It makes sense you'd feel numb to it after such an extended time since there's nothing you can realistically do about any of the situation. At some point, many things can become 'just another thing that happens'. For what it's worth, I hate that this had to become something normal for you 🫂

#TavQOTD

When no one is looking, he can take off all his masks. But when he takes off all his masks, his past begins to haunt him, filling every spare space in his mind. It's... painful, exhausting. This is not the kind of pain he likes. Once again, he begins to regret not having lost his memories.

뽀뽀

Socializing would usually drain me, but talking to you, writing with you doesn’t and that’s so rare. It feels natural, refreshing, comfortable to me.
I appreciate you, Ma. Whatever dream we're in, I hope it's a long one 💜

But alas, such technology doesn’t exist and neither of us is Illithid. But, Ayumu and Xal are and can do all of that anytime in a much better way, and that makes me happy.

I want to say so much more, but even moreso I wish I could just rest my forehead on my keyboard and have it pull my thoughts directly out of my brain to send to you. Not as words or sentences or any language, but just raw, unfiltered thoughts and feelings.

She's not meant to be palatable, her story isn’t either, so I also didn’t dare to hope anyone would see anything deeper in my burning pile of madness. But instead we found each other and spawned even more bloody exquisite madness together.

I also never expected Ayumu, this creature my mind birthed because it didn’t know where else to put so many of my different feelings, to not only be liked but also understood by someone else. Because of how personal she is to me I didn’t even think I'd ever be posting as much about her anywhere.

Never has someone else's OC managed to touch deeply buried parts of my soul like your Xal has, in a way that feels both like a stab and an embrace simultaneously. My brain can’t and doesn’t want to decide which it is, because I enjoy this exact combination as it is and only ever wants more.

Your Xal, who totally captivated my interest not even primarily because of the likeness of him and Ayumu, or because he's Illithid, or because he's attached to the Emperor, but most importantly because of how you write him. As so unapologetically him.

As are you, Ma 😭🖤
I didn't think anything like what we've experienced and created together would ever be a reality for me. That someone like you exists here, who's on the same wavelength as me in many ways and just happens to also have a character pursuing the same dreams as my Ayumu.

#tavqotd

Ayumu, of course. Ayumu and her creator.
Actually, it's not even about Xal.

Imagine that you are writing some nonsense about your character for tavqotd.
Not for anyone else, but for yourself. It is your therapy. You are not expecting anyone to like your character.

Some days everything still feels like a dream to me, and if it is, I hope I don't wake up. My brain can't comprehend something so cool actually happening to me or to my Ayumu. And yet, it is reality. My Ayumu has found a home with Xal and the Emperor; and I found my greatest ally and co-author 💜🦑

#TavQOTD

My Ayumu meeting @inemperorsname.bsky.social's Xal in a dream earlier this year and all that was born from it (like Ma's renders of them ❤️🤍)
I didn't expect the remarkable natural synergy these two have together, nor our two universes becoming one. It was unexpected, but so very welcome.

Hi #PortfolioDay! Flowlithid here, a digital artist passionate about dramatic scenes, moody narratives & comic art styles; Focus on Illithid/monster-leaning characters & BG3 fanart.

Portfolio: cara.app/sunaiadarts/...

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I felt similarly, I have not watched anything in German in ages but Dark was one of the few shows where I did, and actually really liked it.
I usually have everything set to English. My brain functions in English first, German second by this point, even though I was born and still live in Germany xD

Dark was so, so good. I've watched it like twice, thrice? and am tempted to rewatch it again because it’s been awhile. Timetravel chaos and timeline fuckery at its finest 🖤

#TavQOTD

No, no mercy. Orin's betrayal caused Ayumu to lose most memories; it's why she still has to painstakingly recover fragments of her past bit by bit now that she can do so as an Illithid.
Besides, Orin was an obstacle between Ayumu's and the Emperor’s chance at freedom, so Ayumu killed her.

What followed was an angry, one-eyed, profusely bleeding Lae'zel chasing Volo through camp, but he escaped.

Ayumu found all of this very entertaining and couldn’t resist going "You should have let him try again on your other eye, maybe this brilliant idea would have worked that time. Who knows!"

#TavQOTD

Ayumu had no interest in getting rid of her tadpole or having this ridiculous man "pick her brain", but… Lae'zel did.
At that point, Lae'zel was beyond exasperated by Ayumu, especially by her refusal to book it to the crèche, so Volo. It went exactly as you'd think and Lae'zel was furious.

Thank you 🖤 I enjoy doing this kind of dark, haunting screenshot vibe the most. That, but also just anything 🦑 and/or astral space.

I always love bloody shots so when my dialogue choices locked me into that Durge ending, I was like: 📸🦑, at least Ayumu still slays in her worst timeline