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Audrey Farnsworth

@audipenny.bsky.social

15K followers 220 following 930 posts

Writer; voice of the baby T. rex from the lost world jurassic park | https://linktr.ee/audipenny | https://audipenny.substack.com

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Audrey Farnsworth @audipenny.bsky.social · Nov 21

as a dedication to my 4+ year thread of movie reviews on tw*tter that I did as self care™️, I’m going to do it again here. As rebellion

Review of the movie cabin in the woods where I’m saying it’s my friend

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Audrey Farnsworth @audipenny.bsky.social · 7h

I’ve never seen anything like this in my whole life

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Audrey Farnsworth @audipenny.bsky.social · 1d

The Aflac Duck was a bully to me in 7th grade. He gaslit me actually. And allllll of you love him. So where does that leave me, hm

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Audrey Farnsworth @audipenny.bsky.social · 1d

Everything you buy during the week before your birthday is just a present and should be a tax write off

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Audrey Farnsworth @audipenny.bsky.social · 2d

tRy OuR nEw AI fEaTuReS lmao no thank you! no thank you, you unbelievable fucking loser lmao. no thank you hahaha

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Audrey Farnsworth @audipenny.bsky.social · 3d

intrusive thought won’t go away of a rattlesnake wearing bells on its rattle and trying to trick me into thinking it’s Santa Claus

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Audrey Farnsworth @audipenny.bsky.social · 4d

I’m going to reply to every single email I ever receive with just this suggested reply

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Audrey Farnsworth @audipenny.bsky.social · 5d

Exactly

Audrey Farnsworth @audipenny.bsky.social · 5d

Right. No that’s true thank you

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Audrey Farnsworth @audipenny.bsky.social · 5d

hopefully we can collaborate…

Audrey Farnsworth @audipenny.bsky.social · 6d

Last night I had a dream I saw an ad for a film simply called “A Billy Zane Movie” and I was upset I didn’t think of it. But turns out I did so no one do this before me please. I’m going to do it. Don’t take my idea

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Audrey Farnsworth @audipenny.bsky.social · 6d

Oh wow this seems big, I wonder what email has to say about what’s going on with my email address

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Audrey Farnsworth @audipenny.bsky.social · 7d

Definitely it’s implied

Audrey Farnsworth @audipenny.bsky.social · 7d

Absolutely

Audrey Farnsworth @audipenny.bsky.social · 7d

Every several years an intrusive thought shows up at my brain’s doorstep with a briefcase containing materials for a 40 minute presentation on why it thinks I should’ve been a freelance detective and why it’s not too late

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Audrey Farnsworth @audipenny.bsky.social · 7d

Bullying my dad’s new microwave when it sings its little song when it’s done. Like oh look at you, aren’t you a sweet little sparrow, is that your tune? well it sucks

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Audrey Farnsworth @audipenny.bsky.social · 8d

this is incredible I can’t wait

Reposted by Audrey Farnsworth

Audrey Farnsworth @audipenny.bsky.social · 11d

Bro get online the peacemaker season 2 episode 7 Reddit mega thread is popping off and everyone’s being super fucking insightful

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Audrey Farnsworth @audipenny.bsky.social · 10d

Cop just drove by with a labubu attached to his motorcycle which made about as much sense to my brain as if he had done so with a motorcycle attached to his labubu

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Audrey Farnsworth @audipenny.bsky.social · 11d

🧜‍♂️

Audrey Farnsworth @audipenny.bsky.social · 11d

I’m in the weeds man, I even replied to something

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Audrey Farnsworth @audipenny.bsky.social · 11d

Bro get online the peacemaker season 2 episode 7 Reddit mega thread is popping off and everyone’s being super fucking insightful

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Audrey Farnsworth @audipenny.bsky.social · 12d

“shop fall treats”? well bitch i’d Fucking love to do that

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Audrey Farnsworth @audipenny.bsky.social · 12d

I could be wrong and I definitely am but I’m pretty sure that in my lifetime the government has shut down 750 times

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Audrey Farnsworth @audipenny.bsky.social · 13d

me settling in for a tuesday night’s slumber, as I adjust my sleeping bonnet: and what emails will I Fucking wake up to tomorrow, hm? what bullshit awaits me

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Audrey Farnsworth @audipenny.bsky.social · 13d

telling my dog that if she wants to be a general, she can’t have a beard

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