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Antifa Co., Inc.

@karpovsmachine.bsky.social

140 followers 44 following 6.6K posts

I am the domestic terror organization that burned the entire city of Seattle to the ground. And I'll do it again. You found me, but you can't stop me. Ask me why ACAB. Go ahead and ask. I can prove it.

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Antifa Co., Inc. @karpovsmachine.bsky.social · 8h

It's really weird to say, "The author just makes the characters do whatever he personally wants them to do!" and mean that as a criticism. Like, are you new to the concept of fiction, my dude?

Antifa Co., Inc. @karpovsmachine.bsky.social · 16h

Fun fact:

Reputable body artists don't do "lost a bet" tattoos/brandings/scarification because enthusiastic consent is absolutely crucial when altering a person's body in any way.

Antifa Co., Inc. @karpovsmachine.bsky.social · 1d

That's not say there are not potentially positive uses for it. The key word there is "potentially." At present, just about every single one of those positive uses is a hypothetical. The actual, present uses are all detrimental to humanity.

Antifa Co., Inc. @karpovsmachine.bsky.social · 1d

I've learned how to use it effectively. It's transformational in ways that are almost entirely negative. In kind of the same way environmental mutagens are transformational.

Antifa Co., Inc. @karpovsmachine.bsky.social · 1d

Man, hibernation is what's up. Why can't I just get really fat and then lose consciousness through all the shit months? That sounds sweet.

Antifa Co., Inc. @karpovsmachine.bsky.social · 1d

Pour vous

youtu.be

Antifa Co., Inc. @karpovsmachine.bsky.social · 1d

Karpov's Machine? But he died thirty years ago . . . in this very room.

Some say that on the coldest nights, you can still hear his Sony bookshelf stereo, endlessly changing discs, but never playing a track . . .

Antifa Co., Inc. @karpovsmachine.bsky.social · 2d

To the melody of "Boot Scootin' Boogie":

🎵Skeet tweetin' tooties!🎶

Antifa Co., Inc. @karpovsmachine.bsky.social · 2d

He's a really good drummer.

Antifa Co., Inc. @karpovsmachine.bsky.social · 2d

It's actually to protect the rest of the band from the drummer. This was the best possible solution for all involved.

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Antifa Co., Inc. @karpovsmachine.bsky.social · 2d

Happy Harper's Ferry Day to all who celebrate!

Be the John Brown you want to see in the world.

Harpers Ferry Raid (Encyclopaedia Britannica illustration)
John Brown and others inside the engine house of the Harpers Ferry armory just before the U.S. Marines stormed the building, 1859.

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Antifa Co., Inc. @karpovsmachine.bsky.social · 3d

Not much, brah, what's up with you?

Also, it's an autoimmune disorder. Because what isn't?

Antifa Co., Inc. @karpovsmachine.bsky.social · 3d

Says here you have uppdogg.

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Antifa Co., Inc. @karpovsmachine.bsky.social · 3d

NB: I'm aware that atheism is not a religion, but the self-aggrandizing human garbage pastor called it out as one.

Antifa Co., Inc. @karpovsmachine.bsky.social · 3d

It actually went over surprisingly well, in that a bunch of people quietly nodded while I spoke, the pastor in question walked out, and not one soul has brought it up since.

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Antifa Co., Inc. @karpovsmachine.bsky.social · 3d

I don't interact much with my extended family and live literally 3,000 miles away, so I decided to take some time to address those assembled about how much that was complete bullshit and my grandmother's funeral was not the place to be trying to tell her mourning family that they're going to hell.

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Antifa Co., Inc. @karpovsmachine.bsky.social · 3d

One of the pastors at my grandmother's church decided during her funeral to go on and on about how Jesus is the only possible way to heaven, knowing full well that some of her family were Muslim, Buddhist, or Atheist, and even called out those religions specifically. I wasn't having that shit.

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Antifa Co., Inc. @karpovsmachine.bsky.social · 4d

Y'know what never gets old? Jokes about Charlie Kirk's death.

Also . . . Charlie Kirk.

Antifa Co., Inc. @karpovsmachine.bsky.social · 4d

I am the Alpha and the Omega, the First and the Last, the Genitalia and the Terminalia.

Antifa Co., Inc. @karpovsmachine.bsky.social · 4d

Fun fact:

The opposite of "terminal" is "genital."

No, really. Look it up.

Antifa Co., Inc. @karpovsmachine.bsky.social · 4d

GS-4 level jobs include things like clerk-typist, financial clerk, data entry, sales clerk, supply clerk, dispatcher, claims assistant, medical records tech, and enlisted military. Basically, anything that's not a strictly entry-level/minimum-wage job and requires some degree of literacy/numeracy.

Antifa Co., Inc. @karpovsmachine.bsky.social · 4d

6/6. Possess either a bachelor's degree (in ANYTHING) or 3 years of experience in any kind of GS-4 level job.

Antifa Co., Inc. @karpovsmachine.bsky.social · 4d

4/6. Eligible for lowest level security clearance (generally just means passing a criminal background check - not being convicted of or under investigation for any felonies)

5/6. Capable of safely operating and lawfully possessing a firearm

Antifa Co., Inc. @karpovsmachine.bsky.social · 4d

Fun fact:
The only requirements to be a deportation officer with ICE are:

1/6. U.S. citizen. 18-40 years old

2/6. Pass drug screening & physical fitness test

3/6. Valid driver's license

Antifa Co., Inc. @karpovsmachine.bsky.social · 4d

I get that some people might actually like knowing how much longer the ads will be. I don't. At least give me a "Show/Hide ad timer" option somewhere.