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Rob Watkins

@whelkaholism.bsky.social

110 followers 50 following 2.5K posts

Cowzy tweet and sowzy tweet and liddle sharksy doisters. https://instagram.com/whelkaholism/

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Rob Watkins @whelkaholism.bsky.social · 7m

I just poured a load of pasta onto the hob instead of into the pan, and I was so bemused by how that could have happened I just ... kept ... pouring.

...If you're wondering how my evening's going

Rob Watkins @whelkaholism.bsky.social · 7h

I thought you were joking, but no, it actually is World Bread Day

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Rob Watkins @whelkaholism.bsky.social · 7h

People in general really like Green policies if they're not told they're Green. If they are, they start frothing about being forced to go vegan and inviting the entire global south into their homes, and then go and vote for parties that actively want them to die

Rob Watkins @whelkaholism.bsky.social · 9h

Finally the new citizens test has some questions about the REAL English culture

Rob Watkins @whelkaholism.bsky.social · 11h

How adorably unsettling

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Rob Watkins @whelkaholism.bsky.social · 1d

As a lorem ipsum example for a reasonably attractive infographic it would be okay. If the kids are supposed to be gaining information from this, well, we're all doomed

Rob Watkins @whelkaholism.bsky.social · 1d

Planning Adam's wedding attire?

Rob Watkins @whelkaholism.bsky.social · 1d

3 points for muttering under your breath

Rob Watkins @whelkaholism.bsky.social · 1d

Those ads where people talk to Spotify, the tiny small print "sequences shortened" no fucking shit, shortened not only the response time but also the 17 times you have to ask before it gets even close to what you wanted / you give up in disgust, pull in, and use the buttons

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Rob Watkins @whelkaholism.bsky.social · 1d

If it actually worked, then being able to control the satnav and music in the car would actually be useful

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Rob Watkins @whelkaholism.bsky.social · 1d

I am hamp
See me plump
I make smile
When u's in grump

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Rob Watkins @whelkaholism.bsky.social · 1d

Mad Ham: Beyond Thunderdome

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Rob Watkins @whelkaholism.bsky.social · 1d

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Rob Watkins @whelkaholism.bsky.social · 1d

Eagerly awaiting Star Trek 15 - The Class Action Suit

Rob Watkins @whelkaholism.bsky.social · 1d

I'm not so sure, I've seen how addicted kids get to Shorts. I worry that an infinite stream of self controllable dopamine hits is just going to turn an entire generation's brains into cream cheese

Rob Watkins @whelkaholism.bsky.social · 2d

Looks like a medium sized stream - the maximum depth though is 65 METRES

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Rob Watkins @whelkaholism.bsky.social · 2d

My old neighbour's surname is Orwell. Might start using him as the example.

"Oh wow, someone being incredibly nice and helpful? Absolutely nothing too much trouble? Quietly competent at virtually everything? How Orwellian."

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Rob Watkins @whelkaholism.bsky.social · 2d

Mood

Rob Watkins @whelkaholism.bsky.social · 2d

@wildobliquities.bsky.social

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Rob Watkins @whelkaholism.bsky.social · 2d

A protagonist in a monster horror movie who has had a weird leech-worm wriggle into his eye socket and crawl around under his skin

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Rob Watkins @whelkaholism.bsky.social · 2d

That can't be real

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Rob Watkins @whelkaholism.bsky.social · 2d

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Rob Watkins @whelkaholism.bsky.social · 2d

Like a giant wifebeating hairless hamster

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Rob Watkins @whelkaholism.bsky.social · 2d

"105,000 people – the Greens’ reported membership – is 0.16 per cent of the population"

The Tories are 0.17% of the population so not sure this plan of saying small numbers out loud with zero context is particularly helpful, Mr Potatohead

Rob Watkins @whelkaholism.bsky.social · 2d

Did anyone ask what her favourite *book* of his was? Because my suspicion is she just named an author she knew people liked

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