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Barry D. Bones

@barrydbones.bsky.social

230 followers 470 following 700 posts

Former undead servant for a necromancer, now just wants to run a shop in peace... Join me for fun games, dumb jokes, and a lot of numbskulled content! Banner by @SheGhoullVT.bsky.social Links: https://barry-d-bones.carrd.co

barry-d-bones.carrd.co

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Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 1d

Will you hold my hand in the Haunted Houses? I get scared easily...
📅 MON: Resident Evil @ 8pm EST
📅 TUE: Devil May Cry @ 8pm EST
📅 WED: Hollow Knight @ 8pm EST
📅 THU: DOOM Eternal @ 8pm EST
📅 FRI: Little Nightmares 2 @ 8pm EST

Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 10m

Remember:

Lemons are a human-made fruit. So life did not give you lemons.

Your bitch-ass neighbor did, so you're well within your rights to crossbreed the lemon tree with a Box Tree and make lemon frag grenades.

Until we meet again!

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Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 13h

That's it, I'm stealing YOUR toe knuckles now (Feed 'em to Box as a TREAT) /J

Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 13h

Did anyone else's divination setup just completely fizzle out today, ooooor are the gremlins trying to steal my toe knuckles again?

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Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 18h

Let me know how this goes... For science...

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Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 18h

Better than no review at all. 😎

Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 19h

The DOC, I'll give it to... You, I'm giving a mug of hit chocolate, you don't need that pain.

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Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 20h

"GIVE ME YOUR STRONGEST POTION, MERCHANT"

My dear adventurer, I say this with the utmost respect...

You can't handle my strongest potion.

You're level 3, barely making 5 copper by killing rogue goblins, and look like you'd fall over if I flicked you in the 'nads!

Go level up!

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Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 1d

Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 5d

Remember the old "the golem knows where it is because it knows where it isn't" meme?

Well, I had an epiphany... The same goes for people...

You know where you are because you perceive the world around you through your five senses...

Which all tell you where you are NOT!

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Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 6d

Your foes will see you call forth a star from the heavens to smite their entire keep in a single strike...

And claim you are too frail to wield a blade.

Those who wish to tear you down will see only the faults they wish to see...

While you are powerful in your own unique way.

Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 7d

You ever go looking for something and find your first grimoires, only to read them and cringe at your younger self?

My Magus in the Arcane Arts, that's growth! You have come so very far.

Do not let the current shadows of the giants you face detract from the ogers you've slain.

Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 8d

Spook-tober time! Spooky Games all 'round!
📅 MON: Resident Evil @ 8pm EST
📅 TUE: Devil May Cry @ 8pm EST
📅 WED: Hollow Knight @ 8pm EST
📅 THU: DOOM Eternal @ 8pm EST
📅 FRI: Little Nightmares @ 8pm EST
📅 SUN: Community Movie Night! @ 8pm EST

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Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 10d

The real reason wizards wear robes with big bell sleeves is so we can hide firework tubes in there.

Thought I was out of spells? THINK AGAIN, KNAVE! I CAST FIREBALL!

And then you launch a mortar full of tannerite from your sleeves at them just to watch them panic...

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Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 13d

So, I think I can make a spell to invert someone's balls/ovaries...

Necromancy is the study of flesh magic.

Transmutation is the study of transformational magic.

There is a mathematical equation for "inverting" a sphere:
X' = M + ((r²/(||X-M||²))*(X-M)

In this essay, I will-

Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 14d

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Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 14d

I am once more plagued by questions on the nature of magic... 🧙‍♂️

💎Elemental gems💎 - A staple of RPGs, right? Fire gems, Frost gems, nd gems, etc...

But a GEM is inherently earth-based, so how do the gems become imbued?

Does magic get trapped in the crystalline structure? 🤔

Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 14d

Nah, you just get the spray bottle.

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Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 15d

Little blue potion? If the effects last more than 4hrs, I contact a Cleric, right?

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Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 15d

I gotta train my magicka reserves, I need access to 3rd-level spells...

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Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 15d

Y'know what? Fuck promo-posting! Y'all getting unhinged self-taught wizardposting now! 🧙‍♂️

I may not be strong enough to cast Fireball yet, but my shop is near a cave, so I can harvest all the necessary components! And when I do, ohhhhhh, I will be SUCH a menace...😈

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Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 17d

We're building up quite the community in our little Homestead, and I'm enjoying the sense of comradery we're building with each of our villagers!

We now join @oileeve for their first foray into Deadlock! Come cheer them on!

www.twitch.tv/oliveisonline

Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 17d

I think we deserve to spruce up the homestead a bit! Polish the silver, renovate the houses, upgrade the facilities... Join me for some Homemaking that SLAYS, live in the 🟣 & 🔴 Dimensions!
#ENVtuber #AssassinsCreed3

Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 19d

More exploration, and I managed to buy the lantern I've been wanting! WHEEEEE!

We now join @bunnywinterlily.bsky.social as she SMITEs her foes! Come lend your aid!

Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 19d

I have this big ol' mark on my map, but no idea what it means or where to go... Time to start exploring everything! Join the chaos in the 🟣 & 🔴 Dimensions!
#ENVtuber #hollowknight

Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 19d

I have this big ol' mark on my map, but no idea what it means or where to go... Time to start exploring everything! Join the chaos in the 🟣 & 🔴 Dimensions!
#ENVtuber #hollowknight

Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 20d

Well, I may not have defeated the DOOR, but we defeated quite a few Shadows...

We now join @venusdawnvt.bsky.social as she cuts down mighty foes in Hollow Knight! Come lend your Spirit!

Barry D. Bones @barrydbones.bsky.social · 20d

I am halted by the enemy of all gamers... The dreaded DOOR... Join me in defeating this horrifying foe live in the 🟣 & 🔴 Dimensions!
#ENVtuber #Persona3