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Doug Gray

@dougdirt24.bsky.social

1.2K followers 120 following 8.7K posts

I write baseball words for a living. Constantly tired and ready to retire. Here to make myself laugh.

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Doug Gray @dougdirt24.bsky.social · 15d

This worked for me. Tell your friends.

Tom Casavant @tom.tomkahe.com · 15d

Ohioans who, correctly, don't want to submit identification to bluesky, this may be useful:

https://gist.github.com/mary-ext/6e27b24a83838202908808ad528b3318

Doug Gray @dougdirt24.bsky.social · 1h

I like the one with Chico's Bail Bonds.

Doug Gray @dougdirt24.bsky.social · 2h

I kind of want one to an audience that erupts in cheering and whistling.

Doug Gray @dougdirt24.bsky.social · 2h

You did not say that in the post I responded to.

Doug Gray @dougdirt24.bsky.social · 2h

Best I can do on short notice

a football player with the number 84 on his jersey is running down the field

Alt: Randy Moss, a football player scored a touchdown and ran to the goalpost where he faced away from the crowd and pretends to pull down his pants to moon them, then does a little dance.

media.tenor.com

Doug Gray @dougdirt24.bsky.social · 2h

After the fine and suspension they are probably paying for it.

Doug Gray @dougdirt24.bsky.social · 2h

Yes.

The Dodgers have done nothing wrong! They are playing by the rules.

Doug Gray @dougdirt24.bsky.social · 2h

two men sitting at a table with the words hey whoa snl

Alt: two men sitting at a table with the words hey whoa snl

media.tenor.com

Doug Gray @dougdirt24.bsky.social · 3h

a man in a lab coat is washing his eyes in a sink in a bathroom .

Alt: a man in a lab coat is washing his eyes in a sink in a bathroom .

media.tenor.com

Doug Gray @dougdirt24.bsky.social · 3h

Oh yeah? Then how did I get all of these Cincinnati Reds hats?

Doug Gray @dougdirt24.bsky.social · 3h

Best decision you've ever made. Followed up by all of the decisions you made that didn't ruin that one for her.

Good job buddy. Happy for you.

Doug Gray @dougdirt24.bsky.social · 5h

Did the Eagle wear a helmet when fighting Ace Ventura?

Doug Gray @dougdirt24.bsky.social · 6h

Randy Johnson. And someone in a bird costume just takes ones in the dome, falls over, and they send a crew out there with a stretcher to cart him off the field.

Claire @baseball-broad.bsky.social · 6h

Mariners fans, who (doesn’t have to be realistic lol) would you like to see throw out a first pitch this week?

Doug Gray @dougdirt24.bsky.social · 6h

The first time the ball in question touched the ground was after the center fielder threw it to the cutoff man and then the cutoff man threw it to the plate, where it finally touched the ground about 1 foot in front of the plate.

I am going to forever be mad at this.

Doug Gray @dougdirt24.bsky.social · 6h

Is the bad tweet that is still up the one where Mike said a guy who hit a baseball 400+ feet and hit the wall before touching the ground was a ground ball double play? I bet it's that one.

A post on bluesky from Mike that says:

I can't believe the bad tweet is still up

no, the other one
no, the other one
no, the other one

yes, that one

Doug Gray @dougdirt24.bsky.social · 6h

If you would just contact me on WhatsApp to claim your prize you won I would stop sending the notifications!

Doug Gray @dougdirt24.bsky.social · 7h

We could solve every single problem on this planet for the amount of money these AI companies have LOST in the last three years.

Doug Gray @dougdirt24.bsky.social · 7h

OpenAI has lost like $10,000,000,000 in the last three years. Ten. Billion. Fucking. Dollars.

PIVOT TO PORN!

Doug Gray @dougdirt24.bsky.social · 7h

Doug Gray @dougdirt24.bsky.social · 8h

a man in a suit and tie holds a piece of paper and says " that 's right "

Alt: a man in a suit and tie holds a piece of paper and says " that 's right "

media.tenor.com

Doug Gray @dougdirt24.bsky.social · 8h

I do hold it against him. Because he's calling me a liar when he says they aren't real. SUCK IT COOP

Doug Gray @dougdirt24.bsky.social · 8h

And here's your link to watch the game live: www.mlb.com/arizona-fall...

Live Streams | Arizona Fall League | MLB.com

Watch the latest games from the Arizona Fall League

Doug Gray @dougdirt24.bsky.social · 9h

Coop don't know shit about fuck.

Doug Gray @dougdirt24.bsky.social · 9h

But also this is me when skynet drops the bomb

a man with a beard and a hat is smiling while holding a gun in his hand .

Alt: A man wearing a radio broadcasting backpack is looking at a super volcano erupting towards him and is telling his listeners how incredible it is as lava and earth fly towards him

media.tenor.com

Doug Gray @dougdirt24.bsky.social · 9h

Here's the thing: It can't learn. That's not how it works.

Doug Gray @dougdirt24.bsky.social · 9h

A photo of a man on the left and the right of the image. It’s the same man, but the image is mirrored so he’s looking at himself. The words “Fancy meeting you here you fuckin idiot piece of shit” are between the two men.