Author | Lightnews

adam beilman @beils.bsky.social · 1d

New York’s Football Team

Zohran Kwame Mamdani @zohrankmamdani.bsky.social · 1d

We didn’t smash any tables. We didn’t eat a garbage plate. But you better believe the Bills got that W today.

Thanks to Gov. Kathy Hochul for bringing the #BillsMafia energy to Astoria today—and to Murphy’s Bar for having us.

Zohran, Gov. Hochul, Jumaane Williams and a fan take a selfie outside the bar.

Zohran, Gov. Hochul and Mark Levine at a table in the bar, watching the game.

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adam beilman @beils.bsky.social · 1d

It should be no surprise that the Bills’
Bishop finally showed up this week

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adam beilman @beils.bsky.social · 28d

Fellas,,,

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adam beilman @beils.bsky.social · Oct 2

Romo
Olsen
Aikman
Collinsworth
Getting hit by a bus
Brady

Romo is goofy but I just think he has the best understanding of the (modern) game and translates for the viewer the best. Inserted Olsen because same reason.

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adam beilman @beils.bsky.social · Sep 22

Berlin Marathon 2025
3:38:57

- Temps peaked at 80F, the wurst conditions I’ve ever raced in.
- Got beat handily by Harry Styles.
- Saw 4 different spectators in Josh Allen jerseys.

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adam beilman @beils.bsky.social · Sep 22

Houston (and I guess Nashville) keeps the AFC South out of the basement.

Whereas Pittsburgh and Baltimore do not make up for the sins of Cincinnati

adam beilman @beils.bsky.social · Sep 19

Anyone know German that can help me translate?

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adam beilman @beils.bsky.social · Sep 19

Woke up at 2:15a to watch the Bills on a laptop via VPN in Berlin. Did not disappoint.

Scheiß auf die Delfine forever

@nagelhout.bsky.social @prescottrossi.bsky.social

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adam beilman @beils.bsky.social · Jul 30

Sounds like it’s time to get you to God’s country (Brooklyn)

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adam beilman @beils.bsky.social · Jul 2

No snacks, just 3 Red Bulls.

Then you drive to the nearest coast in order to drain the oceans to find and kill god

Chase Daniel @chasedaniel.bsky.social · Jul 2

Diet Coke, Cheetos Flaming Hot, & Peanut M&M’s is the only answer

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adam beilman @beils.bsky.social · Jun 3

Whenever my inbox is clear, Gmail has insisted that I have (1) unread email. It has been this way for at least the past 4 years and there’s no way for me find it because you can’t search just the primary inbox

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adam beilman @beils.bsky.social · May 21

Is there any connection between USA Football and the NFL, or is the governing body all “flag football guys”?

adam beilman @beils.bsky.social · May 10

Clean mold from your window air conditioner with these simple steps!

A window AC unit on a table outdoors with tools and cleaning supplies

A window AC unit that has been taken apart and is now in pieces

The pieces of a window AC unit in garbage bags

An e-commerce product page showing a new window AC unit

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adam beilman @beils.bsky.social · Apr 28

Saints UDFA class is just the entire roster from the Key & Peele sketch

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adam beilman @beils.bsky.social · Mar 14

Unusual for whom?

adam beilman @beils.bsky.social · Mar 8

One of my neighbors screamed at Wallace and me once saying, “what if I came over and peed on your house?!” to which the only response I had was, “…ok?”

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adam beilman @beils.bsky.social · Feb 21

Here’s hoping “See you in court” becomes the 2025 version of “I’m reclaiming my time”

Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com · Feb 21

TRUMP: The NCAA has complied immediately. That's good. But I understand Maine -- is the governor of Maine here?

JANET MILLS: Yeah I'm here

TRUMP: Are you not gonna comply?

JM: I'm going to comply with state and federal law

T: You better do it bc you're not gonna get any federal funding at all

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adam beilman @beils.bsky.social · Feb 14

Happy Valentine’s Day

A Buffalo Bills valentine with a picture of Nathan Peterman and the caption “I would pick you five times”

adam beilman @beils.bsky.social · Feb 7

I wouldn’t have thought this was possible in 2021

rachgrub.bsky.social @rachgrub.bsky.social · Feb 7

Imagine knowing this would happen in like, 2013. Like what would you even begin to think.

Taylor Nigrelli @taylornigrelli.bsky.social · Feb 7

The NFL MVP is a Buffalo Bill

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adam beilman @beils.bsky.social · Feb 7

Absolutely zero drip. Critically low levels of swag

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adam beilman @beils.bsky.social · Feb 6

It’s the John Mulaney “Horse in a Hospital” bit on a slightly smaller scale

adam beilman @beils.bsky.social · Jan 23

I work in advertising and once had a client who was obsessed with the Dawn ducks. To the point where he would remark, in reaction to ideas we presented that underwhelmed him, “well it’s no Dawn ducks.”

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adam beilman @beils.bsky.social · Jan 23

I went to the Chiefs page on the other app to see their injury report, and the 3rd tweet down in their feed was an ad for some incoherent crypto + anti-Fauci thing?

I did seriously pause for a second and think whether their admin might have RT’d on the work account by mistake

Reposted by adam beilman

Alex @alexnotander.bsky.social · Jan 20

Bringing Glory to the Lakes for the next 30 years. @beils.bsky.social

Fuck you. Go Bills.

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