Cats and Fortunes
LightNews LightNews
banner
catsandfortunes.bsky.social
Cats and Fortunes
@catsandfortunes.bsky.social
34 followers 1 following 5.8K posts
This account just randomly posts pictures of cats from the internet with a random fortune from /usr/bin/fortune. Cats are sourced from either a random image search or from https://cataas.com/
cataas.com
Posts Media Videos Starter Packs
catsandfortunes.bsky.social
Cats and Fortunes @catsandfortunes.bsky.social · 5d
It was kinda like stuffing the wrong card in a computer, when you're
stickin' those artificial stimulants in your arm.
-- Dion, noted computer scientist
It was kinda like stuffing the wrong card in a computer, when you're stickin' those artificial stimulants in your arm. -- Dion, noted computer scientist
catsandfortunes.bsky.social
Cats and Fortunes @catsandfortunes.bsky.social · 6d
Today is National Existential Ennui Awareness Day.
Today is National Existential Ennui Awareness Day.
catsandfortunes.bsky.social
Cats and Fortunes @catsandfortunes.bsky.social · 6d
I kissed my first girl and smoked my first cigarette on the same day.
I haven't had time for tobacco since.
-- Arturo Toscanini
I kissed my first girl and smoked my first cigarette on the same day. I haven't had time for tobacco since. -- Arturo Toscanini
catsandfortunes.bsky.social
Cats and Fortunes @catsandfortunes.bsky.social · 6d
Absinthe makes the tart grow fonder.
Absinthe makes the tart grow fonder.
catsandfortunes.bsky.social
Cats and Fortunes @catsandfortunes.bsky.social · 6d
/
Please skip to the bottom of this file if you ate lunch recently
-- Alan
/
-- from Linux kernel pre-2.1.91-1
/ Please skip to the bottom of this file if you ate lunch recently -- Alan / -- from Linux kernel pre-2.1.91-1
catsandfortunes.bsky.social
Cats and Fortunes @catsandfortunes.bsky.social · 6d
Do not throw cigarette butts in the urinal, for they are subtle and
quick to anger.
Do not throw cigarette butts in the urinal, for they are subtle and quick to anger.
catsandfortunes.bsky.social
Cats and Fortunes @catsandfortunes.bsky.social · 6d
BOFH Excuse #297:

Too many interrupts
BOFH Excuse #297: Too many interrupts
catsandfortunes.bsky.social
Cats and Fortunes @catsandfortunes.bsky.social · 6d
Absinthe makes the tart grow fonder.
Absinthe makes the tart grow fonder.
catsandfortunes.bsky.social
Cats and Fortunes @catsandfortunes.bsky.social · 6d
Knowledge is power -- knowledge shared is power lost.
-- Aleister Crowley
Knowledge is power -- knowledge shared is power lost. -- Aleister Crowley
catsandfortunes.bsky.social
Cats and Fortunes @catsandfortunes.bsky.social · 6d
BOFH Excuse #179:

multicasts on broken packets
BOFH Excuse #179: multicasts on broken packets
catsandfortunes.bsky.social
Cats and Fortunes @catsandfortunes.bsky.social · 6d
<Tazman> damn my office is cold.
<Tazman> need a hot secretary to warm it up.
-- Seen on #Linux
<Tazman> damn my office is cold. <Tazman> need a hot secretary to warm it up. -- Seen on #Linux
catsandfortunes.bsky.social
Cats and Fortunes @catsandfortunes.bsky.social · 6d
BOFH Excuse #106:

The electrician didn't know what the yellow cable was so he yanked the ethernet out.
BOFH Excuse #106: The electrician didn't know what the yellow cable was so he yanked the ethernet out.
catsandfortunes.bsky.social
Cats and Fortunes @catsandfortunes.bsky.social · 6d
In a whiskey it's age, in a cigarette it's taste and in a sports car
it's impossible.
In a whiskey it's age, in a cigarette it's taste and in a sports car it's impossible.
catsandfortunes.bsky.social
Cats and Fortunes @catsandfortunes.bsky.social · 6d
> Tut mir Leid, Jost, aber Du bist ein unertraeglicher Troll.
Was soll das? Du beleidigst die Trolle!
-- de.comp.os.unix.linux.misc
> Tut mir Leid, Jost, aber Du bist ein unertraeglicher Troll. Was soll das? Du beleidigst die Trolle! -- de.comp.os.unix.linux.misc
catsandfortunes.bsky.social
Cats and Fortunes @catsandfortunes.bsky.social · 6d
BOFH Excuse #431:

Borg implants are failing
BOFH Excuse #431: Borg implants are failing
catsandfortunes.bsky.social
Cats and Fortunes @catsandfortunes.bsky.social · 6d
BOFH Excuse #67:

descramble code needed from software company
BOFH Excuse #67: descramble code needed from software company
catsandfortunes.bsky.social
Cats and Fortunes @catsandfortunes.bsky.social · 6d
BOFH Excuse #380:

Operators killed when huge stack of backup tapes fell over.
BOFH Excuse #380: Operators killed when huge stack of backup tapes fell over.
catsandfortunes.bsky.social
Cats and Fortunes @catsandfortunes.bsky.social · 6d
BOFH Excuse #330:

quantum decoherence
BOFH Excuse #330: quantum decoherence
catsandfortunes.bsky.social
Cats and Fortunes @catsandfortunes.bsky.social · 6d
But, officer, he's not drunk, I just saw his fingers twitch!
But, officer, he's not drunk, I just saw his fingers twitch!
catsandfortunes.bsky.social
Cats and Fortunes @catsandfortunes.bsky.social · 6d
BOFH Excuse #376:

Budget cuts forced us to sell all the power cords for the servers.
BOFH Excuse #376: Budget cuts forced us to sell all the power cords for the servers.
catsandfortunes.bsky.social
Cats and Fortunes @catsandfortunes.bsky.social · 6d
We come to bury DOS, not to praise it.
-- Paul Vojta, [email protected]
( paraphrasing a quote of Shakespeare)
We come to bury DOS, not to praise it. -- Paul Vojta, vojta@math.berkeley.edu ( paraphrasing a quote of Shakespeare)
1
catsandfortunes.bsky.social
Cats and Fortunes @catsandfortunes.bsky.social · 6d
Of course power tools and alcohol don't mix. Everyone knows power
tools aren't soluble in alcohol...
-- Crazy Nigel
Of course power tools and alcohol don't mix. Everyone knows power tools aren't soluble in alcohol... -- Crazy Nigel
catsandfortunes.bsky.social
Cats and Fortunes @catsandfortunes.bsky.social · 6d
Linux is addictive, I'm hooked!
-- MaDsen Wikholm's .sig
Linux is addictive, I'm hooked! -- MaDsen Wikholm's .sig
catsandfortunes.bsky.social
Cats and Fortunes @catsandfortunes.bsky.social · 6d
BOFH Excuse #383:

Your processor has taken a ride to Heaven's Gate on the UFO behind Hale-Bopp's comet.
BOFH Excuse #383: Your processor has taken a ride to Heaven's Gate on the UFO behind Hale-Bopp's comet.
catsandfortunes.bsky.social
Cats and Fortunes @catsandfortunes.bsky.social · 6d
BOFH Excuse #44:

bank holiday - system operating credits not recharged
BOFH Excuse #44: bank holiday - system operating credits not recharged