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James Kettle

@jameskettle.bsky.social

780 followers 30 following 430 posts

Writes the words that others say. Hair and makeup on The Moment With Miles Jupp podcast. https://www.casarotto.co.uk/clients/james-kettle

www.casarotto.co.uk

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James Kettle @jameskettle.bsky.social · 8d

Been developing this for a long time - do please try, subscribe, reskeet, ignore as you see fit

Miles Jupp to front a new satirical podcast : News 2025 : Chortle : The UK Comedy Guide

Miles Jupp to front a new satirical podcast - His first hosting gig since The News Quiz

www.chortle.co.uk

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James Kettle @jameskettle.bsky.social · 3d

If we were going out this week: “Nigel Farage has complained about the National Trust putting “vegan tampons” in their gents toilets, saying that if he has to visit Hatfield House, the least he should be able to do is punctuate the monotony by shoving an entire ham knuckle up his bottom.”

Miles Jupp to front a new satirical podcast : News 2025 : Chortle : The UK Comedy Guide

Miles Jupp to front a new satirical podcast - His first hosting gig since The News Quiz

www.chortle.co.uk

James Kettle @jameskettle.bsky.social · 5d

Come on, Toby just wants to fight for free speech, it says so on the headed notepaper

James Kettle @jameskettle.bsky.social · 5d

It’s the shit tonnes of money the Emperor has what does it

James Kettle @jameskettle.bsky.social · 5d

If we were going out this week: “The Nobel Peace Prize committee resisted pressure to give the award to Donald Trump, but when it comes to the Forward Prize for Poetry, we can expect those spineless rhyming pricks to fold up like a deckchair”

Miles Jupp to front a new satirical podcast : News 2025 : Chortle : The UK Comedy Guide

Miles Jupp to front a new satirical podcast - His first hosting gig since The News Quiz

www.chortle.co.uk

James Kettle @jameskettle.bsky.social · 6d

If we were going out this week, we might say “Kemi Badenoch wants to slash the number of university degrees, encouraging British teenagers to focus on more economically productive life choices, like becoming sentient organ banks for the aristocracy of Saudi Arabia”

Miles Jupp to front a new satirical podcast : News 2025 : Chortle : The UK Comedy Guide

Miles Jupp to front a new satirical podcast - His first hosting gig since The News Quiz

www.chortle.co.uk

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James Kettle @jameskettle.bsky.social · 7d

Don’t worry, Katie Lam MP will write another musical.

James Kettle @jameskettle.bsky.social · 7d

Then again, we might not. It’s purely hypothetical.

James Kettle @jameskettle.bsky.social · 7d

If we were starting this week, we might say something like “Robert Jenrick complained that he walked through Handsworth, and didn’t see a single person who failed to recognise him as a three day old turd that had somehow acquired the gift of speech.”

Miles Jupp to front a new satirical podcast : News 2025 : Chortle : The UK Comedy Guide

Miles Jupp to front a new satirical podcast - His first hosting gig since The News Quiz

www.chortle.co.uk

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James Kettle @jameskettle.bsky.social · 8d

Oh wow. Sorry!

James Kettle @jameskettle.bsky.social · 8d

Be like Eulalia (I am not Eulalia)

Eulalia @credacreda.bsky.social · 8d

I'll sign up as soon as it's in my feed. Just what the doctor ordered

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Reposted by James Kettle

Eulalia @credacreda.bsky.social · 8d

I'll sign up as soon as it's in my feed. Just what the doctor ordered

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James Kettle @jameskettle.bsky.social · 8d

Been developing this for a long time - do please try, subscribe, reskeet, ignore as you see fit

Miles Jupp to front a new satirical podcast : News 2025 : Chortle : The UK Comedy Guide

Miles Jupp to front a new satirical podcast - His first hosting gig since The News Quiz

www.chortle.co.uk

1 1 3

James Kettle @jameskettle.bsky.social · 10d

The big revelation for me this morning has been quite how many Railway Children musicals there are.

James Kettle @jameskettle.bsky.social · 10d

I mean tbf the way the business is going, the only way to be a writer soon will be as a side hustle to your Goldman Sachs gig on the way to being an MP, so i guess she’s just ahead of the game.

James Kettle @jameskettle.bsky.social · 10d

I wonder if she sees any connection between how hard it is to stage a musical and arts investment over the last 15 years.

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James Kettle @jameskettle.bsky.social · 10d

I may sound snobby but the bar for being described as an accomplished scriptwriter seems to have been abruptly lowered by the Guardian for their profile.

James Kettle @jameskettle.bsky.social · 10d

“She wrote the railway children musical!” “No not that one” “oh was it this one?” “No” “was it this one that was done by an amateur company for a week in Guildford” 👍

James Kettle @jameskettle.bsky.social · 11d

Unusually easy as I have just been listening to records upstairs while wife & daughter watch Strictly

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James Kettle @jameskettle.bsky.social · 12d

It’s Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve, and Eve, and another Eve and I guess another Eve (so there’s a majority)

James Kettle @jameskettle.bsky.social · 12d

Next they’ll be making us have a female DCI Jane Tennison

James Kettle @jameskettle.bsky.social · 16d

You were lucky to grow up where there were two local clubs with proud histories. Yours and Tranmere

James Kettle @jameskettle.bsky.social · 17d

There are few more cherished beliefs in the north than the idea that people in other parts of the country do not identify with their own local football club

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James Kettle @jameskettle.bsky.social · 18d

Much quieter in this photo than it was the day of the British Grand Prix

James Kettle @jameskettle.bsky.social · 20d

The blackadder the third rule applies to the PLP, in that a lot of people won’t be in favour of Andy because they’ve met him

James Kettle @jameskettle.bsky.social · 20d

I thought this was your response to
“Tory coded things I like”

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