Cuddle Whore
@cuddlewhore.bsky.social
Captain of the touchy feely cuddly squad.
Don't get too close, I'll hug you and love you and call you George.
Don't get too close, I'll hug you and love you and call you George.
This building is weird. It's winter coat weather and half of this building has their window air conditioners running
November 25, 2025 at 5:38 PM
This building is weird. It's winter coat weather and half of this building has their window air conditioners running
Starting to think I should just carry a bag of rocks in my car for obnoxious drivers
November 21, 2025 at 8:28 PM
Starting to think I should just carry a bag of rocks in my car for obnoxious drivers
Don't go flipping your hair at me. You think that'll get you what you want? Because it will.
November 21, 2025 at 6:36 PM
Don't go flipping your hair at me. You think that'll get you what you want? Because it will.
Ever fake talking on your cell phone when you walk into a store to avoid someone and 5 minutes later realize you're still holding your phone up talking to yourself?
Me neither.
Me neither.
November 20, 2025 at 8:15 PM
Ever fake talking on your cell phone when you walk into a store to avoid someone and 5 minutes later realize you're still holding your phone up talking to yourself?
Me neither.
Me neither.
I just made a havarti/mozza with ham french toast sandwich and I don't know why I don't do that more often.
November 19, 2025 at 9:08 PM
I just made a havarti/mozza with ham french toast sandwich and I don't know why I don't do that more often.
I have mixed feelings about turning a milestone page, but I can say at least I'm aging up like Steve Carell.
November 16, 2025 at 8:58 PM
I have mixed feelings about turning a milestone page, but I can say at least I'm aging up like Steve Carell.
The rest of this month is gonna be a balls to the wall no stop stress fest. But today is a take an edible, eat the snacks and soak in the peace day
November 16, 2025 at 8:56 PM
The rest of this month is gonna be a balls to the wall no stop stress fest. But today is a take an edible, eat the snacks and soak in the peace day
They say you don't choose your family but you choose your friends. And I hit the lottery on the ones that I'm privileged to call mine.
I don't know what I'd do without them. That's it.
I don't know what I'd do without them. That's it.
November 13, 2025 at 8:34 PM
They say you don't choose your family but you choose your friends. And I hit the lottery on the ones that I'm privileged to call mine.
I don't know what I'd do without them. That's it.
I don't know what I'd do without them. That's it.
6 hours down, 13 to go
November 12, 2025 at 7:52 PM
6 hours down, 13 to go
I've been in an airport or on a plane for 1,483 hours today
November 12, 2025 at 2:17 AM
I've been in an airport or on a plane for 1,483 hours today
"Let's make sure you're not a robot...click on every one of these 75 pictures that have a bike...oh, and none of the pictures look like they have bikes cause they're blurry...
HA!!! there's a fraction of a tire in that where's waldo crowd pic behind the 3 trucks
YOU'RE A ROBOT AREN'T YOU???"
HA!!! there's a fraction of a tire in that where's waldo crowd pic behind the 3 trucks
YOU'RE A ROBOT AREN'T YOU???"
November 10, 2025 at 6:53 PM
"Let's make sure you're not a robot...click on every one of these 75 pictures that have a bike...oh, and none of the pictures look like they have bikes cause they're blurry...
HA!!! there's a fraction of a tire in that where's waldo crowd pic behind the 3 trucks
YOU'RE A ROBOT AREN'T YOU???"
HA!!! there's a fraction of a tire in that where's waldo crowd pic behind the 3 trucks
YOU'RE A ROBOT AREN'T YOU???"
I have to fly half way across the country tomorrow. Then fly all the way back the next day. At least I'll get my audiobook finished.
November 10, 2025 at 6:14 PM
I have to fly half way across the country tomorrow. Then fly all the way back the next day. At least I'll get my audiobook finished.
You know you've still got it when you make turkey soup from scratch with Turkey leftovers and every kid comes wandering out throughout the day saying "what smells SO GOOD"
November 6, 2025 at 12:13 AM
You know you've still got it when you make turkey soup from scratch with Turkey leftovers and every kid comes wandering out throughout the day saying "what smells SO GOOD"
Only 228 days til summer
November 5, 2025 at 7:30 PM
Only 228 days til summer
Sometimes you have to go where to came from to appreciate where you are.
October 27, 2025 at 10:41 PM
Sometimes you have to go where to came from to appreciate where you are.
