Author | Lightnews

Kelsey Walker

@m0mmyl0nglegs.bsky.social

120 followers 53 following 50 posts

unfortunately I am just here to be sexy and cool 😔🙏🏼

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Kelsey Walker @m0mmyl0nglegs.bsky.social · Nov 19

me bringing all my failed tweets to bluesky

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Kelsey Walker @m0mmyl0nglegs.bsky.social · Jun 15

no kings includes short kings :(

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Kelsey Walker @m0mmyl0nglegs.bsky.social · May 10

who wants to be in my conclave

Kelsey Walker @m0mmyl0nglegs.bsky.social · May 3

I can’t even begin to tell u how horny it would make me to hear the way a true crime podcast described me

Kelsey Walker @m0mmyl0nglegs.bsky.social · Apr 14

did you guys feel Katy Perry land on the moon this morning

Kelsey Walker @m0mmyl0nglegs.bsky.social · Mar 27

Scooby gets euthanized

Kelsey Walker @m0mmyl0nglegs.bsky.social · Mar 4

I think if I ever went to the sphere I would shit myself

Kelsey Walker @m0mmyl0nglegs.bsky.social · Mar 2

May the best Oscar win 🙏🏼

Kelsey Walker @m0mmyl0nglegs.bsky.social · Feb 25

I took a month off of bluesky cause nobody appreciated my Swedish chef joke

Kelsey Walker @m0mmyl0nglegs.bsky.social · Feb 1

“Bill Skarsgård” sounds like what the Swedish Chef says when he wants the check

Kelsey Walker @m0mmyl0nglegs.bsky.social · Jan 31

my tax accountant says I’m very creative

Kelsey Walker @m0mmyl0nglegs.bsky.social · Jan 27

You bet your ass

Kelsey Walker @m0mmyl0nglegs.bsky.social · Jan 16

Goddamnitt my milkshake brought the wrong thing again

Kelsey Walker @m0mmyl0nglegs.bsky.social · Jan 15

The anticapitalist to spencer pratt enthusiast pipeline

In this essay I will

Kelsey Walker @m0mmyl0nglegs.bsky.social · Jan 15

Unfortunate time to have this name I think

Kelsey Walker @m0mmyl0nglegs.bsky.social · Jan 8

If you voted for trump the wildfires are your fault

Kelsey Walker @m0mmyl0nglegs.bsky.social · Jan 7

I pray to all that is holy that I am absolutely goated 🙏🏼

Kelsey Walker @m0mmyl0nglegs.bsky.social · Dec 18

everybody STOP talking to me about the orbs I cannot think about the orbs rn!!!!!!

Kelsey Walker @m0mmyl0nglegs.bsky.social · Dec 18

I have rage coursing through my very bones today! happy holidays!

Kelsey Walker @m0mmyl0nglegs.bsky.social · Dec 18

In 2025 I will become a great and prolific martini drinker

Kelsey Walker @m0mmyl0nglegs.bsky.social · Dec 15

timothee chalamet’s little mustache is bothering me. can somebody tell him?

Kelsey Walker @m0mmyl0nglegs.bsky.social · Dec 9

the kid in the pool getting ready to tell you about their parents’ divorce

Reposted by Kelsey Walker

Read the book Read Raising Expectations (and Raising Hell) @jphillll.bsky.social · Dec 8

This Fox segment on the search for the shooter is incredible. Look at how the NYPD searches Central Park lol

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Kelsey Walker @m0mmyl0nglegs.bsky.social · Dec 6

all my big tiddy, big brain girlies are horny for the Copay Crusader 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

Kelsey Walker @m0mmyl0nglegs.bsky.social · Dec 5

guys…can we be unserious for a second?

Kelsey Walker @m0mmyl0nglegs.bsky.social · Dec 4

According to Wrapped, April was my “Cunty Pink Hipster Breakup Runway Yas Queen Grunge Synth Coffee Break Hard Rock Menopause moment”