Linux Fortunes
@linuxfortunes.bsky.social
Random fortune cookies provided by Linux's very own fortune-mod
<knghtbrd> it's too bad most ancient unices are y2k compliant
<|Rain|> too bad?
<|Rain|> why, because people won't upgrade until 2038?
[knghtbrd/307]
November 15, 2025 at 10:00 AM
<knghtbrd> it's too bad most ancient unices are y2k compliant
<|Rain|> too bad?
<|Rain|> why, because people won't upgrade until 2038?
[knghtbrd/307]
Q: What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish wake?
A: One less drunk.
[riddles/98]
November 15, 2025 at 9:00 AM
Q: What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish wake?
A: One less drunk.
[riddles/98]
Eternal nothingness is fine if you happen to be dressed for it.
-- Woody Allen
[humorists/30]
November 15, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Eternal nothingness is fine if you happen to be dressed for it.
-- Woody Allen
[humorists/30]
This universe shipped by weight, not by volume. Some expansion of the
contents may have occurred during shipment.
[science/538]
November 15, 2025 at 7:00 AM
This universe shipped by weight, not by volume. Some expansion of the
contents may have occurred during shipment.
[science/538]
Other women cloy
The appetites they feed, but she makes hungry
Where most she satisfies.
-- Antony and Cleopatra
[songs-poems/426]
November 15, 2025 at 6:00 AM
Other women cloy
The appetites they feed, but she makes hungry
Where most she satisfies.
-- Antony and Cleopatra
[songs-poems/426]
The Assassin moved quietly from roof to roof until he was well away from
the excitement around the Watch House. His movements could be called
cat-like, except that he did not stop to spray urine up against things.
-- Terry Pratchett, "Night Watch"
[pratchett/1]
November 15, 2025 at 5:00 AM
The Assassin moved quietly from roof to roof until he was well away from
the excitement around the Watch House. His movements could be called
cat-like, except that he did not stop to spray urine up against things.
-- Terry Pratchett, "Night Watch"
[pratchett/1]
To lead people, you must follow behind.
-- Lao Tsu
[wisdom/342]
November 15, 2025 at 4:00 AM
To lead people, you must follow behind.
-- Lao Tsu
[wisdom/342]
The only justification for our concepts and systems of concepts is that they
serve to represent the complex of our experiences; beyond this they have
no legitimacy.
-- Albert Einstein
[science/472]
November 15, 2025 at 3:00 AM
The only justification for our concepts and systems of concepts is that they
serve to represent the complex of our experiences; beyond this they have
no legitimacy.
-- Albert Einstein
[science/472]
Go ahead, vote! Have faith in your delegates, believe in those you have voted for. But if you voted, don't complain.
-- Albert Libertad
[anarchism/16]
November 15, 2025 at 2:00 AM
Go ahead, vote! Have faith in your delegates, believe in those you have voted for. But if you voted, don't complain.
-- Albert Libertad
[anarchism/16]
Debian Hint #42: You can use 'apt-file list <package_name>' to obtain a listing
of the contents of debian package. This action is similar to
'dpkg -L <package_name>' except the package does not need to be installed or
fetched using apt and analyzed with 'dpkg-deb -c <deb_name>'.
[debian-hints/41]
November 15, 2025 at 1:00 AM
Debian Hint #42: You can use 'apt-file list <package_name>' to obtain a listing
of the contents of debian package. This action is similar to
'dpkg -L <package_name>' except the package does not need to be installed or
fetched using apt and analyzed with 'dpkg-deb -c <deb_name>'.
[debian-hints/41]
Never call a man a fool. Borrow from him.
[work/287]
November 15, 2025 at 12:00 AM
Never call a man a fool. Borrow from him.
[work/287]
I got the bill for my surgery. Now I know what those doctors were
wearing masks for.
-- James Boren
[medicine/32]
November 14, 2025 at 11:00 PM
I got the bill for my surgery. Now I know what those doctors were
wearing masks for.
-- James Boren
[medicine/32]
It is by the fortune of God that, in this country, we have three benefits:
freedom of speech, freedom of thought, and the wisdom never to use either.
-- Mark Twain
[literature/106]
November 14, 2025 at 10:00 PM
It is by the fortune of God that, in this country, we have three benefits:
freedom of speech, freedom of thought, and the wisdom never to use either.
-- Mark Twain
[literature/106]
We question most of the mantras around here periodically, in case
you hadn't noticed. :-)
-- Larry Wall in <[email protected]>
[perl/131]
November 14, 2025 at 9:00 PM
We question most of the mantras around here periodically, in case
you hadn't noticed. :-)
-- Larry Wall in <[email protected]>
[perl/131]
<lilo> I've always wanted to have a web site with a big picture of a carrot on it
[debian/31]
November 14, 2025 at 8:00 PM
<lilo> I've always wanted to have a web site with a big picture of a carrot on it
[debian/31]
I've got a bad feeling about this.
[cookie/146]
November 14, 2025 at 7:00 PM
I've got a bad feeling about this.
[cookie/146]
Billy: Mom, you know that vase you said was handed down from
generation to generation?
Mom: Yes?
Billy: Well, this generation dropped it.
[kids/22]
November 14, 2025 at 6:00 PM
Billy: Mom, you know that vase you said was handed down from
generation to generation?
Mom: Yes?
Billy: Well, this generation dropped it.
[kids/22]
Practice is the best of all instructors.
-- Publilius
[education/133]
November 14, 2025 at 5:00 PM
Practice is the best of all instructors.
-- Publilius
[education/133]
I'd like to meet the guy who invented beer and see what he's working on now.
[drugs/73]
November 14, 2025 at 3:00 PM
I'd like to meet the guy who invented beer and see what he's working on now.
[drugs/73]
This life is a test. It is only a test. Had this been an actual life, you
would have received further instructions as to what to do and where to go.
[news/54]
November 14, 2025 at 2:00 PM
This life is a test. It is only a test. Had this been an actual life, you
would have received further instructions as to what to do and where to go.
[news/54]
Know what I hate most? Rhetorical questions.
-- Henry N. Camp
[miscellaneous/326]
November 14, 2025 at 1:00 PM
Know what I hate most? Rhetorical questions.
-- Henry N. Camp
[miscellaneous/326]
If God had wanted us to be concerned for the plight of the toads, he would
have made them cute and furry.
-- Dave Barry
[humorists/115]
November 14, 2025 at 12:00 PM
If God had wanted us to be concerned for the plight of the toads, he would
have made them cute and furry.
-- Dave Barry
[humorists/115]
Such a foolish notion, that war is called devotion, when the greatest
warriors are the ones who stand for peace.
[politics/455]
November 14, 2025 at 11:00 AM
Such a foolish notion, that war is called devotion, when the greatest
warriors are the ones who stand for peace.
[politics/455]
If you can't read this, blame a teacher.
[education/93]
November 14, 2025 at 10:00 AM
If you can't read this, blame a teacher.
[education/93]
knowledge, n.:
Things you believe.
[definitions/522]
November 14, 2025 at 9:00 AM
knowledge, n.:
Things you believe.
[definitions/522]