Michael
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minealone6.bsky.social
Michael
@minealone6.bsky.social
120 followers 700 following 200 posts
I dabble in the comedies. Amateurishly funny. Second-rate comedian. Fair to middling joke writer. Likes - pizza, chili, pumping Iron, a good cigar, a bad cigar, traveling, cats, candy (specially Snickers), old Popeye cartoons, cookies and milk, hotdogs.
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minealone6.bsky.social
Michael @minealone6.bsky.social Β· 13h
πŸ‚ You know you're in a somewhat classy, yet bad part of town, when you pull up to a stop light, and a guy tries to sell you pumpkin spiced heroin. πŸ‚
minealone6.bsky.social
Michael @minealone6.bsky.social Β· 3d
They said no texting while driving but they never said anything about carving your jack-o'-lantern! πŸŽƒ

....so anyway, does anyone know any good accident attorneys?
minealone6.bsky.social
Michael @minealone6.bsky.social Β· 3d
It's a scientific fact that anytime more than three women in costume get together, excessive alcohol consumption ensues....
πŸŽƒ #Halloween🍷#HoldHerHairBack 🍸
minealone6.bsky.social
Michael @minealone6.bsky.social Β· 3d
Me: You're like wild kisses, a scent of heaven, looks the sunrise would envy, you ignite my wanton desires, a love that’s soul deep, you are my world...

Dollar General clerk: um, Sir? Can you stop hugging the Halloween candy and hand them to me so I can scan them?
πŸ¦‡ 🍭 πŸŽƒ
minealone6.bsky.social
Michael @minealone6.bsky.social Β· 3d
πŸŽƒπŸ‘Ή If you really want to freak out your pizza place, tell'em to cut your pie into the shape of a pentagram. πŸ‘ΉπŸŽƒ
#Halloween
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minealone6.bsky.social
Michael @minealone6.bsky.social Β· 7d
πŸ§›πŸ¦‡ Had a big helping of garlic bread last night, so I'm happy to announce, still not a vampire! πŸ¦‡πŸ§›
1 1
minealone6.bsky.social
Michael @minealone6.bsky.social Β· 10d
πŸ‘ΉJust saw an advertisement for a "sexy Chewbacca" costume. There's a lot of qualities I find attractive in a woman, but hairy and growling aren't on the list.

Although... πŸ€”
minealone6.bsky.social
Michael @minealone6.bsky.social Β· 10d
You ever been so sad, that wondering around and people watching at a backwoods Walmart after midnight, doesn't even cheer you up?
minealone6.bsky.social
Michael @minealone6.bsky.social Β· 10d
Ok, I was thinking about what I should dress up as for Halloween, and I've got an idea, but wanted to ask everybody first and see what's y'alls thoughts were.

πŸŽƒ So, yea or nay on sexy pumpkin? Good idea or am I just out of my gourd? Should I do it, or squash the idea? πŸŽƒ

Sexy Burger King then?
minealone6.bsky.social
Michael @minealone6.bsky.social Β· 10d
I wash my dishes with all natural cleaners!

....I throw them outside and let the possums and raccoons lick them clean.
🦝
minealone6.bsky.social
Michael @minealone6.bsky.social Β· 14d
Well it's almost that time of year!
.
.
.
.
....where I constantly complain about the cold weather....
πŸ₯Ά
minealone6.bsky.social
Michael @minealone6.bsky.social Β· 17d
🦜She's covered in bird droppings!

🐦

πŸ¦β€β¬› I wonder what my car did to scare the crap out of all those birds perched above it? πŸ•ŠοΈ
minealone6.bsky.social
Michael @minealone6.bsky.social Β· 17d
You know you've had too much caffeine when you yell "MINE!" before the ball is even served!
β˜• #Volleyball 🏐
minealone6.bsky.social
Michael @minealone6.bsky.social Β· 17d
If you want people to leave you alone, just wear a shirt that says "Property of County Psychiatric Ward".

Works for me.
minealone6.bsky.social
Michael @minealone6.bsky.social Β· 17d
I've been on Facebook for 14 years, and all I have to show for it is the shame....
minealone6.bsky.social
Michael @minealone6.bsky.social Β· 17d
When I get around my dad, my smartassness tends to flare up really bad.... πŸ˜„
minealone6.bsky.social
Michael @minealone6.bsky.social Β· 17d
Hot Gal: Hey, can you do me a favor? Can you help me move some furniture this weekend?
Me: *sly smile & raises eyebrows* Oh I'll help you move some furniture....you mean, like your bed and mattress!
Hot Gal: What? Ew! No! Gross! You know what? Never mind, I'll ask somebody else!
minealone6.bsky.social
Michael @minealone6.bsky.social Β· 17d
🌿🌱🌾 I can't see how tall the grass is in my neighbor's yard, because the grass in my yard is blocking my view. 🌾🌱🌿
minealone6.bsky.social
Michael @minealone6.bsky.social Β· 17d
Got home, put my key in the door, walked inside, set my bag on the floor, took a deep breath and said.....

"It smells like BROKE in here!"

#Inflation #PoorBoy πŸ’Έ
minealone6.bsky.social
Michael @minealone6.bsky.social Β· 26d
Jeez! Since it's getting cooler, I guess they're trying to get inside. Around my place the stink bugs are everywhe...

*sniffs *

...oh, dude, really?
minealone6.bsky.social
Michael @minealone6.bsky.social Β· 26d
Got home, put my key in the door, walked inside, set my bag on the floor, took a deep breath and said.....

"It smells like BROKE in here!"

#Inflation #PoorBoy πŸ’Έ
minealone6.bsky.social
Michael @minealone6.bsky.social Β· 28d
*After stopping by to pick up desert for everybody*

Me: I couldn't find any "almond bark and pumpkin spice cheesecake" donuts. I guess a bunch of White girls got there before I did.
🍩
minealone6.bsky.social
Michael @minealone6.bsky.social Β· 28d
"Haha, I'm still young" I say as I email the tournament director, asking if they would consider having a dinosaur division....
πŸ¦•
minealone6.bsky.social
Michael @minealone6.bsky.social Β· Oct 2
I hate to admit it, but the way things have been going, I thought the government *already* was shut down!
πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡² #PoliticalPost πŸ¦… #Republican πŸ—³οΈ #Democrat
minealone6.bsky.social
Michael @minealone6.bsky.social Β· Oct 2
πŸͺ² "HOLY CRAP! Ain't no way I'm going in there! Even I have standards, yo!"
~ What stinkbugs say when they see my place πŸͺ²