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Maze Rat

@mazerat.bsky.social

250 followers 35 following 1.3K posts

Charisma is my dump stat. He/him. 18+

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Maze Rat @mazerat.bsky.social · 3h

This soup's bananas, b-a-n-a-n-a-s!

Maze Rat @mazerat.bsky.social · 8h

Was just thinking the other day about how that Bill finally had the last laugh.

A dirty hippy, mid flag burning, is about to be impacted by a billy club as part of an officer-involved beating.

Song lyrics say, "There's a lot of flag burners who have got too much freedom. I want to make it legal for policemen to beat 'em.

Maze Rat @mazerat.bsky.social · 17h

I tried to report a scammer a few months ago and they could not have cared less so I'm doubtful they'd do anything about this but it's definitely a huge problem.

Maze Rat @mazerat.bsky.social · 19h

It's too bad K-19 flopped and we never got a K-20.

Maze Rat @mazerat.bsky.social · 19h

This book is wild.

He then dropped to the floor kneeling before Olivia, pushing her skirt up to her waist. Using a fair amount of pressure, he kissed her inner thighs, using his lips and tongue. His hands reached the waistband of her hose. RFK Jr. gently gave a tug and Olivia lifted her hips. He slipped the hose down to her ankles, all the while continuing to knead her skin with his tongue.

Olivia was now wearing only brief white panties. By removing her shirt and skirt, and by leaning back on the couch, she had signaled her desire. Now, she closed her eyes, concentrating on nothing but RFK Jr.'s tongue and lips. He gently teased her by licking the areas around her most sensitive erogenous zone. Then he slipped her panties down her legs and, within seconds, his tongue was inside her, moving rapidly. Olivia felt intense pleasure building.

The joke is that this is actually from Bill O'Reilly's novel, "Those Who Trespass" with the names crudely swapped. There's an audio book narrated by Bill O'Reilly.

Maze Rat @mazerat.bsky.social · 20h

That's awesome! Congratulations to J-ROD, I hope it's a great experience for everyone.

Maze Rat @mazerat.bsky.social · 1d

Is it time to move my 401k into charcoal?

Maze Rat @mazerat.bsky.social · 1d

Spice up your life!

Maze Rat @mazerat.bsky.social · 1d

The non-regulation of the supplements industry is so weird to me. Back when I was into that stuff, you'd see protein powders boasting biologically impossible amounts of protein per scoop and that's like the least sketchy thing going on.

Maze Rat @mazerat.bsky.social · 1d

Are humans allowed in the Discovery Room?

Maze Rat @mazerat.bsky.social · 1d

Share a cartoon from the past that kids today probably never heard of.

Maze Rat @mazerat.bsky.social · 1d

Yeah, I don't really even remember it happening so probably was tied into voter registration.

Maze Rat @mazerat.bsky.social · 2d

Is that what happened to Big Balls?

Maze Rat @mazerat.bsky.social · 2d

I remember when Obama promised that the first thing he was going to do upon taking office was sign the Freedom of Choice Act and then decided he had higher legislative priorities like handing out bags of cash to his corporate buddies.

Maze Rat @mazerat.bsky.social · 2d

Columbus was Genovese! It's all been stolen valor all along.

There are plenty of 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘭 Italians who could be recognized like Frank Franzetta. Franzetta Day would not only recognize a real Italian-American working man but it would also have bitching artwork to help promote it.

Maze Rat @mazerat.bsky.social · 2d

Under Mamdani's Socialism, everyone will be forced to share a single Andie McDowell.

The cover of the hit(?) film "multiplicity" but it says "mamdanicity". It shows 8.2 Michaels Keaton with their arms around each other except for the front one who is embracing Andie McDowell.
Did you know that Michael Keaton's real name is Michael Douglas but since there was already one of those in SAG, he took the last name Keaton after Diane Keaton (may she rest in peace).
Meanwhile, Andie McDowell is not related to Malcolm McDowell but she is the mother of Margaret Qualley.

Maze Rat @mazerat.bsky.social · 3d

Only one Tron I want to hear about.

Geordi The Forge holding up his hand in a "no thanks" way to the Tron Ares poster with the words "Tron Bomb" underneath.
Geordi pointing like "heck yeah" to a picture of Tron Bonne and her servbots.

Maze Rat @mazerat.bsky.social · 3d

Yet they never managed to solve Tina Babar's disappearance.

Maze Rat @mazerat.bsky.social · 3d

She started doing this like Day 1 and it's weird They Live stuff. Not once on any of my mind-numbing trudges through TSA did I think, "You know, this could really use the DHS Secretary babbling at me the whole time."

Maze Rat @mazerat.bsky.social · 3d

Just raises more questions imo.

In a continuation of my "all videogame characters with planes were regularly flying to Little Saint James" theory, Tails is flying a red bi-plane with "Lolita Express" written on the side. Sonic is standing on top and saying, "C'mon Tails! Let's go get some "chili dogs!"

Maze Rat @mazerat.bsky.social · 3d

If Wario wanted to go to Little Saint James, he would just take the Bulldog so as not to leave a trail.

Wario in his comically undersized plane.

Maze Rat @mazerat.bsky.social · 3d

They bonded over their shared love of killing nuns.

Maze Rat @mazerat.bsky.social · 4d

If you think that's woke, don't watch the DEI version from 2011!

Maze Rat @mazerat.bsky.social · 4d

Just saw an ad for ChatGPT where a guy asks for help doing pull-ups, which shows that no one at ChatGPT knows anything about pull-ups (an exercise primarily about body weight and relative strength).

Maze Rat @mazerat.bsky.social · 5d

I needed to walk out the door 10 minutes ago so this is very slapdash if someone wants to do a better riff.

Andrew Cuomo looking at the horse of prosperity while the car bomb of socialism goes off in the background.