Alexander Warn
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alexanderwarn.bsky.social
Alexander Warn
@alexanderwarn.bsky.social
97 followers 140 following 830 posts
Actor, filmmaker and animator. Professional grotesque. Lamentations and surreal musings upon ones football team may occur.
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Ooohhhh this winds me right up!!!

Yes we do need to return to the fundamentals. The basics need to be competent to stop this mess...

I'm referring to not putting big chunks of text in all capitals! Difficult to get through a small paragraph. They manage to do it on his name though. #pafc
"Once reviled by respectable film critics..."

We get these articles every decade or so. Some critic(s) decide it's 'worthy' again, cycle continues.

The film industry doesn't exist without horror. It's always pushed story, form and the very technology of film.

www.theguardian.com/film/ng-inte...
Shock therapy: why scary movies keep evolving – and making money
With Hollywood favouring franchise fare, horror films have become the last bastion of inventive film-making, producing a new generation of auteurs in the process
www.theguardian.com
I am proposing some new data to analyse:

xC - Expected Cock-up(s)
xSP - Expected Sideways Pass
xCI - Expected Cut In
xTF - Expected Triangle Failure
xTA - Existential Tactical Angst
xBTB - Expected Back to Basics.
xWGA - Expected 'We Go Again' #pafc
Reposted by Alexander Warn
The Caerphilly result is what we need to see everywhere at the next election: people coordinating to vote tactically for parties which seek a fairer, kinder, greener country.
Pushing out both those who have betrayed our trust AND those who seek to exploit that betrayal.
Tonight in the style of later Samuel Beckett...

Lights up on a pile of empty Carabao.

A faint scream.

Lights drop out leaving a solitary bulb flickering.

Carabao blows away.

A loud blood curdling scream.

Bulb explodes and the Terry and June theme plays. Backwards.

The End. #pafc
I have consulted the spirit of Lionel Blair to explain our approach. He doesn't have a clue. He did swear but I couldn't possibly repeat what he said. Well he mimed the dirty word. I can't unsee it 😳 #pafc
Seems the club mantra of 'Outsmarting' everyone has led to us only outsmarting ourselves.
There's a gap between center-halves you could drift a bus through.

The gap between defence and midfield a Sperm Whale could lay lengthways in.

Attack have more chance of extracting themselves from an Event Horizon then seeing a ball

Each member of the units is a complete and utter stranger. #pafc
Roll up for football's equivalent of two bald men fighting over a comb - The Devon Derby aka Dual Carriageway Dust-up aka A38 Altercation.

If I was picking the team tonight, I would go for...

Jack '32
Waiters '75
Smith '86
Sturrock '02

Ah? Doesn't work like that? Bugger... #pafc
Blessed are the early morning starts. Required soothing tunes to get me through and the lads of Napalm Death doth provide.
The Video Dead (1987)

Effects and make-up are the most competent thing about it and genuinely well done for the budget. It's not without a couple of decent ideas and set ups but the filmmakers don't see enough to build around them. Watch if you have low standards and/or a love of camp value.
The Video Dead (1987)

The acting is appalling. Not ironically either, it is fucking dreadful and a lot of them look like they've never acted in their lives. If they were chosen after auditions the other candidates must have been literal planks of wood with faces drawn on them in felt tip.
The Video Dead (1987)

Fascinating. It's like it's written by someone who has never written before and only used clichés in a single, solitary draft. Also feels like an Italian film with lots lost in translation except this originated in English. I think, it thinks it's a comedy... #horror #1980s
"I don't feel like either team have opened us up, I don't think either team has done enough to score a combined three goals against, but we find ourselves losing..."

But they did do enough, by just letting us have the ball they know a mistake is likely. #pafc

www.bbc.com/sport/footba...
Tom Cleverley: Plymouth Argyle boss frustrated by AFC Wimbledon loss
Plymouth Argyle boss Tom Cleverley says his side have to be more defensively solid after their 2-1 loss at home to AFC Wimbledon.
www.bbc.com
I didn't know about your hybrid footballer and silent classic horror monster series?

It's Yorkferatu!
That is beautiful! The slap of the second fall and ending up half mast.
This is a very impressive result! Top stuff! #pafc
We deserved what we got. Nothing.

Currently whatever Cleverley is selling, I'm having difficulty buying. #pafc
Why he thought working for that crackpot was a good idea, is beyond me.
Wish our big units would actually play like big units. We may be the hosts but it's of a game not a dinner party.

Might as well break out the tea and horrible little white bread triangular sandwiches. #pafc
Disjointed. Like someone has had their knees pulled apart just enough to stay upright but find coordination awkward. #pafc
I've heard you're a man of enormous principles. I assume those Donnay socks come in vast packets with a "Mike Ashley is Apex" sticker?
Reposted by Alexander Warn
A comment last night reminded me why I can find theatres odious.

Guy in the audience stands up, a voice from behind me "Wearing an Argyle shirt to the theatre?" Yes, he can and did.

Sadly a certain attitude seems to linger. "Making an effort." He made the only effort required - getting a ticket.