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Jane Torbeck @janetorbeck.bsky.social · 2d

Working overseas for a few months, and every time I grab my bucket of iced coffee and climb into my massive American hire car, I sing. “Twelve yards long, two lanes wide, 65 tons of American pride! Canyonero! Canyonerooooo”

m.youtube.com/watch?v=PI_J...

The Simpsons - Canyonero

YouTube video by Waluigi

m.youtube.com

Jane Torbeck @janetorbeck.bsky.social · 2d

Old Soul by Susan Barker. Unsettling & sinister testimonies of lives torn apart over the years & across the world by an ageless woman. She takes their photo, they die with their organs & features mirrored. Plot is focused more on the destructive reverberations of the woman’s unnatural existence 🩸📚💙

The cover of Old Soul by Susan Barker. A black background with a visible slice of a cracked, mask-like white face and blank, black eye.

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Jane Torbeck @janetorbeck.bsky.social · 4d

Must try these! I love dark, interesting and weird takes on rose fragrances.

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Jane Torbeck @janetorbeck.bsky.social · 7d

Genuinely tickled that @mikebrooks668.bsky.social is getting excellent feedback on his new novel Voidscarred, and my contribution was not to the ‘extremely intelligent conversation’ about subterranean engineering, but to the sexy wild space elves not smelling like Sauvage or whatever. I’M HELPING! 🤗

Mike Brooks @mikebrooks668.bsky.social · 7d

Thank you! I must credit fellow author @janetorbeck.bsky.social who also does a lot of perfume stuff, who was very helpful when I asked “what would a sexy wild space elf smell like?”

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Jane Torbeck @janetorbeck.bsky.social · 10d

Tipped 50% at the car wash out of shame and guilt as I watched them spray off moss chunks and dislodge evil ooze from the wheel arches.

Realised it’s the first time I’ve taken my car for a proper wash.

I’ve owned it for over TEN YEARS.

(my car is a very forgiving grey and it rains a lot here? 😅)

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Jane Torbeck @janetorbeck.bsky.social · 13d

Took part in a Crystal Maze experience for my birthday. My band of creaky millennials didn’t exactly clean the place out of crystals, but Richard O’Brien didn’t lock me in an Aztec temple and leave me for dead, so at least I can finally put that childhood fear to rest 💎

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Jane Torbeck @janetorbeck.bsky.social · 17d

Staying near a restaurant I love & agonising over whether to go for known favourites (Xinjiang big plate chicken or Geleshan chicken) or try something new. Had my eye on the beancurd with salted duck egg yolk for ages, but that winter special sounds phenomenal on a miserable, wet & windy day.

A photo of a Chinese restaurant menu item, ‘deep fried beancurd with salted duck egg yolk’

A photo of a Chinese restaurant menu item, ‘stir fried lamb rib with onion, cumin and chilli’

A photo of a Chinese restaurant menu item, ‘Xinjiang big plate chicken with diced potato and hand made noodles’

A photo of a Chinese restaurant menu item, ‘Geleshan dry-fried diced chicken with peppercorn and dried chilli’

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Jane Torbeck @janetorbeck.bsky.social · 20d

I also have a bag of exciting things to dip into during my pseudo-hangover, since my colleagues kindly collated me an amazing international haul.

(I am British, but the YouTube algorithms reckoned I’d enjoy jealously watching people rate Trader Joe’s hauls and they were right. Now I have my own!)

A photo of a Trader Joe’s tote bag filled with items, including maple brown butter almonds and peanut butter caramel popcorn

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Jane Torbeck @janetorbeck.bsky.social · 20d

Had a leaving do last night, at which I had a whopping 3x half-pints and am consequently not even remotely hungover, but I’ve already committed to wallowing on the couch all day feeling like a tragic martyr, so I see no reason to change my plans.

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Jane Torbeck @janetorbeck.bsky.social · 20d

I think I’d be sort of glad they only got a few bits.. and sort of offended on behalf of my car that apparently it wasn’t good enough to steal and they were more excited about the charging cable!

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Jane Torbeck @janetorbeck.bsky.social · 22d

Me too! The park apparently has a niche in “unsettling rides in which you cling onto an unsteady plastic horse” because it’s also got a rollercoaster with that theme (Steeplechase). Which does have buckle harnesses.. but my poor stepmum once went all the way round the track without wearing hers 😂

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Jane Torbeck @janetorbeck.bsky.social · 22d

My favourite remains the Derby Racer, which is surprisingly thrilling for a carousel. Massive horses that go very fast, lots of sudden lurching and centrifugal force with no harnesses, so some hanging on is required.

