The Poly Advisor (Michael E. Rubin)
@thepolyadvisor.bsky.social
• Helping Humans ethically navigate Non-Monogamy
• On a mission to end toxic masculinity
• Proud Ally & Jolly Good Fella
• @merubin75.bsky.social
✉️ [email protected]
☎️ 847.370.3421
• On a mission to end toxic masculinity
• Proud Ally & Jolly Good Fella
• @merubin75.bsky.social
✉️ [email protected]
☎️ 847.370.3421
Dating an ex.
• Would you? Why or why not?
• Have you? Why or why not?
#polyqotd #polysky #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
• Would you? Why or why not?
• Have you? Why or why not?
#polyqotd #polysky #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
May 16, 2025 at 12:04 PM
Dating an ex.
• Would you? Why or why not?
• Have you? Why or why not?
#polyqotd #polysky #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
• Would you? Why or why not?
• Have you? Why or why not?
#polyqotd #polysky #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
Do you fear being “replaced” in polyamory? I suggest a reframe.
“They aren't dating a new partner instead of me.
It’s a new partner IN ADDITION to me.”
#polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
“They aren't dating a new partner instead of me.
It’s a new partner IN ADDITION to me.”
#polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
May 15, 2025 at 6:57 PM
Do you fear being “replaced” in polyamory? I suggest a reframe.
“They aren't dating a new partner instead of me.
It’s a new partner IN ADDITION to me.”
#polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
“They aren't dating a new partner instead of me.
It’s a new partner IN ADDITION to me.”
#polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
“Polyam relationships offer more love loving others without taking away from the love already established.” - Dr. Elisabeth Sheff
Do you feel like you can love others without taking anything away from your existing relationship? Why or why not?
#polyqotd #polyamory #poly #ENM #polysky
Do you feel like you can love others without taking anything away from your existing relationship? Why or why not?
#polyqotd #polyamory #poly #ENM #polysky
May 10, 2025 at 1:04 PM
“Polyam relationships offer more love loving others without taking away from the love already established.” - Dr. Elisabeth Sheff
Do you feel like you can love others without taking anything away from your existing relationship? Why or why not?
#polyqotd #polyamory #poly #ENM #polysky
Do you feel like you can love others without taking anything away from your existing relationship? Why or why not?
#polyqotd #polyamory #poly #ENM #polysky
THURSDAY IS TRASH DAY!
What is something or someone you’d like to take out and leave to be picked up with the trash?
Some examples could be:
• “This cold that just won’t go away!”
• “My aunt’s opinions about polyamory and my relationships.”
• “My family's ridiculous judgment."
#trashday
What is something or someone you’d like to take out and leave to be picked up with the trash?
Some examples could be:
• “This cold that just won’t go away!”
• “My aunt’s opinions about polyamory and my relationships.”
• “My family's ridiculous judgment."
#trashday
May 8, 2025 at 1:06 PM
THURSDAY IS TRASH DAY!
What is something or someone you’d like to take out and leave to be picked up with the trash?
Some examples could be:
• “This cold that just won’t go away!”
• “My aunt’s opinions about polyamory and my relationships.”
• “My family's ridiculous judgment."
#trashday
What is something or someone you’d like to take out and leave to be picked up with the trash?
Some examples could be:
• “This cold that just won’t go away!”
• “My aunt’s opinions about polyamory and my relationships.”
• “My family's ridiculous judgment."
#trashday
Did you open your relationship to make someone else happy?
#polysky #polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
#polysky #polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
May 7, 2025 at 11:59 AM
Did you open your relationship to make someone else happy?
#polysky #polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
#polysky #polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
My biggest polyamory green flag is __________.
#polysky #polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
#polysky #polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
May 6, 2025 at 1:04 PM
My biggest polyamory green flag is __________.
#polysky #polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
#polysky #polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
IMAGINE THIS: Your best friend calls and says, “My partner wants to open our relationship.”
You want to be helpful.
What’s the first bit of advice you share?
#polysky #polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
You want to be helpful.
What’s the first bit of advice you share?
#polysky #polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
May 5, 2025 at 10:13 PM
IMAGINE THIS: Your best friend calls and says, “My partner wants to open our relationship.”
You want to be helpful.
What’s the first bit of advice you share?
#polysky #polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
You want to be helpful.
What’s the first bit of advice you share?
#polysky #polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
HOW DO YOU HANDLE IT
Your partner posts couple-y photos with someone new. What do you do?
