Zak Koonce
@zakkoonce.bsky.social
Write comedy and talk shit. Co-Founder of @auralnauts.bsky.social
Currently at https://youtube.com/@zaksgarbage
Currently at https://youtube.com/@zaksgarbage
Maybe being an adult means quit being a passive aggressive little bitch and minding your own business
November 28, 2025 at 9:53 PM
Maybe being an adult means quit being a passive aggressive little bitch and minding your own business
Buddy can’t cook and thinks everyone just tolerates dryness. Like the time Ben Shapiro’s wife assured him it was not normal for women to have WAP.
November 27, 2025 at 8:18 PM
Buddy can’t cook and thinks everyone just tolerates dryness. Like the time Ben Shapiro’s wife assured him it was not normal for women to have WAP.
The only thing a zombie apocalypse would give us is dipshits like this who would downplay the zombie threat and then put their own friends and family in danger by lying about getting bit.
November 12, 2025 at 7:57 PM
The only thing a zombie apocalypse would give us is dipshits like this who would downplay the zombie threat and then put their own friends and family in danger by lying about getting bit.
What a surprisingly delightful AI generated summary of my latest video. Even though computers are incapable of smell, it can still appreciate an entirely odor based bit.
October 29, 2025 at 5:49 PM
What a surprisingly delightful AI generated summary of my latest video. Even though computers are incapable of smell, it can still appreciate an entirely odor based bit.
Got some new channel banner art today courtesy of @mvbramley.art
October 20, 2025 at 10:20 PM
Got some new channel banner art today courtesy of @mvbramley.art
Selling Black Phone’s child predator in the Fortnite store is a wild choice, but not as wild as including his kid snatchin’ Van.
October 17, 2025 at 6:23 AM
Selling Black Phone’s child predator in the Fortnite store is a wild choice, but not as wild as including his kid snatchin’ Van.
This looks like someone tried jumping the train tracks with a flux capacitor powered dirt-bike.
October 5, 2025 at 11:36 PM
This looks like someone tried jumping the train tracks with a flux capacitor powered dirt-bike.
Also, you would absolutely hate being in public around me and my expressive Ozone hat
September 30, 2025 at 7:13 PM
Also, you would absolutely hate being in public around me and my expressive Ozone hat
My war crime: just wanting to make silly little videos while still being able to afford to fix my teeth and also wanting the same for others. I must be stopped at all costs.
September 30, 2025 at 4:27 PM
My war crime: just wanting to make silly little videos while still being able to afford to fix my teeth and also wanting the same for others. I must be stopped at all costs.
Working on a new project. Stay tuned.
September 25, 2025 at 11:36 PM
Working on a new project. Stay tuned.
Me listening to Borderlands 4 quest givers doing unskippable peepee and poopoo material when all I want is XP and new guns.
September 18, 2025 at 6:09 PM
Me listening to Borderlands 4 quest givers doing unskippable peepee and poopoo material when all I want is XP and new guns.
One of the best thing I ever wrote was about Robert Redford’s nipples. Rest in peace, king.
September 16, 2025 at 6:12 PM
One of the best thing I ever wrote was about Robert Redford’s nipples. Rest in peace, king.
As your resident parody content creator and also mixed martial arts fan, it’s my job to inform you this is not, I repeat NOT parody.
September 5, 2025 at 8:55 PM
As your resident parody content creator and also mixed martial arts fan, it’s my job to inform you this is not, I repeat NOT parody.
Bald guy privilege is being able to laugh at Dean Koontz’ fucking monster of a wig right to his face while the rest of you have to pretend it looks totally natural.
August 27, 2025 at 8:46 PM
Bald guy privilege is being able to laugh at Dean Koontz’ fucking monster of a wig right to his face while the rest of you have to pretend it looks totally natural.
I’ve been alive long enough to recognize a legendary item location when I see one.
August 19, 2025 at 1:06 AM
I’ve been alive long enough to recognize a legendary item location when I see one.
Another awesome episode of the @vhuspodcast.bsky.social
August 13, 2025 at 7:11 PM
Another awesome episode of the @vhuspodcast.bsky.social
Need to do a marathon
August 13, 2025 at 7:10 PM
Need to do a marathon
Tron producer: “Mr. Leto would like to know if it’s possible for a program to be…uh…damp.”
July 17, 2025 at 9:58 PM
Tron producer: “Mr. Leto would like to know if it’s possible for a program to be…uh…damp.”
Me looking on in stoic appreciation
May 16, 2025 at 5:47 PM
Me looking on in stoic appreciation
I need to consult my Yo! MTV Raps trading cards. Off the top of my head though…
May 6, 2025 at 5:10 PM
I need to consult my Yo! MTV Raps trading cards. Off the top of my head though…
If anyone is running low on glistening sweat, I’m apparently still the #1 source.
March 16, 2025 at 3:20 PM
If anyone is running low on glistening sweat, I’m apparently still the #1 source.
Me when people tell me to get out of the house more often.
February 3, 2025 at 5:32 PM
Me when people tell me to get out of the house more often.
Turbo tax thinks just because they’ve fucked me so many times they need to advertise to me like a dating app.
February 2, 2025 at 8:28 PM
Turbo tax thinks just because they’ve fucked me so many times they need to advertise to me like a dating app.
Me opening up news apps in the morning despite my mental health
January 26, 2025 at 7:10 PM
Me opening up news apps in the morning despite my mental health
Can we please just do a terminator instead of whatever the fuck this is?
January 7, 2025 at 10:37 PM
Can we please just do a terminator instead of whatever the fuck this is?