Bank of Mercia
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bankmercia.bsky.social
Bank of Mercia
@bankmercia.bsky.social
570 followers 580 following 2K posts
Please note this account used to be dormant. It's now less so. Wülferhampton Banner picture @shortbreadfairy.bsky.social
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@meadhallwench.bsky.social You are looking particularly demeure this evening
Reposted by Bank of Mercia
Time to get ready for Samhain tomorrow, when there will be the usual game of “Spud-or-treason!” — children demanding root vegetables or threatening to release The Squirrel.

And beware the spectral potato spirit (“The Great Mash”) which haunts the vaults, whispering secrets about missing ledgers.
It would be an honour, your Ladyship
Whatever happened to the Judean People's Front, Reg?
You only denied it wasn't crusty.

Ergo, everything else was correct.

I'm not convinced it isn't crusty either, given your diet
So you admit you talk out of it then
Don't you only have a tiny, crusty tree rat arse to talk out of as well?
As long as it's not complete bollocks
Time to get ready for Samhain tomorrow, when there will be the usual game of “Spud-or-treason!” — children demanding root vegetables or threatening to release The Squirrel.

And beware the spectral potato spirit (“The Great Mash”) which haunts the vaults, whispering secrets about missing ledgers.
They do all - of course - have to pay their deposits to The Bank beforehand. As President of The Bank, you do technically own it, so it's a waste of time asking you to pay yourself. Obviously.
Watch out, watch out, the Fyrdy's about!
And a very good morning to you as well, Squiggs
The size on the Squirrel Sausage Surveyor!
It would appear that someone (I wonder who?...) has ordered the dismantling of the East Wing of the Mead Hall to make way for some gawdy ballroom

Look, I know it's been burnt down a few times in the past (blame the Angles!), but it was (kinda) historical and symbolic of the Mercian nation
Looking for pink-elephant inducing substances?

Try 'schroomscrolling

(in fact just try saying 'schroomscrolling...)
Looking at pictures of graves?

That'll be tombscrolling.
Searching for a husband?

Try groomscrolling
You can't even find a penguin with proper chocolate on anymore.

Oh. You meant *those* penguins
@peter-heckel.bsky.social The articles write themselves these days...
I'm not worried about what they get up to in the local corner shop!

So, the gang consists of you, @psychicsquirrel.bsky.social and The Vole.

Getting away from the scene on the back of mopeds. Through the back streets of Paris, holding on to your crown jewels
A voleur, surely*

And don't call me Shirley

*look it up
You and @psychicsquirrel.bsky.social were in this together?!?!

It explains everything

Now to talk to my good friends at le magasin des cops
I tried.

I *really* did.

Got about a third of the way through.

I did finish - and enjoyed - Ulysses though
I am but a mere agent of the Dear Leader - an 'attack gerbil' as @psychicsquirrel.bsky.social says.

That level of information is beyond my pay grade