Lightnews — Scholar-powered news

swearclock ⌚︎

@swearclock.bsky.social

2.3K followers 5 following 5.9K posts

Throw away your watches - they are obsolete. A bot by Rob Manuel. Add your suggestions here: bit.ly/swearclockform

Posts Media Videos Starter Packs

swearclock ⌚︎ @swearclock.bsky.social · 43m

Let's Cover Ourselves In Honey And Watch Brokeback Mountain On An Ant Hill It's 6:00AM

swearclock ⌚︎ @swearclock.bsky.social · 1h

Mr Muscle's Soapy Titwank It's 5:00AM

swearclock ⌚︎ @swearclock.bsky.social · 2h

Next Door's Alsatian Is On Heat And Can't Find Any Fellow Canines So Please Immediately Lock Up Your Kids It's 4:00AM

swearclock ⌚︎ @swearclock.bsky.social · 3h

Travel Back To 1981 And Make Diana Queen Of Your Farts It's 3:00AM

swearclock ⌚︎ @swearclock.bsky.social · 4h

Let's All Do A Michael Gove Cumface It's 2:00AM

swearclock ⌚︎ @swearclock.bsky.social · 5h

Mummy, That Blind Man Is Wanking In The Park Again It's 1:00AM

swearclock ⌚︎ @swearclock.bsky.social · 6h

Bang! And The Shite Is Gone It's 12:00AM

1 3

swearclock ⌚︎ @swearclock.bsky.social · 7h

Fist My Mothers Smiling Hedgehog It's 11:00PM

swearclock ⌚︎ @swearclock.bsky.social · 8h

Knot My Flaps, My Flange Is Full It's 10:00PM

swearclock ⌚︎ @swearclock.bsky.social · 9h

Abandon A Porno At The Halfway Point Because There's Too Much Male Anus On Display It's 9:00PM

1 3

swearclock ⌚︎ @swearclock.bsky.social · 10h

Boiled Piss And Nips It's 8:00PM

swearclock ⌚︎ @swearclock.bsky.social · 11h

Shove A Spork Up My Rectum And Eat My Tapeworms Like They're Spaghetti It's 7:00PM

swearclock ⌚︎ @swearclock.bsky.social · 12h

Shit Into Your Kid's Lunchbox Then Send Them Off To School It's 6:00PM

1 3

swearclock ⌚︎ @swearclock.bsky.social · 13h

Accidental Goatse While Pushing Out A Hard Poo It's 5:00PM

1 3

swearclock ⌚︎ @swearclock.bsky.social · 14h

Program A Robot To Fellate A Liberal Democrat Mp It's 4:00PM

swearclock ⌚︎ @swearclock.bsky.social · 15h

Get A Blowjob Off Someone With Even Worse Teeth Than Shane Mcgowan It's 3:00PM

swearclock ⌚︎ @swearclock.bsky.social · 16h

You're About As Much Use As Tits On A Fridge It's 2:00PM

1 4

swearclock ⌚︎ @swearclock.bsky.social · 17h

The Magical Fistery Tour Is Cumming To Fist You Away It's 1:00PM

swearclock ⌚︎ @swearclock.bsky.social · 18h

Xylophone Buggery It's 12:00PM

1 1 5

swearclock ⌚︎ @swearclock.bsky.social · 19h

How Shit Must You Be To Be Officially Declared Unfit To Be A Member Of The House Of Cunting Lords? So Shit That It's 11:00AM

swearclock ⌚︎ @swearclock.bsky.social · 20h

Thank Fuck It's 10:00AM

swearclock ⌚︎ @swearclock.bsky.social · 21h

Shit The Fucking Bed! It's 9:00AM

swearclock ⌚︎ @swearclock.bsky.social · 23h

Boris Is A Twat It's 7:00AM

1 9

swearclock ⌚︎ @swearclock.bsky.social · 1d

Harry Kane's Post Shag Jizz Dribble It's 6:00AM

swearclock ⌚︎ @swearclock.bsky.social · 1d

Mary Had A Little Clam It's 5:00AM