Author | Lightnews

American Youth Party @blueshallows.bsky.social · 14h

Democracy’s not dead- it just cc’d everyone.

#AYP #AmericanYouthParty #NewsomToTrump #BlueWave2025 #PoliticalSatire #DemocracyWins #BrettShallowford #ShadyShane88 #LadyDeVilleCashwell

Read more here: open.substack.com/pub/brettsha...

🏛️💥 DEAR DONALD: AMERICA’S BREAKUP LETTER 💔📬

😂💌 Newsom: Thanks For The Blue Wave, Big Guy!!! 🌊🦅

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American Youth Party @blueshallows.bsky.social · 14h

Highlights include:
– A “strategic beef alliance” with Argentina 🥩
– Putin’s new Mar-a-Lago spa guest pass 🪖
– SHADYSHANE88’s bet that “fraud” hits before minute 3 of Trump’s speech 🎲
– Lady DeVille Cashwell’s new lawsuit: “Emotional Taxation Without Representation” 💄⚖️

🏛️💥 DEAR DONALD: AMERICA’S BREAKUP LETTER 💔📬

😂💌 Newsom: Thanks For The Blue Wave, Big Guy!!! 🌊🦅

open.substack.com

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American Youth Party @blueshallows.bsky.social · 14h

🇺🇸🔥 “America Called, Donald — She Wants Her Dignity Back.”

Governor Gavin Newsom just accidentally sent the funniest email in U.S. history: roasting Trump’s “America First” brand while listing every foreign dictator he’s flirted with this week.

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American Youth Party @blueshallows.bsky.social · 1d

Read more here: open.substack.com/pub/brettsha...

🇺🇸❄️ THE MILLER’S NEW ADDRESS: CLASSIFIED 🏰🤡

📬 Stephen Discovers A Gated Community That Can’t Insult Him 🪖

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American Youth Party @blueshallows.bsky.social · 1d

🇺🇸❄️ THE MILLER’S NEW ADDRESS: CLASSIFIED 🏰🤡
Stephen discovers a gated community that won’t insult him — where he lives on “Base Freedom-1,” guards salute him, guard dogs wear sunglasses, and chalking addresses is a national security threat. #AYP #AmericanYouthParty #MAGAParody

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American Youth Party @blueshallows.bsky.social · 2d

Let them eat Trump steak!

American Youth Party @blueshallows.bsky.social · 2d

As he fires subordinates for “disloyalty,” Lady DeVille Cashwell calls it “bold.”
Dr. Sherry calls it “a ceiling fan in a meth lab.”
Scott Galloway just sighed.

#AYP #AmericanYouthParty #JetFuelForLove #MAGAComedy #SatiricalState #BrettShallowford #DrSherryKnows #SemperSnark

🇺🇸🎤 “JET FUEL FOR LOVE”: KASH’S DEFINITION OF “OFFICIAL BUSINESS” ✈️💋

🦅✈️ FBI Director Patel’s $60M Date Night for Democracy 🛩️💥

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American Youth Party @blueshallows.bsky.social · 2d

🇺🇸🎤 “JET FUEL FOR LOVE”: Kash Patel’s $60M Date Night for Democracy ✈️💋
FBI Director Kash Patel used a taxpayer jet to watch his girlfriend sing at Real American Freestyle Wrestling. Calls it “official business.”

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American Youth Party @blueshallows.bsky.social · 3d

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American Youth Party @blueshallows.bsky.social · 3d

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American Youth Party @blueshallows.bsky.social · 3d

Read more here: open.substack.com/pub/brettsha...

🇺🇸🍽️ THE GREAT GATSBY FEEDING PROGRAM 💰🎩

🍞 “Let Them Eat Sirloin” at the Marie Antoinette Pavilion 💎

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American Youth Party @blueshallows.bsky.social · 3d

🇺🇸🍞 The Great Gatsby Government is back!
Trump builds a golden ballroom while a judge forces him to fund SNAP again. “Let them eat sirloin,” he says, tearing down the East Wing for the Marie Antoinette Pavilion.

