Author | Lightnews

Dave Powers @davepowers.bsky.social · 14d

Happy to see you covering Helix! I think there's probably a lot of overlap between fish and helix appreciators. 🐟🤝🧬
Easy LSP setup was definitely a draw for me as well, and I may borrow that reflow shortcut for my own config.

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Dave Powers @davepowers.bsky.social · 25d

Perfect way to celebrate the final episode of the Scorigami documentary series 🤝

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Dave Powers @davepowers.bsky.social · Sep 11

I know people may be preoccupied with other news tonight, but I would like to humbly share that I ran a ~6:30 donut mile this evening (my first of this such event). 🍩🏃

Reposted by Dave Powers

Nim @nimesha.bsky.social · Jul 20

Imagine being named FRANK Kafka

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Dave Powers @davepowers.bsky.social · Jul 18

Actually screw it, that dude made it so I can never enjoy "a night out on the town to listen to Coldplay with the boys" without raising *major* suspicion.

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Dave Powers @davepowers.bsky.social · Jul 18

Coldplay's Chris Martin has a rich history of philanthropy, which is why he should cover that tech CEO's forthcoming divorce attorney fees as an act of good faith.

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Dave Powers @davepowers.bsky.social · Jul 6

Halfway through my good friend’s wedding and I’ve already sweated through my Men’s Wearhouse dress shirt rental to the point that I’m concerned they will deem it a total loss.

Dave Powers @davepowers.bsky.social · Jun 24

- jacktheripper
- jiggy
- kotex
- moles
- poorwhitetrash
- protestant
- satan
- sixsixsix
- trisexual (but not "bisexual")
- whiskeydick
- whitey
- estupido
- estupida
- lameass

Every time someone goes to schedule an appointment at this bank, they send ~10KB of swears and slurs over the internet.

Dave Powers @davepowers.bsky.social · Jun 24

Naturally, I dug through the source code to find all 1,139 `blackListedWords` (their naming).

My select favorites:
- assclown
- asscowboy
- boom
- butterball
- commie
- dildo
- dildoe
- dildoes
- dildos
- greaseball
- hitler
- hitlerism
- hitlerist
- homosexual (but not "heterosexual")

(cont.)

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Dave Powers @davepowers.bsky.social · Jun 24

Did you know that a major bank in America (🏦 of 🇺🇸, 👀) has a client-side validation on their appointment scheduling form to censor profanity?

(Actual results)

Before:
"Hello, I would like to move some assets"

After:
"####o, I would like to move some ###ets"

What other terms are banned, you ask?

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Dave Powers @davepowers.bsky.social · Jun 18

Now my Karen Read verdict thoughts!
- unfortunate the shoddy investigation prevented real answers
- clever move by defense team to ask for OUI charge inclusion
- leaving court to raucous cheers and applause after getting convicted of drunk driving is too Massachusetts for me (as a lifelong resident)

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Dave Powers @davepowers.bsky.social · Jun 13

My Karen Read trial thoughts (as someone following the story since the day it broke):
- heaps and heaps of reasonable doubt
- Sue O’Connell of NBC10 is a legend
- please do not let this show get renewed for a third season

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Dave Powers @davepowers.bsky.social · May 29

An Ocean's film series-style "getting the gang back together" montage but it's you re-enlisting your original groomsmen for your post-divorce second wedding

Dave Powers @davepowers.bsky.social · May 26

"It's honestly pretty easy once you get down to five."

- My friend who was dog sitting seven dogs earlier in the day and had since dropped off two of them

Dave Powers @davepowers.bsky.social · May 19

Like getting added as an authorized user to someone's credit card to try and boost your score, except it's getting added to group Airbnb trips to generate ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ reviews that bury the ones claiming you left noodles on the floor.

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Dave Powers @davepowers.bsky.social · Apr 25

With the fourth pick of the 2025 NFL draft, the New England Patriots select the first white guy available.

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Dave Powers @davepowers.bsky.social · Apr 15

Bon Iver Got Happy - and Sexy

Bon Iver Got Happy - and Sexy

Bon Iver Got Happy - and Sexy

Bon Iver Got Happy - and Sexy

Bon Iver Got Happy - an–

Screenshot from YouTube with title "Bon Iver Got Happy - and Sexy (It Took a Lot of Work): Full Justin Vernon Interview" from the Popcast channel. Video thumbnail includes stylized photos of Bon Iver with text in all caps "Bon Iver Speaks!"

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Dave Powers @davepowers.bsky.social · Apr 1

I got a new license and my photo has way too much headroom. I am fine with my tax dollars going to the Department of Motor Vehicles in support of additional framing and composition training.

Dave Powers @davepowers.bsky.social · Mar 3

Any chumps still on Facebook Marketplace are missing out on the real deals over on Freecycle.

Two Hats. Can't get any better than that, right?

Wrong!

Two More Hats. Right when you think the free hats have ended.

Screenshot from Freecycle showing two offers: "Two Hats" and "Two More Hats"

The first photo is a black bowler hat, and the second photo is a brown park ranger hat.

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Dave Powers @davepowers.bsky.social · Feb 20

Peloton operating expenses:

- 10% rent for NYC studio space
- 15% salaries for fitness instructors
- 75% royalties paid to Papa Roach for the privilege of playing "Last Resort" during every class

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Dave Powers @davepowers.bsky.social · Feb 3

Very pleased with the recent trend of having trailers for commercials, as well as sequels to commercials.

Normally, every 30-second advert, I have to ask myself "who are these characters? What is their backstory, their motivation?"

Now I will be prepared.

Dave Powers @davepowers.bsky.social · Jan 27

According to tradition, if the Bills lose to the Chiefs in the playoffs, there will be six more months of winter in Buffalo.

Dave Powers @davepowers.bsky.social · Dec 31

My health insurance is changing for the new year so I think I'll carry both my old and new card tonight along with a "see other pocket if after midnight" note in case I get scooped up by EMTs and they try to bill the wrong plan.

Dave Powers @davepowers.bsky.social · Dec 3

For any organizations participating in this Giving Tuesday, add the following to your donation form to maximize your charitable impact:

☑️ Check this box to quadruple your contribution and never be contacted again

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Dave Powers @davepowers.bsky.social · Nov 25

The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago.

The second best time was 19 years and 364 days ago.

The third best time was 19 years and 363 days ago.

The fourth best time was 19 years and 362 days ago.

The fifth best time was 19 years and 361 days ago.

The sixth best time was 19 years and –

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