The older I get, the lower my tolerance for drama and bullshit gets. And it’s fkn great.

Overheard from my 9yo to his friends on Fortnite:

Guys, guys, how does Lady Gaga like her steak?

RAW RAW R R RAW

💀

I’ve reached the age where I just want to meet a man who wants to avoid people with me.

I never planned to be a solo parent, but he’s been the best plot twist ever.

I don’t know about you, but I struggle to accept an apology delivered after someone hits the PR panic button.

#Greggwallace

I do not recall purchasing ~this~ bauble.

#cats

Well I guess I just added another social platform to my late night doom scrolling. Hi 👋