#BreadlineBall #AYP #AmericanYouthParty #Satire #LetThemEatSirloin

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American Youth Party @blueshallows.bsky.social · 4d

The ceremony was touching- JD knelt like a man proposing to fossil fuel subsidies while Erika delivered last rites to irony itself.

#AmericanYouthParty #SemperSnark #ResurrectionTour2025 ⚰️💸

American Youth Party @blueshallows.bsky.social · 4d

🇺🇸⚰️ THE MAGA BAPTISM OF EGO & INFLUENCE 💋💀

JD & Erika just held a “Resurrection Rally” to honor the dearly departed influence of a right-wing youth movement that accidentally became a pyramid scheme.

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American Youth Party @blueshallows.bsky.social · 5d

Corporate HR: “This violates policy.”
Christian Nationalists: “This fulfills prophecy.” 🕊️💄

Lady DeVille Cashwell says, “If sin had a stage manager, he’d book the same lighting designer…. Besides, every resurrection starts with a scandal.” 👑

🙏💋 #MakeAffairsFaithBasedAgain

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American Youth Party @blueshallows.bsky.social · 5d

The CEO & HR lady got caught at a Coldplay concert. JD & Erika did it under a spotlight with White Jesus as stage manager.

Difference? The CEO got fired. JD got a standing ovation & a new prayer line. 🙌🇺🇸 One lost stock options. The other gained a Fox News segment & a merch line. 🎤🔥

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American Youth Party @blueshallows.bsky.social · 5d

#AYP #AmericanYouthParty #KristiNoem #TearsForFreedom #PoliticalSatire #PepperMistUSA

Read more here: open.substack.com/pub/brettsha...

🇺🇸🎃 DHS: HALLOWEEN IS A COUNTERTERRORISM RAVE 🎃💀

🧯Pritzker Asked For A Pause. Noem Offers Trick-Or-Treat’s With Pepper Mist 💋

open.substack.com

American Youth Party @blueshallows.bsky.social · 5d

🇺🇸🎃 OPERATION PUMPKIN SPICE DEPORTATION 🎃💀
Kristi Noem says DHS won’t “pause” ICE raids for Halloween- instead, she’s “seasoning the air for civics.”
Pritzker asked for candy; Noem brought pepper spray.
Freedom’s cologne hits harder this year. 💨

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American Youth Party @blueshallows.bsky.social · 5d

All miracles must now be pre-approved by Pontius Pilate’s Office of Economic Development. Unauthorized resurrections will be prosecuted!!!!

#MakeNazarethGreatAgain

American Youth Party @blueshallows.bsky.social · 5d

⚖️ LAW & ORDER: ROMAN EDITION 🔨
✝️ If Your Theology Major Was Fox News 📺

FROM: Trump 33 A.D. Re-Election Committee 🏛️

Our Savior broke the law by feeding the poor without a license. SAD!!! If only He’d applied for a business permit & pledged allegiance to Caesar. 🙏💰

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American Youth Party @blueshallows.bsky.social · 6d

You can almost hear Charlie whisper, ‘Honey, not in front of the donors.’ This is what happens when grief, Fox News lighting, & dry shampoo form a trinity.

Somewhere, Mike Pence just burst into flames & doesn’t know why.

American Youth Party @blueshallows.bsky.social · 6d

So yes- believe him. Because if a man tells you he’s going to burn the house down, don’t hand him the matches.

#AYP #SemperSnark #BelieveHim #LadyDeVilleCashwell #DrSherry #SHADYSHANE88

American Youth Party @blueshallows.bsky.social · 6d

“Accountability is for the poor,” she whispered while serving champagne subpoenas in a red hat that read ‘Faith, Family & Felonies.’

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American Youth Party @blueshallows.bsky.social · 6d

AYP reporter Brett Shallowford’s MAGA Ex- Lady DeVille Cashwell, naturally, took it as a lifestyle guide- she now prosecutes her enemies via Instagram captions, restraining orders & abandoned her last three lawyers like Trump abandoned NATO for an attorney with smaller hands, like her dad.

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American Youth Party @blueshallows.bsky.social · 6d

Meanwhile, Dr. Sherry framed the NYT cover in her classroom as a visual aid titled “How Fascism Announces Itself in Helvetica.”

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