Author | Lightnews

scary dave

scary dave

@inafewdaves.bsky.social

180 followers 880 following 770 posts

I live inside my own heart, matt damon

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scary dave @inafewdaves.bsky.social · 7h

No idea what’s happening with baseball rn but I’m glad everyone on the timeline is having fun/pissed off

scary dave @inafewdaves.bsky.social · 10h

Found my wifes old iphone from 12 years ago and she has an app on her home screen named “funny pics”

These were simpler times

scary dave @inafewdaves.bsky.social · 13h

Big if true

scary dave @inafewdaves.bsky.social · 13h

Was it something you said?

Reposted by scary dave

lauren @lauren.rotatingsandwiches.com · 18h

i appreciate everyone who took the time to explain why that bad tweet from homeland security doesn't even get the halo lore right. those of us who weren't on the losing side of the console wars are grateful for the info

scary dave @inafewdaves.bsky.social · 18h

Localized entirely within your Slack channel

scary dave @inafewdaves.bsky.social · 18h

Wait this might actually work on him

The Ass is the father of the legs @internethippo.bsky.social · 19h

They're going to change the clocks this weekend and the president is powerless to stop it. Because he's weak and a loser. That's what they're saying sir

scary dave @inafewdaves.bsky.social · 2d

Crunchy lady approached my wife and I at the park and asked “are you cousins or are you on a date?” and I said “both” which I thought was pretty funny until she responded by asking if we know about polyamory

scary dave @inafewdaves.bsky.social · 2d

My coworkers when I need something from them

Wrought iron door, locked, with a sign that reads “open 3 rd sun 1-3 pm”

scary dave @inafewdaves.bsky.social · 3d

Lost media

scary dave @inafewdaves.bsky.social · 3d

Im American, what’s that in refrigerators?

scary dave @inafewdaves.bsky.social · 3d

We’ve had it too good for too long

scary dave @inafewdaves.bsky.social · 4d

Me when my mom buys my favorite cereal

scary dave @inafewdaves.bsky.social · 4d

2016: Titanfall 2 is $60
2025: Titanfall 2 is $4
…
We predict that by 2034 EA will give you $50 to play Titanfall 2

scary dave @inafewdaves.bsky.social · 4d

I fucking love science facebook page

scary dave @inafewdaves.bsky.social · 4d

Stop making me look at that picture of mark zuckerberg

scary dave @inafewdaves.bsky.social · 4d

He failed to place his league-mandated 3 Draft Kings parlays this week

scary dave @inafewdaves.bsky.social · 5d

Worried this might be the first step towards the enshitification of remedy

scary dave @inafewdaves.bsky.social · 5d

“Analyzing…. That was in the top decile of turds by weight. Nice job!”

“Thanks, I’ve been downing Lunchly all week to train”

“Would you like to try again for the record and earn bonus Poopoo Points™️ sponsored by Kohler Plus™️?”

Kohler Wants to Put a Tiny Camera in Your Toilet and Analyze the Contents

The company's new Dekoda toilet accessory is like a little bathroom detective.

scary dave @inafewdaves.bsky.social · 5d

What would you guys do all day if Bill Pencil left this site

scary dave @inafewdaves.bsky.social · 5d

If this turns out to be a temporary tattoo I might laugh so hard I die

graham platner showing the coverup of the totenkopf tattoo. some weird celtic knotwork with a weirdly suffering wolf sticking out of each side.

scary dave @inafewdaves.bsky.social · 5d

Waking up in a ditch after my wife brought me some ketchup and I lovingly called her my ‘condiment cow’

Trashy McTrashface @416raccoon.bsky.social · 5d

Could be worse

A picture of products at a tradeshow. The items are CONDIMENT COW and CONDIMENT SOW. They are plastic wall-mounted cow and pig that have condiment dispensers shaped like nippled hanging out of their stomachs. You seem to have to milk them like an udder to put the condiments ln your food products. The cow and pig are extremely happy to be in this position; it’s unsettling.

scary dave @inafewdaves.bsky.social · 5d

Because if you know its a symbol of your enemy then you can’t also say you don’t know what it is…

Reposted by scary dave

Mark Agee @markagee.bsky.social · 5d

The new tattoo is of "Jeffrey Epstein? The financier?"

Phil Lewis @phillewis.bsky.social · 5d

PORTLAND, Maine (AP) — Maine Senate candidate Graham Platner tells AP he got a new tattoo to cover one seen as a Nazi symbol.

scary dave @inafewdaves.bsky.social · 5d

So is it “we take our enemy's symbols” or ‘he didn’t know what it meant’?