@tyyvolstead.bsky.social
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the creature should be able to let it hang if he wants
November 17, 2025 at 6:50 AM
the creature should be able to let it hang if he wants
taking the car into the shop and asking the mechanic to "get under there and milk that thing"
August 5, 2025 at 7:06 PM
taking the car into the shop and asking the mechanic to "get under there and milk that thing"
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Nothing better than cracking open an ice cold beer and seeing what's inside
July 28, 2025 at 10:19 PM
Nothing better than cracking open an ice cold beer and seeing what's inside
crawling under the bed until the sun comes up. A dozen Tecate empties scattered by my side. -God has truly forsaken me. My phone keeps ringing and when I answer o i hear the ocean
July 25, 2025 at 6:25 AM
crawling under the bed until the sun comes up. A dozen Tecate empties scattered by my side. -God has truly forsaken me. My phone keeps ringing and when I answer o i hear the ocean
working with internal business stakeholders to ""unass this shit""
July 25, 2025 at 6:04 AM
working with internal business stakeholders to ""unass this shit""
pebis caught in the contraption
July 25, 2025 at 5:48 AM
pebis caught in the contraption
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throwing up the peace sign while running over god in my F-350
July 19, 2025 at 3:26 AM
throwing up the peace sign while running over god in my F-350
devising the most convoluted autoerotic asphyxiation rig that leaves investigators baffled
July 12, 2025 at 7:35 PM
devising the most convoluted autoerotic asphyxiation rig that leaves investigators baffled
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officer-involved gooning
May 20, 2025 at 7:15 PM
officer-involved gooning
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washing down an ice cold beer with a nice cold beer
July 8, 2025 at 12:16 AM
washing down an ice cold beer with a nice cold beer
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taiwan beer world class beer from taiwan
June 16, 2025 at 1:36 AM
taiwan beer world class beer from taiwan
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She wanna fuck on a roku owner. She wanna ball with a man who can stream movies on his roku. She wants roku owner penis. No pussy for hdmi cable to laptop setups. Women go crazy for roku owners. Panties soaked when she see the roku. She wanna come over and see the hd streaming on my roku
March 17, 2025 at 5:29 PM
She wanna fuck on a roku owner. She wanna ball with a man who can stream movies on his roku. She wants roku owner penis. No pussy for hdmi cable to laptop setups. Women go crazy for roku owners. Panties soaked when she see the roku. She wanna come over and see the hd streaming on my roku
[hanging with the fellas] y'know, for me, personally, the only thing that really gets my dick hard is true loves kiss [the fellas beat me to death and drag my burnt corpse through the town square behind a horse]
May 24, 2025 at 1:22 AM
[hanging with the fellas] y'know, for me, personally, the only thing that really gets my dick hard is true loves kiss [the fellas beat me to death and drag my burnt corpse through the town square behind a horse]
once again have managed a very respectable amount of piss all the way into the toilet. i am untouchable
May 24, 2025 at 1:14 AM
once again have managed a very respectable amount of piss all the way into the toilet. i am untouchable
every day they want to kill me for drawing pictures of jesus with his ass spread wide open. meanwhile i am calm. i am like the budda
May 24, 2025 at 1:07 AM
every day they want to kill me for drawing pictures of jesus with his ass spread wide open. meanwhile i am calm. i am like the budda
i would write so much wise shit if i was living in exile
May 24, 2025 at 1:04 AM
i would write so much wise shit if i was living in exile
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Benjamin Button but it’s just his dick and balls aging backwards
May 12, 2025 at 11:04 PM
Benjamin Button but it’s just his dick and balls aging backwards
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smoking metaphorical crack
May 10, 2025 at 11:58 PM
smoking metaphorical crack
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Sorry I couldn’t hear you I was pissing really loud
May 4, 2025 at 12:47 AM
Sorry I couldn’t hear you I was pissing really loud
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shitting, mostly
April 11, 2025 at 8:52 PM
shitting, mostly
back in the day if opium didnt do it for you the only option was having an army of slaves build you a sweetass tomb that would last the ages
April 11, 2025 at 3:36 AM
back in the day if opium didnt do it for you the only option was having an army of slaves build you a sweetass tomb that would last the ages
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i will never sleep and i will never die
April 6, 2025 at 4:05 AM
i will never sleep and i will never die
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Pouring a big ol’ can of beer over ice cubes and drinking it through a straw and smacking my lips and saying “ahh” after each suck
March 30, 2025 at 12:58 AM
Pouring a big ol’ can of beer over ice cubes and drinking it through a straw and smacking my lips and saying “ahh” after each suck