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Jane Torbeck @janetorbeck.bsky.social · 22d

Had a pleasingly nostalgic day at Blackpool Pleasure Beach with my siblings. It’s a bit rough round the edges & there is some risk of getting violently mugged by the most incredibly beefy seagulls I have ever seen (making some impressive gains on a diet of pure chips), but the rides are still good!

The Derby Racer carousel at Blackpool. There are 56 large and fairly realistic racehorses that “gallop” up and down on a fast-moving, racing-themed carousel with a silver horse statue in the centre.

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Jane Torbeck @janetorbeck.bsky.social · 24d

Same, I am perfectly willing to believe that there are actually some really good Fantastic Four stories, but I have just never managed to find the enthusiasm to even let a film stream for 20 minutes in the background and see if it gets my attention.

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Jane Torbeck @janetorbeck.bsky.social · 25d

In conclusion, Bloober Team need to get a wiggle on with the Silent Hill 1 remake so I can gain more data on my true apparent age as assessed by how closely I resemble a responsible purchaser of fucked-up monster games.

(and also so I can play the Silent Hill 1 remake)

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Jane Torbeck @janetorbeck.bsky.social · 25d

Last year I bought Silent Hill 2 and got asked if it was a Christmas present for my son, today I bought Silent Hill f and got IDed under a Challenge 25 policy.

A photo of the boxes for the PlayStation 5 games Silent Hill 2 and Silent Hill f.

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Jane Torbeck @janetorbeck.bsky.social · Sep 21

You Weren’t Meant To Be Human. Raw, uncompromising & brutal horror about a pregnant trans man trapped by a cult serving an alien hive mind. A deeply troubled but tenacious protagonist clinging on by his fingernails with complex trauma that isn’t polished up to be all clean & unproblematic 🩸📚💙

The cover of You Weren’t Meant To Be Human by Andrew Joseph White. Light text on a black background, with worms slithering through the letters of the title.

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Jane Torbeck @janetorbeck.bsky.social · Sep 15

#sotd is an indie favourite- Gargoyle by Nui Cobalt. A soft, wistful blend of lavender, rain, cool stone and a very gentle cathedral incense. Very calm and tranquil, good choice for a quiet rainy evening #fragrancesky

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Jane Torbeck @janetorbeck.bsky.social · Sep 13

Me too! It’s a nice homage to the genre, and an interesting contrast with the protagonist being kind of tired and depressed and not feeling particularly sparkly and magical at all at the start of the novel.

Jane Torbeck @janetorbeck.bsky.social · Sep 13

Read A Magical Girl Retires by Park Seolyeon. Quick read about a weary millennial woman struggling with credit card debt, unrealised dreams and climate change anxiety who gets called to action as a magical girl even though she’s nearly 30. Whimsical, a little melancholic, but hopeful 🪐📚💙

The book cover for A Magical Girl Retires featuring a manhwa-inspired magical girl holding a pocket watch and a card with a rose on it

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Jane Torbeck @janetorbeck.bsky.social · Sep 7

Some interesting new smells from UK brands Rosefox Candles and Diem. Particularly excited for Quiet Riot perfume (matcha, basil, mandarin) and Southern Gothic candle (saffron, sweet tea, peach). Not sure which Diem sample will be my #sotd just yet #fragrancesky

A photo of three black Rosefox candles in a box with pink packaging. The scents are Nocturne (mandarin orange, chocolate, sandalwood), Under Your Spell (lavender, cinnamon, tonka bean) and Southern Gothic (saffron, sweet tea, peach, nutmeg, oud)

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Jane Torbeck @janetorbeck.bsky.social · Aug 31

Enjoy, I reckon you’re in for a very good time!

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Jane Torbeck @janetorbeck.bsky.social · Aug 31

One of the first books I bought online on the recommendation of goth Livejournal! I give all my Billy Martin/PZB novels a re-read every few years; wish he’d been able to continue writing, but what we got was truly excellent ❤️

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Jane Torbeck @janetorbeck.bsky.social · Aug 31

I would like to find out more, but what if the algorithms know me better than I know myself and watching Lord Farquaad do my makeup IS the key to deep and restful sleep every night? Some parts of the psyche may be best left a mystery.

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Jane Torbeck @janetorbeck.bsky.social · Aug 31

The secret fear that I may actually be the person that YouTube recommendation algorithms think I am.

A screenshot of YouTube, showing a preview of a recommended video called “ASMR - Lord Farquaad does your Makeup”. An ASMR artist in an unsettling Lord Farquaad (Shrek) mask ominously
brandishes an eyeshadow palette.

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