miss jordan
@missjordan.bsky.social
I was .2 seconds late to a student loan payment, so naturally I woke up to d*ath threats, drones circling my apartment and a warrant out for my arrest
July 29, 2025 at 4:25 PM
I was .2 seconds late to a student loan payment, so naturally I woke up to d*ath threats, drones circling my apartment and a warrant out for my arrest
can we skip july and get to MY month… i’m impatient
June 24, 2025 at 1:59 AM
can we skip july and get to MY month… i’m impatient
PSA: WE ARE NOT DOING ALUMINUM FREE DEODORANT THIS YEAR. ABSOLUTELY NOT. THAT SHIT RUINED MY WHOLE DAY AND YOU KNOW YOU STINK
June 11, 2025 at 11:23 PM
PSA: WE ARE NOT DOING ALUMINUM FREE DEODORANT THIS YEAR. ABSOLUTELY NOT. THAT SHIT RUINED MY WHOLE DAY AND YOU KNOW YOU STINK
terrified is an understatement
April 7, 2025 at 4:00 AM
terrified is an understatement
can collages come back in 2025
February 22, 2025 at 6:06 AM
can collages come back in 2025
“girlhood and healing” and it’s me painting my toenails after folding towels then making a killer pasta dish
February 20, 2025 at 3:56 AM
“girlhood and healing” and it’s me painting my toenails after folding towels then making a killer pasta dish
are cute fit pics acceptable here i am still learning
January 24, 2025 at 5:22 AM
are cute fit pics acceptable here i am still learning
relentless messages of men talking to themselves in your dms feels like being hunted for sport
January 11, 2025 at 5:32 PM
relentless messages of men talking to themselves in your dms feels like being hunted for sport
Reposted by miss jordan
life if snapchat didn’t exist
January 21, 2024 at 2:13 PM
life if snapchat didn’t exist
did everyone go through a blue room phase please say yes
November 8, 2023 at 6:48 AM
did everyone go through a blue room phase please say yes
“men don’t find it attractive when-“ i promise you from the bottom of my heart i do not give a plummeting fuck
November 7, 2023 at 3:30 PM
“men don’t find it attractive when-“ i promise you from the bottom of my heart i do not give a plummeting fuck
flushed the toilet in the longhorn bathroom and siri said she didn’t understand the question
October 21, 2023 at 6:51 PM
flushed the toilet in the longhorn bathroom and siri said she didn’t understand the question
Reposted by miss jordan
WHY ARE FLYING BUGS SO LOUD. AYO SHUT UP
October 18, 2023 at 10:41 PM
WHY ARE FLYING BUGS SO LOUD. AYO SHUT UP
went to home depot now i got a ballsack and can walk my dogs alone at night
October 20, 2023 at 1:26 AM
went to home depot now i got a ballsack and can walk my dogs alone at night
asking me if i want a protein bar is like asking me if i wanna eat your hamster’s bedding
October 19, 2023 at 2:24 AM
asking me if i want a protein bar is like asking me if i wanna eat your hamster’s bedding
do you ever think about what’ll happen to your game characters if you just die like i know my animal crossing villagers would be so confused
July 23, 2023 at 11:29 PM
do you ever think about what’ll happen to your game characters if you just die like i know my animal crossing villagers would be so confused
what’s a song that makes you throw your ass in a circle no matter what? (one of) mine is boogie by brockhampton💀✋
July 9, 2023 at 2:21 AM
what’s a song that makes you throw your ass in a circle no matter what? (one of) mine is boogie by brockhampton💀✋
me: my head kinda hurts a little i wonder if-
google: you better preorder your casket boo boo bear😋😍🥰😘
google: you better preorder your casket boo boo bear😋😍🥰😘
July 4, 2023 at 12:41 AM
me: my head kinda hurts a little i wonder if-
google: you better preorder your casket boo boo bear😋😍🥰😘
google: you better preorder your casket boo boo bear😋😍🥰😘
the vacuum from teletubbies seriously has no reason being that fucking scary
July 3, 2023 at 2:39 AM
the vacuum from teletubbies seriously has no reason being that fucking scary
Reposted by miss jordan
bluesky not having a media tab on profiles is the horny guys personal 9/11
July 3, 2023 at 1:43 AM
bluesky not having a media tab on profiles is the horny guys personal 9/11
fuck team edward or team jacob were you team tom or team jerry
July 2, 2023 at 12:36 AM
fuck team edward or team jacob were you team tom or team jerry