linear and had to be scraped of the ceiling"
Oh the cruel urge to learn Japanese just so I can watch anime without having to pay attention to them
December 15, 2025 at 6:59 PM
Oh the cruel urge to learn Japanese just so I can watch anime without having to pay attention to them
Personality update installed. From this point forward I'm going to be super interested in bats because I want to have a cool animal obsession like other people and I actually don't need a better reason to justify reading bat related wikipedia articles :)
December 14, 2025 at 7:42 PM
Personality update installed. From this point forward I'm going to be super interested in bats because I want to have a cool animal obsession like other people and I actually don't need a better reason to justify reading bat related wikipedia articles :)
Jesus Christ I just tried running without a bra for the first time in a while and my breasts felt like they would tear themself off. Bounciness is great and all but I think I'm now confined to walking speed unless I put them in boobie jail :(
December 7, 2025 at 8:51 PM
Jesus Christ I just tried running without a bra for the first time in a while and my breasts felt like they would tear themself off. Bounciness is great and all but I think I'm now confined to walking speed unless I put them in boobie jail :(
I think AEW is kinda like a cat. They are usually somewhat intelligent but also sometimes do stupid things just because they're bored or overly excited yet at other times they do stuff for reasons mere mortals seemingly can't comprehend but they also usually land back on their feet most of the time
December 7, 2025 at 11:42 AM
I think AEW is kinda like a cat. They are usually somewhat intelligent but also sometimes do stupid things just because they're bored or overly excited yet at other times they do stuff for reasons mere mortals seemingly can't comprehend but they also usually land back on their feet most of the time
I think not knowing what the word kafkaesque means is the most kafkaesque thing you can do
December 5, 2025 at 7:02 PM
I think not knowing what the word kafkaesque means is the most kafkaesque thing you can do
Next year US works published in 1930 will become public domain. The fact that every year from now on Disney will lose the rights to more and more of their classic characters with us slowly but surely getting closer to their modern design fills me with an amount of glee I can hardly describe
December 3, 2025 at 12:00 PM
Next year US works published in 1930 will become public domain. The fact that every year from now on Disney will lose the rights to more and more of their classic characters with us slowly but surely getting closer to their modern design fills me with an amount of glee I can hardly describe
All the various different circumstances that had to come together to make the fact that Bangkok is the capital of Thailand so uniquely funny kinda makes you ponder the existence of a higher power with a really strange sense of humour
December 3, 2025 at 8:15 AM
All the various different circumstances that had to come together to make the fact that Bangkok is the capital of Thailand so uniquely funny kinda makes you ponder the existence of a higher power with a really strange sense of humour
I'm not saying that we should stop naming anything vaguely science-related in Greek or Latin but what I am saying is that whoever came up with the name "pedometer" should have maybe thought twice about that
November 30, 2025 at 4:04 PM
I'm not saying that we should stop naming anything vaguely science-related in Greek or Latin but what I am saying is that whoever came up with the name "pedometer" should have maybe thought twice about that
Oh no I'm again feeling the urge to hug every animal I see but I'm burdened by the knowledge that most animals don't want to be hugged. Send help :(
November 26, 2025 at 7:59 AM
Oh no I'm again feeling the urge to hug every animal I see but I'm burdened by the knowledge that most animals don't want to be hugged. Send help :(
Due to the cloudflare outage going on I'm currently collecting sticks to sharpen into spears. If the internet goes down I want to be ready to go full cavewoman mode
November 18, 2025 at 2:02 PM
Due to the cloudflare outage going on I'm currently collecting sticks to sharpen into spears. If the internet goes down I want to be ready to go full cavewoman mode
It's scary how often I forget that trans people exist. That would probably be a very bad thing on its own but it's actually even worse because I'm trans myself :)
November 13, 2025 at 8:30 PM
It's scary how often I forget that trans people exist. That would probably be a very bad thing on its own but it's actually even worse because I'm trans myself :)
I think the first time I fully was like "Yeah, I guess I really am aromantic" was when I heard some guy complain about getting friendzoned by a girl and I genuienly couldn't understand how that was supposed to be a bad thing
November 12, 2025 at 7:41 PM
I think the first time I fully was like "Yeah, I guess I really am aromantic" was when I heard some guy complain about getting friendzoned by a girl and I genuienly couldn't understand how that was supposed to be a bad thing
It would be really funny if in regard to the existence of alien life we as humans are just all suffering from massive imposter syndrome insofar as that we look upon the world we created and altered to pur needs and just assume that other beings must have already done the same things to their worlds
November 10, 2025 at 10:16 AM
It would be really funny if in regard to the existence of alien life we as humans are just all suffering from massive imposter syndrome insofar as that we look upon the world we created and altered to pur needs and just assume that other beings must have already done the same things to their worlds
Doing art is annoying because even though I can't achieve it for now I always strive for perfection yet the world I'm trying to depict is inherently imperfect so it really is a fool's errand
November 8, 2025 at 8:36 AM
Doing art is annoying because even though I can't achieve it for now I always strive for perfection yet the world I'm trying to depict is inherently imperfect so it really is a fool's errand
Batman is probably pretty insufferable as a guest at a diner because he seems like the kind of guy to ask "Got ham?" every time he orders a sandwich
October 23, 2025 at 6:12 PM
Batman is probably pretty insufferable as a guest at a diner because he seems like the kind of guy to ask "Got ham?" every time he orders a sandwich
I think my prefered way to get people to open up their hearts to me is with a scalpell
October 20, 2025 at 4:37 PM
I think my prefered way to get people to open up their hearts to me is with a scalpell
Saw some tits from my window just now. Really awesome little things but they were gone so fast that I couldn't even take a photo :(
Think it was blue tits but I'm not good with birds. Hope they come back and bring their friends next time :)
Think it was blue tits but I'm not good with birds. Hope they come back and bring their friends next time :)
October 19, 2025 at 3:20 PM
Saw some tits from my window just now. Really awesome little things but they were gone so fast that I couldn't even take a photo :(
Think it was blue tits but I'm not good with birds. Hope they come back and bring their friends next time :)
Think it was blue tits but I'm not good with birds. Hope they come back and bring their friends next time :)
A good example why the whole thing about AI being put into everything is a stupid idea is that every time I unsucessfuly try to find a way how I can turn those features off I ask the AI itself how to disable it only for it to give me a wrong answer that is just completely made up
October 18, 2025 at 10:00 AM
A good example why the whole thing about AI being put into everything is a stupid idea is that every time I unsucessfuly try to find a way how I can turn those features off I ask the AI itself how to disable it only for it to give me a wrong answer that is just completely made up
Climate change deniers are no fun. If they at least had a good reason for it like "Let's get revenge on the icebergs for what they did to the Titanic" or smth I could understand it but no they're not even the entertaining kind of stupid
October 18, 2025 at 8:41 AM
Climate change deniers are no fun. If they at least had a good reason for it like "Let's get revenge on the icebergs for what they did to the Titanic" or smth I could understand it but no they're not even the entertaining kind of stupid
If you sell carpets at your shop and your name begins with D you are legally obligated to call it the D. Rug Store
October 17, 2025 at 7:56 PM
If you sell carpets at your shop and your name begins with D you are legally obligated to call it the D. Rug Store