Lightnews — Scholar-powered news

Crotch Fat

@crotchfat.bsky.social

47 followers 140 following 270 posts

Sandwiches

Posts Media Videos Starter Packs

Pinned

Crotch Fat @crotchfat.bsky.social · 1d

Measure my life twice into pieces
This is my penultimate resort

Crotch Fat @crotchfat.bsky.social · 2h

James Franklin to Maryland to complete the Friedgen Prophecy

Crotch Fat @crotchfat.bsky.social · 2h

Yeah when I said "a choice" I guess I also meant "apparently a lifestyle"?

Crotch Fat @crotchfat.bsky.social · 4h

Wasn't that in Parable of the Talents? I'm pretty sure it is. Using Octavia Butler's dystopian fiction as an instruction manual is... a choice.

1 3

Crotch Fat @crotchfat.bsky.social · 4h

What an absolutely airtight goof. Truly the Who's On First of human fallibility. Ha ha ha ha ha ha (goes extinct)

Crotch Fat @crotchfat.bsky.social · 4h

Get it? Because we have literally nothing else going for us except the color of the skin we were born with? Because we're utterly useless and deeply unnecessary to the ongoing project of human existence and yet we somehow imagine ourselves superior in literally any meaningful way? THAT old chestnut?

Crotch Fat @crotchfat.bsky.social · 4h

Ah yes, the classic joke format of pervasive and violent white supremacy.

Crotch Fat @crotchfat.bsky.social · 7h

You really need to check your feminist bona fides if you're going to publicly criticize great women like Olivia Nuzzi or JK Rowling or Leni Riefenstahl

1 20

Crotch Fat @crotchfat.bsky.social · 8h

Today's example of the "sometimes you need coffee in order to make coffee" paradox: I poured whole beans into the water tank

Crotch Fat @crotchfat.bsky.social · 16h

The time has come to finally award the Presidential Medal to the Lindbergh baby

1 22

Crotch Fat @crotchfat.bsky.social · 16h

Does watching a clip of Cory Booker wilting under direct questioning still count as giving any time or thought to Cory Booker? Because my instinct is yes it is and no thanks.

Crotch Fat @crotchfat.bsky.social · 19h

Finding out about D'Angelo from my white suburban boomer mom is fucking my head up

Crotch Fat @crotchfat.bsky.social · 1d

Measure my life twice into pieces
This is my penultimate resort

Crotch Fat @crotchfat.bsky.social · 2d

Celebrating Columbus Day the traditional way: by impulse buying a matinee ticket to see Tron and entering the theater 20 minutes before showtime to witness a blowjob in progress

Crotch Fat @crotchfat.bsky.social · 2d

one please

Crotch Fat @crotchfat.bsky.social · 5d

I don't know you guys, I think Bari Weiss is killin' it.

CBS News headline "Baltimore couple arrives in Chicago for marathon to find hotel canceled reservation"

Crotch Fat @crotchfat.bsky.social · 6d

40% of the accounts I follow talk about normal sports

40% of the accounts I follow talk about how strange it sounds when other people talk about any sports

20% of the accounts I follow talk about weird sports that I don't know anything about, like some kind of a big rugby tournament

Crotch Fat @crotchfat.bsky.social · 7d

Happy little sunbib lady

Crotch Fat @crotchfat.bsky.social · 7d

Glad you saw a little yellow dickie gal

1 1

Crotch Fat @crotchfat.bsky.social · 8d

Ah yes, the notoriously relatively sane positions of (put on reading glasses) Marjorie Taylor Greene

2 15

Crotch Fat @crotchfat.bsky.social · 9d

"We called bullshit on stuff and people thought that was interesting!"

Crotch Fat @crotchfat.bsky.social · 13d

I live on a block that gets a lot of cruise traffic between a "look at me" commercial strip and the highway, so I'm used to hearing all manner of bangers being blasted out of slow moving vehicles. What I did not expect this morning was Sara McLaughlin.

Crotch Fat @crotchfat.bsky.social · 14d

Wait a minute. If you were a severed employee, you could just keep going out the stairwell for 8 hours a day until they fired your outie.

Crotch Fat @crotchfat.bsky.social · 14d

America's military MUST lead the world in discipline, and that is why they are ALL doing No Nut November

Crotch Fat @crotchfat.bsky.social · 19d

If you think calling them "diarrhea color rush" as a joke means I don't like the uniforms, you are quite wrong! I have the profoundest respect for diarrhea sufferers across the world, and proudly count myself among their number! OUT OF THE TOILET AND INTO THE STREETS!!!

Crotch Fat @crotchfat.bsky.social · 19d

"Tonight, we will debut the diarrhea color rush uniforms" - The Arizona Cardinals