Ineffable Quote Bot
@ineffablebot.bsky.social
Out of context Good Omens quotes
- unofficial - not spoiler free -
- unofficial - not spoiler free -
Pinned
Sarcasm. We'll work on it next time.
February 17, 2026 at 3:35 AM
Sarcasm. We'll work on it next time.
Can I just say that I do only allow myself one tiny weeny miracle? Just to warm the audience and myself. Um... For instance, turning a common turnip into an inkwell. But before... that, everything... I do is accomplished by... skillful conjuring alone.
February 16, 2026 at 11:35 PM
Can I just say that I do only allow myself one tiny weeny miracle? Just to warm the audience and myself. Um... For instance, turning a common turnip into an inkwell. But before... that, everything... I do is accomplished by... skillful conjuring alone.
When Aziraphale does come back, I think we need a little us time. After all this, I think we are going for an extremely alcoholic breakfast at the Ritz.
February 16, 2026 at 7:35 PM
When Aziraphale does come back, I think we need a little us time. After all this, I think we are going for an extremely alcoholic breakfast at the Ritz.
There is! There you are! You have sinned very bigly! Trying to kill yourself is... I mean... it's... it's not on! If you dare try to snuff yourself again, you are damned forever! Unless... Unless? Unless... How much have you got in your wallet?
February 16, 2026 at 3:35 PM
There is! There you are! You have sinned very bigly! Trying to kill yourself is... I mean... it's... it's not on! If you dare try to snuff yourself again, you are damned forever! Unless... Unless? Unless... How much have you got in your wallet?
That's very, very professional of you.
February 16, 2026 at 11:35 AM
That's very, very professional of you.
Oh, that might get messy. Oh...
February 16, 2026 at 7:35 AM
Oh, that might get messy. Oh...
And that was the last I was to see of Crowley for quite some time.
February 16, 2026 at 3:35 AM
And that was the last I was to see of Crowley for quite some time.
It's not the travelling— it's the arriving that matters.
February 15, 2026 at 11:35 PM
It's not the travelling— it's the arriving that matters.
"Whatever you've found out, don't call it a "Clue"."
"But it is a Clue."
"Well, at least don't pronounce the capital letter."
"But it is a Clue."
"Well, at least don't pronounce the capital letter."
February 15, 2026 at 7:35 PM
"Whatever you've found out, don't call it a "Clue"."
"But it is a Clue."
"Well, at least don't pronounce the capital letter."
"But it is a Clue."
"Well, at least don't pronounce the capital letter."
Stay your hand, Demon! Despised tool of Satan, in the name of Almighty God! Avaunt! Oh... It's you. Dear me. Haven't seen you since... the flood?
February 15, 2026 at 3:35 PM
Stay your hand, Demon! Despised tool of Satan, in the name of Almighty God! Avaunt! Oh... It's you. Dear me. Haven't seen you since... the flood?
Well, yes. You’re a demon, you’ve got a job to do. Obviously, you’re not actually going to get ill, or even spread a disease, but you could set a bad example. Get ominously close to people. Tell everyone there’s a party going on or... something.
February 15, 2026 at 11:35 AM
Well, yes. You’re a demon, you’ve got a job to do. Obviously, you’re not actually going to get ill, or even spread a disease, but you could set a bad example. Get ominously close to people. Tell everyone there’s a party going on or... something.
I don't like it any more than you do, but I told you. I can't diso... not do what I'm told. I'm an angel. I... I can't cope with this while I'm drunk.
February 15, 2026 at 7:35 AM
I don't like it any more than you do, but I told you. I can't diso... not do what I'm told. I'm an angel. I... I can't cope with this while I'm drunk.
Aziraphale held up the sword. There was a whoomph as it suddenly flamed like a bar of magnesium. "Once you've learned how to do it, you never forget," he said.
February 15, 2026 at 3:35 AM
Aziraphale held up the sword. There was a whoomph as it suddenly flamed like a bar of magnesium. "Once you've learned how to do it, you never forget," he said.
I, I suppose I, um... I might have done a miracle.
February 14, 2026 at 11:35 PM
I, I suppose I, um... I might have done a miracle.
"Seats? Mr. Fell, where are the seats I dropped off for the meeting?"
"No point."
"No point?"
"We'd only have to move them away again when the dancing begins, wouldn't we? Better to keep them for later."
"Dancing?"
"No point."
"No point?"
"We'd only have to move them away again when the dancing begins, wouldn't we? Better to keep them for later."
"Dancing?"
February 14, 2026 at 7:35 PM
"Seats? Mr. Fell, where are the seats I dropped off for the meeting?"
"No point."
"No point?"
"We'd only have to move them away again when the dancing begins, wouldn't we? Better to keep them for later."
"Dancing?"
"No point."
"No point?"
"We'd only have to move them away again when the dancing begins, wouldn't we? Better to keep them for later."
"Dancing?"
I'm afraid we're quite definitely closed.
February 14, 2026 at 3:35 PM
I'm afraid we're quite definitely closed.
Little demonic miracle of my own. Lift home?
February 14, 2026 at 11:35 AM
Little demonic miracle of my own. Lift home?
“Ask him properly! What... are you... doing... in... this... book… shop?!”
“I... am... dusting.”
“I... am... dusting.”
February 14, 2026 at 7:35 AM
“Ask him properly! What... are you... doing... in... this... book… shop?!”
“I... am... dusting.”
“I... am... dusting.”
You don't dance.
February 14, 2026 at 3:35 AM
You don't dance.
Something's happening. Something's wrong.
February 13, 2026 at 11:35 PM
Something's happening. Something's wrong.
Just don't, uh, tell anybody about any of this. Not that anyone would ever believe a word of it.
February 13, 2026 at 7:35 PM
Just don't, uh, tell anybody about any of this. Not that anyone would ever believe a word of it.
“That's not a nice word.”
“All the other words I have for you are worse.”
“All the other words I have for you are worse.”
February 13, 2026 at 3:35 PM
“That's not a nice word.”
“All the other words I have for you are worse.”
“All the other words I have for you are worse.”
"Vavoom?"
"That's the plan, yeah."
"That's the plan, yeah."
February 13, 2026 at 11:35 AM
"Vavoom?"
"That's the plan, yeah."
"That's the plan, yeah."
“I would like to purchase one of your material objects.”
“Books.”
“Books. Let us discuss my purchase in a private place, because I am buying, er…"
“Pornography?”
“Pornography.”
“Books.”
“Books. Let us discuss my purchase in a private place, because I am buying, er…"
“Pornography?”
“Pornography.”
February 13, 2026 at 7:35 AM
“I would like to purchase one of your material objects.”
“Books.”
“Books. Let us discuss my purchase in a private place, because I am buying, er…"
“Pornography?”
“Pornography.”
“Books.”
“Books. Let us discuss my purchase in a private place, because I am buying, er…"
“Pornography?”
“Pornography.”
Crowley had dark hair and good cheekbones and he was wearing snakeskin shoes, or at least presumably he was wearing shoes, and he could do really weird things with his tongue. And, whenever he forgot himself, he had a tendency to hiss.
He also didn't blink much.
He also didn't blink much.
February 13, 2026 at 3:35 AM
Crowley had dark hair and good cheekbones and he was wearing snakeskin shoes, or at least presumably he was wearing shoes, and he could do really weird things with his tongue. And, whenever he forgot himself, he had a tendency to hiss.
He also didn't blink much.
He also didn't blink much.