Dad Joke A Day
@dadjokeaday.bsky.social
Bot Account posting a joke a day from https://icanhazdadjoke.com/
Created by @davemcpherson.dev
https://github.com/DMcP89/bsky-jokeaday
Created by @davemcpherson.dev
https://github.com/DMcP89/bsky-jokeaday
Why do crabs never give to charity? Because they’re shellfish.
November 10, 2025 at 9:08 AM
Why do crabs never give to charity? Because they’re shellfish.
I just broke my guitar. It's okay, I won't fret
November 9, 2025 at 9:05 AM
I just broke my guitar. It's okay, I won't fret
What did the judge say to the dentist? Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
November 8, 2025 at 9:05 AM
What did the judge say to the dentist? Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
What is a vampire's favorite fruit? A blood orange.
November 7, 2025 at 9:06 AM
What is a vampire's favorite fruit? A blood orange.
What do you call a fashionable lawn statue with an excellent sense of rhythmn? A metro-gnome
November 6, 2025 at 9:07 AM
What do you call a fashionable lawn statue with an excellent sense of rhythmn? A metro-gnome
I always wanted to look into why I procrastinate, but I keep putting it off.
November 5, 2025 at 9:07 AM
I always wanted to look into why I procrastinate, but I keep putting it off.
What kind of pants do ghosts wear? Boo jeans.
November 4, 2025 at 9:07 AM
What kind of pants do ghosts wear? Boo jeans.
What's a ninja's favorite type of shoes? Sneakers!
November 3, 2025 at 9:07 AM
What's a ninja's favorite type of shoes? Sneakers!
What did the shy pebble wish for? That she was a little boulder.
November 2, 2025 at 9:05 AM
What did the shy pebble wish for? That she was a little boulder.
What do you get if you cross a turkey with a ghost? A poultry-geist!
November 1, 2025 at 9:05 AM
What do you get if you cross a turkey with a ghost? A poultry-geist!
What is worse then finding a worm in your Apple? Finding half a worm in your Apple.
October 31, 2025 at 9:06 AM
What is worse then finding a worm in your Apple? Finding half a worm in your Apple.
Did you hear the one about the giant pickle? He was kind of a big dill.
October 30, 2025 at 9:06 AM
Did you hear the one about the giant pickle? He was kind of a big dill.
What did Romans use to cut pizza before the rolling cutter was invented? Lil Caesars
October 29, 2025 at 9:06 AM
What did Romans use to cut pizza before the rolling cutter was invented? Lil Caesars
I've started telling everyone about the benefits of eating dried grapes. It's all about raisin awareness.
October 28, 2025 at 9:06 AM
I've started telling everyone about the benefits of eating dried grapes. It's all about raisin awareness.
What kind of dinosaur loves to sleep? A stega-snore-us.
October 27, 2025 at 9:07 AM
What kind of dinosaur loves to sleep? A stega-snore-us.
The biggest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from eating too much pi.
October 26, 2025 at 9:05 AM
The biggest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from eating too much pi.
I've been trying to come up with a dad joke about momentum . . . but I just can't seem to get it going.
October 25, 2025 at 9:05 AM
I've been trying to come up with a dad joke about momentum . . . but I just can't seem to get it going.
What's the difference between a rooster and a crow? A rooster can crow but a crow cannot rooster.
October 24, 2025 at 9:07 AM
What's the difference between a rooster and a crow? A rooster can crow but a crow cannot rooster.
Don't buy flowers at a monastery. Because only you can prevent florist friars.
October 23, 2025 at 9:06 AM
Don't buy flowers at a monastery. Because only you can prevent florist friars.
Did you hear about the bread factory burning down? They say the business is toast.
October 22, 2025 at 9:07 AM
Did you hear about the bread factory burning down? They say the business is toast.
As I suspected, someone has been adding soil to my garden. The plot thickens.
October 21, 2025 at 9:06 AM
As I suspected, someone has been adding soil to my garden. The plot thickens.
Yesterday I confused the words "jacuzzi" and "yakuza". Now I'm in hot water with the Japanese mafia.
October 20, 2025 at 9:09 AM
Yesterday I confused the words "jacuzzi" and "yakuza". Now I'm in hot water with the Japanese mafia.
What's the difference between a guitar and a fish? You can tune a guitar but you can't "tuna" fish!
October 19, 2025 at 9:05 AM
What's the difference between a guitar and a fish? You can tune a guitar but you can't "tuna" fish!
I’m only familiar with 25 letters in the English language. I don’t know why.
October 18, 2025 at 9:05 AM
I’m only familiar with 25 letters in the English language. I don’t know why.
Why did the half blind man fall in the well? Because he couldn't see that well!
October 17, 2025 at 9:07 AM
Why did the half blind man fall in the well? Because he couldn't see that well!