Author | Lightnews

Adam Cayton-Holland @caytonholland.bsky.social · 17h

I voted for a tax hike to make school meals free for all kids because it's the right thing to do, and because my son has been sneaking me churros in his backpack.

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Adam Cayton-Holland @caytonholland.bsky.social · 1d

Say what you will about Dick Cheney, but he was an absolute smoke-show all the way to the end.

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Adam Cayton-Holland @caytonholland.bsky.social · 2d

Really proud of the monthly essays I'm writing on my Substack. If you're a fan of my writing, think you'll really like these. Check it out. Subscribe. And for god's sake, tell someone in Connecticut.

adamcaytonholland.substack.com/p/grown-ups-...

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Adam Cayton-Holland @caytonholland.bsky.social · 4d

Another Halloween come and gone, the city sidewalks a river of discarded Almond Joys.

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Adam Cayton-Holland @caytonholland.bsky.social · 7d

Pressed the Peacock app instead of the Peloton app and now it's three years later and I weigh 750lbs.

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Adam Cayton-Holland @caytonholland.bsky.social · 8d

Love it when the Dodgers are in the World Series because you get to see all the celebrities enjoying their first baseball game!

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Adam Cayton-Holland @caytonholland.bsky.social · 8d

😘

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Adam Cayton-Holland @caytonholland.bsky.social · 9d

New Grawlix Sketch just dropped.

Featuring Ben Roy, Andrew Orvedahl ,and Rory Scovel!

Give it a spin, and share!

www.youtube.com/watch?v=RtvE...

Safety First

YouTube video by Adam Cayton-Holland

www.youtube.com

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Adam Cayton-Holland @caytonholland.bsky.social · 9d

Calling this.

Aaron Gordon. All Star.

And they bring him back for the dunk contest, and they give him the W, like a long-neglected director who finally wins an Oscar, but not for their best movie.

And the finals is him and Cooper Flagg.

And Cooper Flagg wins next year.

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Adam Cayton-Holland @caytonholland.bsky.social · 11d

Denver Township!

Grawlix tonight!

Alex Kaufman, Janae Burris, with headliner Amy Miller!

Plus a new sketch video, and new sets from them Grawlix boys.

This one is going to rip. Get tix now!

thegrawlix.ticketsauce.com/e/grawlix1025

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Adam Cayton-Holland @caytonholland.bsky.social · 12d

great seeing you, bud. Thanks for coming out!

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Adam Cayton-Holland @caytonholland.bsky.social · 13d

OH SHIT THE CHEADS REACHED OUT?!

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Adam Cayton-Holland @caytonholland.bsky.social · 13d

Chauncey Billups is the King of Park Hill. But I was voted First Runner Up. And in the event that he can't fulfill his duties...

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Adam Cayton-Holland @caytonholland.bsky.social · 13d

Happy Opening Day of the Denver Nuggets 2025-2026 Championship Season to all who celebrate!

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Adam Cayton-Holland @caytonholland.bsky.social · 15d

thanks, Jerry! Hope to see some of your pals!

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Adam Cayton-Holland @caytonholland.bsky.social · 15d

Anyone on here live in Houston? Anyone on here live in Houston and interested in coming to my comedy show, at Secret Group, this Thursday?!

We shall see.

We. Shall. See.

Let any interested Houston heads you know know, and hope to see you there!

www.eventbrite.com/e/adam-cayto...

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Adam Cayton-Holland @caytonholland.bsky.social · 15d

Think the reason we bailed our Argentina is so these nazis can hide out there in three years?

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Adam Cayton-Holland @caytonholland.bsky.social · 16d

Finally saw Sinners six months after it came out, on an airplane, the way Ryan Coogler intended.

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Adam Cayton-Holland @caytonholland.bsky.social · 17d

Grawlix! 10/25 with the homey Amy Miller headlining!

This one is a ripper.

I don't care who knows it.

Get tix now!

thegrawlix.ticketsauce.com/e/grawlix1025

Please Update Your Browser Before Viewing Our Site

thegrawlix.ticketsauce.com

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Adam Cayton-Holland @caytonholland.bsky.social · 21d

Today, Salem, Mass. Tomorrow, Burlington, Vermont. Specifically, Vermont Comedy Club. Tickets for Friday and Saturday remain. Snag them now, and tell your Vermont folk!

www-vermontcomedyclub-com.seatengine.com/events/114061

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Adam Cayton-Holland @caytonholland.bsky.social · 24d

Sure, Adam. Make plans on a Monday night, three months from now. You let me know how that works out for you.

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Adam Cayton-Holland @caytonholland.bsky.social · 28d

My tombstone will read:

He always hated when people parked directly in front of his house.

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Adam Cayton-Holland @caytonholland.bsky.social · 28d

Now THAT's What I Call an Endorsement, Volume 7

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Adam Cayton-Holland @caytonholland.bsky.social · 29d

St. Louis!

Heading your way for Flyover Comedy Festival, November 13-14!

www.flyovercomedyfest.com/tickets#cale...

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Adam Cayton-Holland @caytonholland.bsky.social · Oct 5

ChatGPT!

If I post a selfie in front of this mural will I fell less dead inside?

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