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Bridge

@iebrdgt.bsky.social

370 followers 360 following 2.5K posts

median income. 6’3. the nation’s favourite surface disinfectant. they/them 🦧

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Bridge @iebrdgt.bsky.social · Nov 12

How you spend your gays is how your spend your queers

Bridge @iebrdgt.bsky.social · 7h

6am smoke crack 6.03am kill wife 6.10am breakfast gin 7.30am kill journalist 10am pose for iconic photograph representing timeless class

Bridge @iebrdgt.bsky.social · 7h

i've had a very nice kiss in a very scary alleyway

Bridge @iebrdgt.bsky.social · 13h

me: grazed my knuckl-

'assorted' plasters: stabbed in the neck?

Bridge @iebrdgt.bsky.social · 13h

Yes boss, assorted, just like you asked. A wonderful assortment - of the biggest plasters you've ever seen in your life! ☝️😎

Bridge @iebrdgt.bsky.social · 13h

'Assorted' plasters manufacturers are clearly imagining that we all suffer a great many life-changing injuries

Bridge @iebrdgt.bsky.social · 14h

I have received pronunciation ✝️

Bridge @iebrdgt.bsky.social · 17h

(five mins later in the kitchen) So bare in mind i had taken a lot of 2CP before the ceremony,

Bridge @iebrdgt.bsky.social · 17h

I’m afraid I’ve already told you all my good stories that don’t involve me being a feral crackhead, so I’m going to be getting on with my work if you dont mind

Reposted by Bridge

Dan McPainInTheKnees @danmckee.bsky.social · 19h

“What’s the charge? Eating a seal?”

Reposted by Bridge

Bridge @iebrdgt.bsky.social · 1d

Many groups are expressing anxiety about being blown by the sucking off community

Bridge @iebrdgt.bsky.social · 1d

pudding's coming everyone 💦

Bridge @iebrdgt.bsky.social · 1d

if you're 30-45 minutes late the meal's coming 30-45 minutes later too

Bridge @iebrdgt.bsky.social · 1d

no alcohol either and you can't smoke out the window 🤗 BRIDGE apétit!

Bridge @iebrdgt.bsky.social · 1d

dinner guests often dazzled by my ability to insist they arrive at 7 and not put any food in front of them until about 9.45

Bridge @iebrdgt.bsky.social · 1d

Many groups are expressing anxiety about being blown by the sucking off community

Bridge @iebrdgt.bsky.social · 1d

recalling the time a woman's robot hoover switched itself on and charted a direct course between my legs

Bridge @iebrdgt.bsky.social · Mar 13

There’s no easy way to say this. I was attacked by a roomba while having sex on the floor

Bridge @iebrdgt.bsky.social · 1d

Bridge @iebrdgt.bsky.social · 1d

You’ve got a new message, please check your online banking inbox. Stand against the wall and put your hands behind your head.

Bridge @iebrdgt.bsky.social · 1d

We’ve detected a change in your credit score. Stand against the wall and put your hands behind your head.

Bridge @iebrdgt.bsky.social · 2d

I’ve got my starter venomous at the moment. Borderline acrid. Fails the sniff test as often as it passes. The sweet spot.

Bridge @iebrdgt.bsky.social · 2d

Todays loaf 🍞

Nothing fancy - just wholemeal!

Reposted by Bridge

Bridge @iebrdgt.bsky.social · 2d

passé income

Bridge @iebrdgt.bsky.social · 2d

locomotion tonite? 👀

do the locomotion tonight queen?

locomotion tonight? 👀

Bridge @iebrdgt.bsky.social · 2d

Pretty brutal actually. She bought a house in a different city for them to live in and he didn't like it so suggested a trial separation then she found out from a friend weeks later that he'd been calling it permanent, then he blocked her AND he took the dog. Nevertheless; self-control babe...

Bridge @iebrdgt.bsky.social · 2d

Friend who got dumped is cycling through facebook profile pictures at a concerning rate. Just keep the close up of your eye bathed in golden hour sunlight until you get over him queen