I have a turkey hangover
October 14, 2025 at 3:35 PM
I have a turkey hangover
I saw a little girl kiss a puppy today and the innocent joy made me cry.
There's too much stress, crowds, people, hatred, traffic, anger, injustice. Evil.
There's no rest. Not enough love, forgiveness, joy, money, peace.
I'm tired of struggling and feeling overwhelmed about everything.
There's too much stress, crowds, people, hatred, traffic, anger, injustice. Evil.
There's no rest. Not enough love, forgiveness, joy, money, peace.
I'm tired of struggling and feeling overwhelmed about everything.
October 10, 2025 at 7:32 PM
I saw a little girl kiss a puppy today and the innocent joy made me cry.
There's too much stress, crowds, people, hatred, traffic, anger, injustice. Evil.
There's no rest. Not enough love, forgiveness, joy, money, peace.
I'm tired of struggling and feeling overwhelmed about everything.
There's too much stress, crowds, people, hatred, traffic, anger, injustice. Evil.
There's no rest. Not enough love, forgiveness, joy, money, peace.
I'm tired of struggling and feeling overwhelmed about everything.
We don't deserve dogs.
Though we do sometimes have to shave their asses to get the dried poop off.
Though we do sometimes have to shave their asses to get the dried poop off.
October 1, 2025 at 8:01 PM
We don't deserve dogs.
Though we do sometimes have to shave their asses to get the dried poop off.
Though we do sometimes have to shave their asses to get the dried poop off.
Ok, I spent the afternoon cooking food. Somebody please be impressed
September 29, 2025 at 12:29 AM
Ok, I spent the afternoon cooking food. Somebody please be impressed
Me: I'm gonna have the best sleep ever tonight
Universe: BAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA YOU WEAK PATHETIC FOOL (SNORT LAUGHS) BAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Universe: BAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA YOU WEAK PATHETIC FOOL (SNORT LAUGHS) BAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
September 27, 2025 at 3:33 PM
Me: I'm gonna have the best sleep ever tonight
Universe: BAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA YOU WEAK PATHETIC FOOL (SNORT LAUGHS) BAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Universe: BAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA YOU WEAK PATHETIC FOOL (SNORT LAUGHS) BAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Ok Short Round, show me what a bad ass you can be
September 27, 2025 at 3:31 AM
Ok Short Round, show me what a bad ass you can be
I get to bachelor this weekend and I don't even know what to do first
September 26, 2025 at 8:06 PM
I get to bachelor this weekend and I don't even know what to do first
No no, Mr Tailgater guy, after YOU...enjoy pulling your big truck into the other lane and roaring past me in victory, the red light ahead will be happy to see you get there first.
Oh look, on an unrelated note, my lane has less cars at the red light and wouldn't you know it...now I'm 5 cars ahead.
Oh look, on an unrelated note, my lane has less cars at the red light and wouldn't you know it...now I'm 5 cars ahead.
September 24, 2025 at 6:51 PM
No no, Mr Tailgater guy, after YOU...enjoy pulling your big truck into the other lane and roaring past me in victory, the red light ahead will be happy to see you get there first.
Oh look, on an unrelated note, my lane has less cars at the red light and wouldn't you know it...now I'm 5 cars ahead.
Oh look, on an unrelated note, my lane has less cars at the red light and wouldn't you know it...now I'm 5 cars ahead.
Me: I miss the vending machine in the office
<they put it in>
Me: $2 for 4 potato chips? Get rid of this thing!! Pfft!
<they put it in>
Me: $2 for 4 potato chips? Get rid of this thing!! Pfft!
September 24, 2025 at 5:47 PM
Me: I miss the vending machine in the office
<they put it in>
Me: $2 for 4 potato chips? Get rid of this thing!! Pfft!
<they put it in>
Me: $2 for 4 potato chips? Get rid of this thing!! Pfft!
I'm buying a wrench, I don't also want socks or an extended warranty, I don't want to upgrade, I don't want home delivery or your stupid points card or monopoly money or to have to find a coupon on the app, or to do a survey or your fucking credit card. Here's my $5. Just let me pay and fuck off
September 19, 2025 at 6:15 PM
I'm buying a wrench, I don't also want socks or an extended warranty, I don't want to upgrade, I don't want home delivery or your stupid points card or monopoly money or to have to find a coupon on the app, or to do a survey or your fucking credit card. Here's my $5. Just let me pay and fuck off