Not The Onion
@thisisnottheonion.bsky.social
Sadly, this is not the Onion.
For true stories that you could have sworn were from The Onion.
For true stories that you could have sworn were from The Onion.
Republican Governor Candidate Proposes Female Undocumented Immigrants Can Stay If They Marry “Incels”
2paragraphs.com/2025/04/repu...
2paragraphs.com/2025/04/repu...
April 19, 2025 at 5:54 PM
Republican Governor Candidate Proposes Female Undocumented Immigrants Can Stay If They Marry “Incels”
2paragraphs.com/2025/04/repu...
2paragraphs.com/2025/04/repu...
White House Says It Has Tech That Can 'Manipulate Time and Space'
www.newsweek.com/white-house-...
www.newsweek.com/white-house-...
April 18, 2025 at 7:08 PM
White House Says It Has Tech That Can 'Manipulate Time and Space'
www.newsweek.com/white-house-...
www.newsweek.com/white-house-...
RFK Jr. Touted as 'Unfit' After Rant About Lack of Autism in 'Older People': 'He Cannot Be This Stupid'
www.latintimes.com/rfk-jr-toute...
www.latintimes.com/rfk-jr-toute...
April 18, 2025 at 5:47 PM
RFK Jr. Touted as 'Unfit' After Rant About Lack of Autism in 'Older People': 'He Cannot Be This Stupid'
www.latintimes.com/rfk-jr-toute...
www.latintimes.com/rfk-jr-toute...
Republican allowed into El Salvador prison, as Democrat denied access
www.newsweek.com/republican-r...
www.newsweek.com/republican-r...
April 17, 2025 at 10:30 PM
Republican allowed into El Salvador prison, as Democrat denied access
www.newsweek.com/republican-r...
www.newsweek.com/republican-r...
Republicans consider increasing taxes on the rich
thehill.com/homenews/hou...
thehill.com/homenews/hou...
April 17, 2025 at 7:01 PM
Republicans consider increasing taxes on the rich
thehill.com/homenews/hou...
thehill.com/homenews/hou...
X Is Ditching DMs Hours After as News of Musk Messaging Women About Impregnating Them Breaks
www.latintimes.com/x-ditching-d...
www.latintimes.com/x-ditching-d...
April 17, 2025 at 5:17 PM
X Is Ditching DMs Hours After as News of Musk Messaging Women About Impregnating Them Breaks
www.latintimes.com/x-ditching-d...
www.latintimes.com/x-ditching-d...
Bride late to her own wedding stopped by officer after driving 105 mph in a 45
wsvn.com/news/local/f...
wsvn.com/news/local/f...
April 16, 2025 at 9:34 PM
Bride late to her own wedding stopped by officer after driving 105 mph in a 45
wsvn.com/news/local/f...
wsvn.com/news/local/f...
RFK Jr. calls rising autism rate an ‘epidemic.’ Researchers call it a 'good sign'
www.statnews.com/2025/04/15/r...
www.statnews.com/2025/04/15/r...
April 16, 2025 at 8:14 PM
RFK Jr. calls rising autism rate an ‘epidemic.’ Researchers call it a 'good sign'
www.statnews.com/2025/04/15/r...
www.statnews.com/2025/04/15/r...
‘American Psycho’ Director Baffled by ‘Wall Street Bros’ Still Idolizing Patrick Bateman: They Don’t Realize the Movie Is a ‘Gay Man’s Satire on Masculinity’
variety.com/2025/film/ne...
variety.com/2025/film/ne...
April 16, 2025 at 5:52 PM
‘American Psycho’ Director Baffled by ‘Wall Street Bros’ Still Idolizing Patrick Bateman: They Don’t Realize the Movie Is a ‘Gay Man’s Satire on Masculinity’
variety.com/2025/film/ne...
variety.com/2025/film/ne...
DeSantis says Florida Republicans ‘rotten,’ ‘colluding with Democrats’ amid Hope Florida controversy
www.wfla.com/news/florida...
www.wfla.com/news/florida...
April 15, 2025 at 10:33 PM
DeSantis says Florida Republicans ‘rotten,’ ‘colluding with Democrats’ amid Hope Florida controversy
www.wfla.com/news/florida...
www.wfla.com/news/florida...
ICE Realize They Arrested Wrong Teen, Say 'Take Him Anyway'
www.newsweek.com/merwil-gutie...
www.newsweek.com/merwil-gutie...
April 15, 2025 at 4:45 PM
ICE Realize They Arrested Wrong Teen, Say 'Take Him Anyway'
www.newsweek.com/merwil-gutie...
www.newsweek.com/merwil-gutie...
DHS told her to leave the country. She's a citizen — and an immigration attorney
www.nbcboston.com/news/local/m...
www.nbcboston.com/news/local/m...
April 14, 2025 at 8:50 PM
DHS told her to leave the country. She's a citizen — and an immigration attorney
www.nbcboston.com/news/local/m...
www.nbcboston.com/news/local/m...
