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Andrey Bratus

@abratus.bsky.social

1.3K followers 870 following 1.1K posts

Funny memes, puns and dad jokes. Hilarious Jokes 👌 https://weird-jokes.com Python Knowledge base 👉 https://python-code.pro

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Andrey Bratus @abratus.bsky.social · Jun 17

My Uncle named his dogs Rolex And Timex.
They are his watch dogs.
#meme #joke #pun #dadjoke #irony #sarcasm
👍 Weird Jokes weird-jokes.com

My Uncle named his dogs Rolex And Timex.
They are his watch dogs.

Andrey Bratus @abratus.bsky.social · 3h

#memes
Where do rainbows go when they're bad?
Prism.
It's a light sentence.
weird-jokes.com/pun-memes-fa...

Where do rainbows go when they're bad?
Prism.
It's a light sentence.

Andrey Bratus @abratus.bsky.social · 4h

My ex husband just texted me, "Wish you were here"

He does this everytime he passes by a cemetery.

Andrey Bratus @abratus.bsky.social · 15h

#memes
Did you know that if you sneeze and fart at the same time...
Your body takes a screenshot.
weird-jokes.com/pun-memes-fa...

Did you know that if you sneeze and fart at the same time...
Your body takes a screenshot.

Andrey Bratus @abratus.bsky.social · 16h

#memes
What do you call an attractive monster?
Pretty scary.
weird-jokes.com/pun-memes-fa...

What do you call an attractive monster?
Pretty scary

Andrey Bratus @abratus.bsky.social · 19h

#memes
Why did the candle quit his job?
He was burned out.
weird-jokes.com/pun-memes-fa...

Why did the candle quit his job?
He was burned out.

Andrey Bratus @abratus.bsky.social · 1d

#memes
Did you hear about the blind carpenter?
He picked up his hammer and saw.
weird-jokes.com/pun-memes-fa...

Did you hear about the blind carpenter?
He picked up his hammer and saw.

Andrey Bratus @abratus.bsky.social · 1d

I asked my wife how to turn Alexa off.

She said: How about walking through the room naked?

Andrey Bratus @abratus.bsky.social · 1d

#memes
I used to work in a Russian napkin factory. I was a member of the serviette union.
weird-jokes.com/pun-memes-fa...

I used to work in a Russian napkin factory. I was a member of the serviette union.

Andrey Bratus @abratus.bsky.social · 1d

#memes
I've always wondered if songbirds get mad at hummingbirds for not knowing the words.
weird-jokes.com/pun-memes-fa...

I've always wondered if songbirds get mad at hummingbirds for not knowing the words.

Andrey Bratus @abratus.bsky.social · 1d

Extrovert: You should get out of your comfort zone.

Introvert: You should get out of my comfort zone.

Weird jokes weird-jokes.com

Weird Jokes - Bizarre, Funny, and Totally Oddball Humor.

Welcome to Weird Jokes, where laughter never ends. We've got a wide variety of weirdest jokes, memes and puns, come on in and join the fun!

weird-jokes.com

Andrey Bratus @abratus.bsky.social · 2d

If you’re trying to book a room but the hotel says they’re full, try booking again under the name “Improvement”

Because there’s always room for improvement.

Andrey Bratus @abratus.bsky.social · 2d

#funny
What do I like most about Worcestershire sauce?
It's hard to say.
weird-jokes.com/best-puns

Andrey Bratus @abratus.bsky.social · 2d

#funny
Just tried a frog-flavored beer.
You can really taste the hops.
weird-jokes.com/best-puns

Andrey Bratus @abratus.bsky.social · 2d

#humor
Where do boats go when they're sick?
To the doc.
weird-jokes.com/best-puns

Where do boats go when they're sick?
To the doc.

Andrey Bratus @abratus.bsky.social · 2d

In 1993, 4 Non Blondes asked us a question we still can't answer in 2025.

Weird jokes weird-jokes.com

Weird Jokes - Bizarre, Funny, and Totally Oddball Humor.

Welcome to Weird Jokes, where laughter never ends. We've got a wide variety of weirdest jokes, memes and puns, come on in and join the fun!

weird-jokes.com

Andrey Bratus @abratus.bsky.social · 3d

What's the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is very heavy, the other is a little lighter.

Andrey Bratus @abratus.bsky.social · 3d

#jokes
Why does Waldo wear stripes?
Because he doesn’t want to be spotted.
weird-jokes.com/best-puns

Andrey Bratus @abratus.bsky.social · 3d

#sarcasm
How many doctors does it take to change a light bulb?
It depends on the light bulb's insurance.
weird-jokes.com/best-sarcast...

How many doctors does it take to change a light bulb?
It depends on the light bulb's insurance.

Andrey Bratus @abratus.bsky.social · 3d

#puns
Why did the boy bring a ladder on the bus?
He wanted to go to high school.
weird-jokes.com/best-puns

Why did the boy bring a ladder on the bus?
He wanted to go to high school.

Andrey Bratus @abratus.bsky.social · 3d

Welcome to adulthood.

You get mad when they rearrange the grocery store now.

Weird jokes weird-jokes.com

Weird Jokes - Bizarre, Funny, and Totally Oddball Humor.

Welcome to Weird Jokes, where laughter never ends. We've got a wide variety of weirdest jokes, memes and puns, come on in and join the fun!

weird-jokes.com

Andrey Bratus @abratus.bsky.social · 4d

Manager: Wow, you’re dressed smart today.

Me: Thanks, I have a job interview on my lunch break.

Andrey Bratus @abratus.bsky.social · 4d

#dadjokes
It’s hard to choose which body part is my favorite.
But I pick my nose.
weird-jokes.com/best-dad-jokes

It’s hard to choose which body part is my favorite.
But I pick my nose.

Andrey Bratus @abratus.bsky.social · 4d

#sarcasm
A typical job interview is a conversation between two liars.
weird-jokes.com/human-resour...

Andrey Bratus @abratus.bsky.social · 4d

#sarcasm
I know right from wrong.
Wrong is the fun one.
weird-jokes.com/best-sarcast...

I know right from wrong.
Wrong is the fun one.

Andrey Bratus @abratus.bsky.social · 4d

Marriage is like a deck of cards.
At first, it’s all hearts and diamonds. Then you realize your spouse is holding a club and a spade.

Weird jokes weird-jokes.com

Weird Jokes - Bizarre, Funny, and Totally Oddball Humor.

Welcome to Weird Jokes, where laughter never ends. We've got a wide variety of weirdest jokes, memes and puns, come on in and join the fun!

weird-jokes.com