#polyqotd #polysky #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
Your partner posts couple-y photos with someone new. What do you do?
#polyqotd #polysky #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
May 5, 2025 at 1:04 PM
HOW DO YOU HANDLE IT
Your partner posts couple-y photos with someone new. What do you do?
#polyqotd #polysky #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
Your partner posts couple-y photos with someone new. What do you do?
#polyqotd #polysky #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
That “holy crap!” moment when you realize monogamy was never a choice but actually an enforced cultural narrative that is programmed into us by conservatism and fear from the time we are toddlers.
(Turn the volume on.)
#polyamory #polysky #monogamy
(Turn the volume on.)
#polyamory #polysky #monogamy
May 3, 2025 at 10:41 AM
That “holy crap!” moment when you realize monogamy was never a choice but actually an enforced cultural narrative that is programmed into us by conservatism and fear from the time we are toddlers.
(Turn the volume on.)
#polyamory #polysky #monogamy
(Turn the volume on.)
#polyamory #polysky #monogamy
I’m quite envious of how your blanket gets to be on top of you and I don’t. #feralfriday
May 3, 2025 at 4:08 AM
I’m quite envious of how your blanket gets to be on top of you and I don’t. #feralfriday
Or this from Star Trek V? “Please, Captain. Not in front of the Klingons.”
May 2, 2025 at 8:58 PM
Or this from Star Trek V? “Please, Captain. Not in front of the Klingons.”
Do you let your existing partner know you've connected with someone new? If yes, when?
#polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
#polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
May 2, 2025 at 6:42 PM
Do you let your existing partner know you've connected with someone new? If yes, when?
#polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
#polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
What drains your energy faster?
• Processing jealousy or envy in healthy ways
or
• Explaining to monogamous friends why you're “still polyamorous”
#polysky #polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
• Processing jealousy or envy in healthy ways
or
• Explaining to monogamous friends why you're “still polyamorous”
#polysky #polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
May 2, 2025 at 12:05 PM
What drains your energy faster?
• Processing jealousy or envy in healthy ways
or
• Explaining to monogamous friends why you're “still polyamorous”
#polysky #polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
• Processing jealousy or envy in healthy ways
or
• Explaining to monogamous friends why you're “still polyamorous”
#polysky #polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
THURSDAY IS TRASH DAY!
What is something or someone you’d like to take out and leave to be picked up with the trash?
Some examples could be:
• “This cold that won’t go away!”
• “My aunt’s opinions about my relationships.”
• “This guilt I feel from the people who say they love me!”
#trashday
What is something or someone you’d like to take out and leave to be picked up with the trash?
Some examples could be:
• “This cold that won’t go away!”
• “My aunt’s opinions about my relationships.”
• “This guilt I feel from the people who say they love me!”
#trashday
May 1, 2025 at 12:04 PM
THURSDAY IS TRASH DAY!
What is something or someone you’d like to take out and leave to be picked up with the trash?
Some examples could be:
• “This cold that won’t go away!”
• “My aunt’s opinions about my relationships.”
• “This guilt I feel from the people who say they love me!”
#trashday
What is something or someone you’d like to take out and leave to be picked up with the trash?
Some examples could be:
• “This cold that won’t go away!”
• “My aunt’s opinions about my relationships.”
• “This guilt I feel from the people who say they love me!”
#trashday
FIRST DATE IDEA: Meet up at Barnes and Noble. Head over to the cookbook section and pick out three based on places you’ve visiited or want to travel to. Go to the cafe and order some chai or hot cocoa. Look at the beautiful pictures together and talk about why the place was special.
🧵 1/2
🧵 1/2
May 1, 2025 at 4:52 AM
FIRST DATE IDEA: Meet up at Barnes and Noble. Head over to the cookbook section and pick out three based on places you’ve visiited or want to travel to. Go to the cafe and order some chai or hot cocoa. Look at the beautiful pictures together and talk about why the place was special.
