Author | Lightnews

Dmitry @dmitry.mclachbot.com · 1d

I mean, it's from the RBL official website. I don't know why they would have incentives to lie about it.

Dmitry @dmitry.mclachbot.com · 1d

He's a crazy stat for you. At 58 kg, he'd be in a three way tie for the fourth lightest player on the *Chelsea women's* team

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Dmitry @dmitry.mclachbot.com · 1d

Anyway, here's a Claude AI generated list of all the players Chelsea have signed from Bundesliga since 2000, and I'll let you be the judge on how many of these actually turned out to be worth it.

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Dmitry @dmitry.mclachbot.com · 1d

And no, to preempt the inevitable replies, it's not because Frank is a defensive manager. This level of ineptitude transcends style. I think it simply comes down to the fact that he's physically overmatched in the premier league

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Dmitry @dmitry.mclachbot.com · 1d

Now, Xavi Simons OTOH has been pure garbage. Aside from being kind of active defensively which is think is more a reflection of how Thomas Frank sets up than his own skill, there's nothing there.

Anyway, I collectively refer to this chart as Shit Butterfly

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Dmitry @dmitry.mclachbot.com · 1d

He's been quite unlucky that Liverpool haven't been finishing the chances that he's created and that his own shooting is ice cold. Now, is 0.44 good enough considering his price? Not even close. But you can see the framework of a good premier league player there.

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Dmitry @dmitry.mclachbot.com · 1d

Over the weekend someone pointed out to me that both Xavi Simons and Florian Wirtz have been found out as physically unusable in the premier league and I don't think it's exactly right. Wirtz actually had decent underlying numbers - he's xG+xA p90 is 0.44.

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Dmitry @dmitry.mclachbot.com · 4d

I don't really know what we're to do with the fact that Aaron Anselmino appears to both be very good and also literally made our of papier mache

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Dmitry @dmitry.mclachbot.com · 5d

I don't even have a picture for Panichelli in my database yet but the guy is putting up ridiculous numbers. Strasbourg aren't going to miss Emegha at all when he moves to Chelsea.

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Dmitry @dmitry.mclachbot.com · 6d

Tosin yesterday lost 3 out of 4 aerial duels in or near our penalty box yesterday, which is just brutal considering that being a tall guy who wins headers is his entire raison d'etre

(Red triangle - aerial duel lost, green triangle - aerial duel won)

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Dmitry @dmitry.mclachbot.com · 14d

You're right, I would enjoy this given that I've written basically the same article four years ago 🤣

On Orange Slices, Hypothesis Testing and Misfiring Strikers | by Dmitry Mogilevsky | Medium share.google/IpMC5vaOzJSh...

On Orange Slices, Hypothesis Testing and Misfiring Strikers

Big thanks to @KierDoyle who gave me a lot of ideas to think about while I was writing this

share.google

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Dmitry @dmitry.mclachbot.com · Sep 28

what do you think?

Dmitry @dmitry.mclachbot.com · Sep 19

Yeah, this should be fixed soon

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Dmitry @dmitry.mclachbot.com · Sep 3

Most of it is, there's one key component that has to be run locally

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Dmitry @dmitry.mclachbot.com · Aug 31

I cannot wait to see what kind of dumb shit this club tries to do tomorrow!

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Dmitry @dmitry.mclachbot.com · Aug 30

Wait, Michael you mean to tell me that João Palhinha isn't suitable as the locus of your progressive passing game from deep midfield?!

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Dmitry @dmitry.mclachbot.com · Aug 28

Baku away, lets go!!

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Dmitry @dmitry.mclachbot.com · Aug 10

See, totally wish I didn't learn that today.

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Dmitry @dmitry.mclachbot.com · Aug 9

Should I add @mclachbot.com outputs to this?

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Dmitry @dmitry.mclachbot.com · Aug 9

I'm still refining the process. Will respond when I'm actually happy with the outcome

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Dmitry @dmitry.mclachbot.com · Aug 9

I'm really happy for people to take any individual graphics and use them as part of their analysis in any form they like as long as the graphics themselves aren't modified 👍

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Dmitry @dmitry.mclachbot.com · Aug 8

Ok, this is the nerdiest thing I'll ever admit here, but I tried asking ChatGPT to run a D&D campaign for me acting as a DM... And it's pretty good?

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Dmitry @dmitry.mclachbot.com · Aug 5

Euphoria followed by disappointment

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Dmitry @dmitry.mclachbot.com · Aug 5

As a final point, I do want to share this absolutely hilarious shot map.

This is clearly a Roberto Carlos homage.

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Dmitry @dmitry.mclachbot.com · Aug 5

People on twitter telling me it just means they're good finishers

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