President of El Salvador says he won't return mistakenly deported man to U.S.
www.nbcnews.com/politics/tru...
www.nbcnews.com/politics/tru...
April 14, 2025 at 6:03 PM
President of El Salvador says he won't return mistakenly deported man to U.S.
www.nbcnews.com/politics/tru...
www.nbcnews.com/politics/tru...
Stephen A. Smith says he has 'no choice' but to consider a run for president
abcnews.go.com/Politics/ste...
abcnews.go.com/Politics/ste...
April 14, 2025 at 2:26 AM
Stephen A. Smith says he has 'no choice' but to consider a run for president
abcnews.go.com/Politics/ste...
abcnews.go.com/Politics/ste...
New Study: A Lack of Intelligence, Not Training, May Be Why People Struggle With Computers
scitechdaily.com/new-study-a-...
scitechdaily.com/new-study-a-...
April 13, 2025 at 5:02 PM
New Study: A Lack of Intelligence, Not Training, May Be Why People Struggle With Computers
scitechdaily.com/new-study-a-...
scitechdaily.com/new-study-a-...
Musk Mocked After 'Top Secret' Cabinet Meeting Notes Go Viral: 'They Wrote That to Make Him Feel Included'
www.latintimes.com/musk-mocked-...
www.latintimes.com/musk-mocked-...
April 12, 2025 at 4:18 PM
Musk Mocked After 'Top Secret' Cabinet Meeting Notes Go Viral: 'They Wrote That to Make Him Feel Included'
www.latintimes.com/musk-mocked-...
www.latintimes.com/musk-mocked-...
Republican Lawmaker Ridiculed for Suggesting Ditching China's 'Cheap Goods' Will Help Families: 'Kids Don't Need Toys, They Need Tariffs'
www.latintimes.com/republican-l...
www.latintimes.com/republican-l...
April 12, 2025 at 12:55 AM
Republican Lawmaker Ridiculed for Suggesting Ditching China's 'Cheap Goods' Will Help Families: 'Kids Don't Need Toys, They Need Tariffs'
www.latintimes.com/republican-l...
www.latintimes.com/republican-l...
White House orders NIH to research trans 'regret' and 'detransition'
www.npr.org/sections/sho...
www.npr.org/sections/sho...
April 11, 2025 at 10:54 PM
White House orders NIH to research trans 'regret' and 'detransition'
www.npr.org/sections/sho...
www.npr.org/sections/sho...
Education Secretary Wants 'A1' in Classrooms as Early as Kindergarten. She Means AI
www.latintimes.com/education-se...
www.latintimes.com/education-se...
April 11, 2025 at 7:44 PM
Education Secretary Wants 'A1' in Classrooms as Early as Kindergarten. She Means AI
www.latintimes.com/education-se...
www.latintimes.com/education-se...
Jamie Dimon says Gen Z has no reason to be depressed—as long as there’s no nuclear war they’ll have an ‘unbelievable life’
fortune.com/2025/04/10/j...
fortune.com/2025/04/10/j...
April 11, 2025 at 4:42 PM
Jamie Dimon says Gen Z has no reason to be depressed—as long as there’s no nuclear war they’ll have an ‘unbelievable life’
fortune.com/2025/04/10/j...
fortune.com/2025/04/10/j...
RFK Jr. Says US Will Know Cause of Autism 'Epidemic 'by September
www.newsweek.com/rfk-jr-says-...
www.newsweek.com/rfk-jr-says-...
April 10, 2025 at 9:12 PM
RFK Jr. Says US Will Know Cause of Autism 'Epidemic 'by September
www.newsweek.com/rfk-jr-says-...
www.newsweek.com/rfk-jr-says-...
Weezer bassist’s wife shot by L.A. cops, booked for attempted murder
ktla.com/news/local-n...
ktla.com/news/local-n...
April 10, 2025 at 6:05 PM
Weezer bassist’s wife shot by L.A. cops, booked for attempted murder
ktla.com/news/local-n...
ktla.com/news/local-n...
Vice President of Bikers Against Child Abuse Arrested for S*x Crimes Against Children
www.wivb.com/news/crime/v...
www.wivb.com/news/crime/v...
April 10, 2025 at 12:45 AM
Vice President of Bikers Against Child Abuse Arrested for S*x Crimes Against Children
www.wivb.com/news/crime/v...
www.wivb.com/news/crime/v...
Republican senator floats using violence against journalists who report 'fake news'
www.nbcnews.com/politics/con...
www.nbcnews.com/politics/con...
April 9, 2025 at 7:56 PM
Republican senator floats using violence against journalists who report 'fake news'
www.nbcnews.com/politics/con...
www.nbcnews.com/politics/con...
Mexico warns against potential U.S. drone strikes on cartels
www.spokesman.com/stories/2025...
www.spokesman.com/stories/2025...
April 9, 2025 at 5:10 PM
Mexico warns against potential U.S. drone strikes on cartels
www.spokesman.com/stories/2025...
www.spokesman.com/stories/2025...