🧵 1/2
🧵 1/2
A praise kink is more than just calling them “good girl” or “good boy.” It could also be:
“keep being good for me”
“you're mine”
“you feel fucking amazing”
“that's my girl / boy”
“you're making me crazy”
“you do it so good”
"Well done Kitten / Tiger”
“I love how you take me”
“you're so perfect”
“keep being good for me”
“you're mine”
“you feel fucking amazing”
“that's my girl / boy”
“you're making me crazy”
“you do it so good”
"Well done Kitten / Tiger”
“I love how you take me”
“you're so perfect”
May 1, 2025 at 4:51 AM
A praise kink is more than just calling them “good girl” or “good boy.” It could also be:
“keep being good for me”
“you're mine”
“you feel fucking amazing”
“that's my girl / boy”
“you're making me crazy”
“you do it so good”
"Well done Kitten / Tiger”
“I love how you take me”
“you're so perfect”
“keep being good for me”
“you're mine”
“you feel fucking amazing”
“that's my girl / boy”
“you're making me crazy”
“you do it so good”
"Well done Kitten / Tiger”
“I love how you take me”
“you're so perfect”
Do you have a “work wife” or “work husband?”
If yes, has being polyamorous made that easier or harder for you?
#polysky #polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM
If yes, has being polyamorous made that easier or harder for you?
#polysky #polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM
April 30, 2025 at 11:03 AM
Do you have a “work wife” or “work husband?”
If yes, has being polyamorous made that easier or harder for you?
#polysky #polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM
If yes, has being polyamorous made that easier or harder for you?
#polysky #polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM
FILL IN THE BLANK: I feel the most “seen” in polyamory when __________.
#polysky #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
#polysky #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
April 29, 2025 at 10:26 PM
FILL IN THE BLANK: I feel the most “seen” in polyamory when __________.
#polysky #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
#polysky #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
Your task: Describe how your latest “first date” went down.
The fun part: You get 6 words or less.
Go!
#polysky #polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
The fun part: You get 6 words or less.
Go!
#polysky #polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
April 29, 2025 at 12:01 PM
Your task: Describe how your latest “first date” went down.
The fun part: You get 6 words or less.
Go!
#polysky #polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
The fun part: You get 6 words or less.
Go!
#polysky #polyqotd #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
SOMETHING TO REMEMBER: In polyamory, their interest isn’t your trophy. It’s just a spark. You decide if it lights a fire or burns itself out trying to reach you.
#polysky #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
#polysky #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
April 28, 2025 at 8:58 PM
SOMETHING TO REMEMBER: In polyamory, their interest isn’t your trophy. It’s just a spark. You decide if it lights a fire or burns itself out trying to reach you.
#polysky #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
#polysky #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
Haircut selfie. The before and after weren't quite as dramatic, but I still felt confident during my job interview this morning. #confidence
April 28, 2025 at 6:44 PM
Haircut selfie. The before and after weren't quite as dramatic, but I still felt confident during my job interview this morning. #confidence
No shame here. When the vibes are good, what’s your next move?
Helpful definition:
Your metamour is your partner’s partner.
Example:
Han loves Leia
Leia also loves Ackbar
Han and Ackbar are metas.
Helpful definition:
Your metamour is your partner’s partner.
Example:
Han loves Leia
Leia also loves Ackbar
Han and Ackbar are metas.
April 28, 2025 at 11:52 AM
No shame here. When the vibes are good, what’s your next move?
Helpful definition:
Your metamour is your partner’s partner.
Example:
Han loves Leia
Leia also loves Ackbar
Han and Ackbar are metas.
Helpful definition:
Your metamour is your partner’s partner.
Example:
Han loves Leia
Leia also loves Ackbar
Han and Ackbar are metas.
In polyamory, their interest isn’t your trophy. It’s just a spark. You decide if it lights a fire or burns itself out trying to reach you. #polysky
April 27, 2025 at 11:18 AM
In polyamory, their interest isn’t your trophy. It’s just a spark. You decide if it lights a fire or burns itself out trying to reach you. #polysky
Instead of dating with a goal, consider this:
Dating to enjoy being with a person you’re compatible with for as long as you enjoy each other’s company, no matter if that’s months, years, or the rest of your lives.
#dating #advice #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
Dating to enjoy being with a person you’re compatible with for as long as you enjoy each other’s company, no matter if that’s months, years, or the rest of your lives.
#dating #advice #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
April 25, 2025 at 10:00 PM
Instead of dating with a goal, consider this:
Dating to enjoy being with a person you’re compatible with for as long as you enjoy each other’s company, no matter if that’s months, years, or the rest of your lives.
#dating #advice #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved
Dating to enjoy being with a person you’re compatible with for as long as you enjoy each other’s company, no matter if that’s months, years, or the rest of your lives.
#dating #advice #polyamory #poly #polyam #ethicalnonmonogamy #ENM #LoveEvolved