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Reposted by Chonk

🔞 Rachel's Den 🏳️‍⚧️ @chonkden.bsky.social · 14h

To celebrate the logo and getting back to it. Little rebrand too!

Due to my environment I don't get to hear my real name much at all. Chonk's been a nice nickname, but I'd like to be known as Rachel in this space.

🔞 Rachel's Den 🏳️‍⚧️ @chonkden.bsky.social · 19h

As promised! Logo reveal!

Singing Strix is a big one and I have templates planned for each arc's chapter releases. Having a great little symbolic logo just makes sense.

I'll dive more into the meaning of this soon. For now, theorise! Why that color scheme? Why the demonic theme? All have answers!

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Reposted by Chonk

🔞 Rachel's Den 🏳️‍⚧️ @chonkden.bsky.social · 19h

As promised! Logo reveal!

Singing Strix is a big one and I have templates planned for each arc's chapter releases. Having a great little symbolic logo just makes sense.

I'll dive more into the meaning of this soon. For now, theorise! Why that color scheme? Why the demonic theme? All have answers!

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Chonk @roundchickgal.bsky.social · 17h

It just sucks to be given up on. Exhausting but it's my fault. I need to do better

Chonk @roundchickgal.bsky.social · 19h

I need to be impersonal, quiet and dead inside. I am not fun. I am not worth it. Nobody thinks that and they're fooling themselves if they are.

I'm a pox barely worth keeping around for an occasional laugh and art. That's all I am. I can do that part while detransitioning with my Dad until I die

Chonk @roundchickgal.bsky.social · 19h

The thing I need to accept really is that my mental illness is ugly, disgusting and makes me a subhuman nobody will ever want to have around.

Hide what I can and avoid stepping into the outside world ever again. I am nobody's friend or sister or anything. I am, at most, an annoying acquaintance

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Chonk @roundchickgal.bsky.social · 19h

I will eventually. Kind of just about patience now. It is really funny that my Dad's trip went great and he's got a girlfriend though.

Destroying someone's ability to be a human being anyone cares about really seems to just get you everything you want in life. Very cool.

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Chonk @roundchickgal.bsky.social · 21h

I only have use to him. I'm a broken, soulless, panicked mess and I should ideally just dedicate the rest of my life to him until I'm allowed to jump in the river.

I'm a terrible friend. Family will always leave me. Nobody will ever love me. Everyone's just waiting for me to off myself

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Chonk @roundchickgal.bsky.social · 21h

Worst part about all of this is it confirms people do just lie to me. Nobody cares. I am in fact very easy to throw away and forget about.

I'll try and keep the people I love in my life. They'll leave. I have nothing to offer to anyone other than my Dad

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Chonk @roundchickgal.bsky.social · 1d

Family returns to its far more accurate meaning to me of younger sister and the guy who's ruined my ability to be a person.

Hopefully I just don't wake up one of these nights. If the world was only so lucky.

Night. I'll get back to writing tomorrow

Reposted by Chonk

🔞 Rachel's Den 🏳️‍⚧️ @chonkden.bsky.social · 1d

Since I'll never get to wear it again now. You get one, count it, one dress pic from May

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Chonk @roundchickgal.bsky.social · 1d

Real family is for people who deserve anything other than an abusive father

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Chonk @roundchickgal.bsky.social · 1d

At least the universe was set right. All my family leaves. They have to. I'm awful

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Chonk @roundchickgal.bsky.social · 1d

There will come a day where I'm finally brave enough to insure I'm not alive anymore. After constant, endless screw ups and my life continuing to get worse, it would be better for me.

It's the only way to fix me. I deserve it. People deserve to know I'm gone and not a problem anymore

Chonk @roundchickgal.bsky.social · 1d

Truly at my limit for being alive. I cannot cease screwing up and the only solution is the usual getting impersonal and letting the people detach personally from me.

There's probably no helping me. It's over and I'm locked into the abuse barring a miracle

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Chonk @roundchickgal.bsky.social · 1d

Replacing my best friend's wedding with my step brother's funeral is maybe the most darkly funny cosmic twist ever. I truly find new ways to balls everything up and lock myself with my abuser.

At least I still have Stray Valkyrie, Singing Strix and the odd pity chat I suppose.

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Chonk @roundchickgal.bsky.social · 1d

If it's even replied to, and I imagine it's over, I know realistically my project is finished, I won't be trusted to talk to them, nobody will respond to me anymore and I will be kept around out of scarce sympathy at best.

If I can fuck this up then I belong with my Dad

Chonk @roundchickgal.bsky.social · 1d

Bungled that. Asked if we could clarify what our friendship still is but I assume it's finished.

I'm going to stay true to myself on this. If I could screw this up then I'm not fit for public society. I'll do what my younger sister wants but I belong to my Dad. I'm his son

What good am I otherwise

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Reposted by Chonk

🔞 Rachel's Den 🏳️‍⚧️ @chonkden.bsky.social · 1d

The people who've seen the full thing think it's fantastic. Hope I can show it fully soon. I'm just waiting to know things are okay with someone. I hope they are. I don't want to lose this project

🔞 Rachel's Den 🏳️‍⚧️ @chonkden.bsky.social · 3d

Waiting until I know things are okay before I post the full thing and get back to writing Singing Strix. Nervous time and I need to know how things are first.

But, good things coming... We love a good logo don't we, girlies~? 👀

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Reposted by Chonk

れぇ🍤新刊🍈に委託中 @reekkr.bsky.social · 1d

ﾘｮ虹

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